A 24-year-old guy described himself in an Internet forum: He doesn’t feel emotion, is an excellent liar, becomes bored quickly, and experiences an adrenalin rush when deceiving or angering someone else. He asks, is he a sociopath?
I’d answer yes. The post is an interesting insight into how a disordered young man perceives himself and others.
Read Self-diagnosing sociopathy on the Dr. Robert forum.
ErinBrock
Per Ann Bradley:
Fight or Flight
Slow down. You are not “crazy”. You are feeling the physical reaction to extreme trauma and stress. Your reaction is normal. It is an awful feeling, but normal under the circumstances.
Your body is in the fight or flight mode and you feel the physicality of your stress. Cortisol and adrenaline, the stress hormones, are flowing through your body causing your heart to race and your breathing to become shallow. (Deep breathing really does help switch from the panic mode to a calmer mode, done deeply enough which means your belly expands as a baby’s does when breathing, then completely emptying the lungs switches you over to the calming side of your nervous system, away from the fight or flight. Give it a chance. Don’t try once then give up. Stay with it. Tell yourself you are in charge of your emotions, that you are learning how not to be a victim, then change your body to feel that way. It CAN work.)
Ox Drover
EB,
Both very good posts! Thanks.
On the first one—yep, boundaries! Learning to set and maintain boundaries helps us to keep others from getting the “steering wheel”—-and driving our “car” where THEY want to go.
The fight or flight—recognizing it and your BREATHING exercises do help—-but realizing that you are IN THAT MODE is sometimes difficult but if you can do it just the act of realizing “I am in fight or flight” helps you to control it from the logical side of your brain.
The last part (quote from above) Tell yourself you are in charge of your emotions, that you are learning how not to be a victim, then change your body to feel that way. It CAN work.) is very good as well. SELF TALK! Good job!
ElizabethBennett
EB-the guy who wrote all that about narcissism must have met both my parents. All that you posted describes what happened today between my father and I and I had to get BOINKED by Oxy for letting other people control my emotions. I figured out what his M.O. is today though and hopefully he won’t change it and throw me off. I have been extremely controlled for years and I am now setting up boundaries that I am not letting either him or my stepmom cross. Thanks for posting that!
Ana
ErinBrock,
Thank you for that post.
Hens, LOLOLOL
Louise
BBE:
I like the way you put the perfect storm. I was trying to come up with words about how or why the things and circumstances happened to me and that is it!! It was a perfect storm of events and feelings and boom. It’s the only explanation of what happened.
KatyDid
Hens,
When it gets close to Halloween, if you hanker for a little crazyness, you can be the elderly old geezer… and although I can’t be a crack ho, I’ll chase you and be your hack crone.
Tell Oxy, I saw an article about ducks breath being used to cure children of thrush and other disorders of the mouth and throat. (Smithsonian, June 2011, pg 57). So just wondering if Oxy plans to sell sucking the breath out of her duckies? Quackery, at it’s best, I think.
KatyDid
EB,
Absolute gems. I was smart enough to save your posts this time!!
ElizabethBennett
Katy-maybe she could just train the ducks to give their breath to people, just walk up and lock lips with someone and breathe into them 🙂
ErinBrock
Katy;
The exspath always proclaimed to ‘know’ how I felt, thought etc….also. I heard regularly, “I KNOW YOU FEEL LIKE I BLAH< BLAH" "I know you don't like to blah blah",
And when I was 'in it' , I found it so frustrating because he couldn't have been further from how I felt or thought! I soon realized, (in the end) that he had NO IDEA who I was or how I thought. After 28 years with a person, this blew me away! He was soooo busy 'knowing' everything about everyone that he never bothered to get to know the truth about others……HENCE…..I used that against him in our divorce…..I switched up my 'buttons', changed my responses that he had become used to and could predict in me……and I WHACKED him with his own measures.
He had/has no idea where I am coming from these days…..he can't predict me, or my next move and he never knew who I was.
He has nothing to draw from.
He knew if he said he loved me and wanted our family, then I'd melt back into his lies. He knew if he accused me of whatever dujour, i'd go wild trying to defend and show him differently……he knew if he projected his behaviors onto me, id be so blown away and taken off balance he could continue to get away with his perverted and covert behaviors.
So……once I shut up, developed patience, stopped taking it personal and reacting and took notes on his spath speak…..I knew where/how to attack and gather documented evidence to use against him.
They DO provide us a road map to their actions…..
ErinBrock
No Hens…..you have the tools to keep those kinds away now darlen!
🙂