In Trenton, New Jersey, a 15-year-old girl sold her 7-year-old stepsister to a group of men and boys at a party for sex.
Read: Cops: N.J. teen sold stepsister, 7, for party sex on Msnbc.com.
In Wales, a 6-year-old was repeatedly stripped, sexually abused and physically assaulted by other children in her school.
Read: Horrific ordeal of girl, six, who was physically and sexually abused by 23 of her primary school classmates on Mail Online.
Links submitted by a Lovefraud reader.
bulletproof – just saw your comment now. thanks. 🙂
i had a horrible day yesterday. last night was unbelievable. so much inner anguish and pain as all the info i have now about the spath collided inside me. i was toxic too (from my place) and the intersection of those things was ugly.
i am off to see the grief counselor this am. i hope talking with her helps to process some of this. i feel so awful.
One-step, Am sending you lots of hugs and white light. Good luck with counseling. 🙂
thanks Kim. good to see a friendly face. yesterday was hellish. i find i am full of tears erupting at every prompt today. and angry at peoples bad/reductive/uncaring/ heartless behavior. bad days.
One step:
you now have a very strong ally to fight with against the EVIL! I would be furious if someone stole my identity and commited outrageous things IT did to you! Did you already inform him?
Take care and let the bad days pass. If there were just good days one could not tell the difference! (and in old days formaldeyde was a component of beauty treatments 😉 no kidding!) We can’t change people, just our attitude towards them and not letting them get to hit our souls/nerves/lacrimal glands/ stomach/heart. I wish you all the best and send you lots of antiemetic ((((((cyberhugs))))))!
One Step,
I am sorry that you are having a rough time right now. Sounds like alot of triggers are attacking you.
It is my belief that there is always a price to pay with any involment, voluntary or involuntary when it comes to a x spath. Just having thoughts “dancing” through our heads about them and the past is enough to trigger our emotions.
“Outing” a spath, requires alot of going back. And that requires thick skin, and a whole LOT more than that. I know this is important to you One, but please be sure that you have weighed in the toll it will take on you.
Maybe the timing isn’t right for you to do this now. Maybe it is, only you can answer this question. But timing always is a factor.
Remember to put yourself first. This journey is about YOU now and whats best for you. Your health, your well being, your getting through this and arriving at a better place in your life.
I am here for you, for support, either way. Just want to offer a gentle reminder, to put yourself, and your needs, right now at this moment, on the top of your “focus” list.
One,
I ache to think of what you suffer from the spath and from all the rest of it.
I’m right behind wits- whatever you do, put YOURSELF first and that means on the top of the stack. What the spath did, they did.
What hurts you hurts and when you allow yourself the time to release it, let it be gone that much further from who you are and where you are.
You can get through this. It may not all be delightful now, but you will change that. And it will be. Dream into it.
I’ll be right here.
Kim I hear you.
How hard I wrestle with the question about what is true and what is more than the eye can see.
Well, I asked over and over and over and then finally the voice inside asked: Who cares? do you want to spend your days worrying about this?
The answer is -NO.
If it was to have been known, it would have before now. It should have. And win draw or lose, the right thing is the right thing.
Hanging around a jailhouse looking for the profound answers to love’s mystery ain’t real. It just ain’t and I won’t go there.
SO whatever wallow your spath is in, don’t follow them. Be all you can be and proudly.
You don’t deserve what you went through and where ever you are that is away from the whole scene, you are in a better place.
Now, what do you ned to do to make it the best place of your life? Dream into it.
I’ll be right here.
Dear Kim,
BOINK! “I am wondering…” You quit that RAT NOW! cause you KNOW the answer to that one! You KNOW he has no alturistic good in him, you know they don’t care, never did care! Now you write 500 times “Psychopaths will not change. They ARE the lie!” And turn it in before supper time! LOL 🙂
One step–I agree with Witty on that one, dealing with them, even to out them takes ENERGY and RESOURCES that can very definitely take AWAY from our own selves the energy and resources we NEED in order to breathe, live, recover, heal, etc.
The Bible talks about a man who is going to build a house, and if he is serious and a smart man, he will sit down and COUNT THE COST BEFORE he starts to build so he will not get a house half built and then discover he doesn’t have enough to complete it.
Expending ENERGY is the same thing as starting a building project. The difference is we can’t count “energy” like we do “money” to determine if we will have enough to complete our projects. So when you are feeling “tired” and “drained” and “sick” that is a very good sign that your ENERGY ACCOUNT IS LOW and your RESOURCES ACCOUNT is not flush, so SLOW DOWN the expendaturess just like you would with a budget on a bank account, and SAVE up for what needs to be done FIRST, for what is MOST important.
I spent WAY to much energy on UN-important crap until I started focusing on what was NECESSARY to be done, and quit focusing on what could wait til later or even never get done and it still be okay.
TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST—it is more important than you know! (((Hugs))))
Kim,
One of the things that all toxic people seem to have in common, is they have the ability to make us to always question ourselves. They create such an illusion, that we loose touch with our own reality.
That is what they seem to do BEST. They make us doubt ourselves.
We might question ourselves in the moment, the next day, a week later, a month later and even YEARS later.
That is some pretty powerful stuff they do. To keep us questioning ourselves and to have us that off balance.
That powerful “stuff” that they do is to keep us from questioning THEIR motives, and their agendas. And to keep us in their “reality” rather than grounded in our OWN reality.
How they can still have us questioning ourselves years after the fact, shows how powerful what they did (to us) really was.
I am often triggered by something and question something going back over 13 years ago before my husband suicided.
Toxic is what it is. I suppose that is all that is necessary for us to know. And to run like hell anytime someone has the power to make us doubt oursleves like that again.
Learning to be true to ourselves after having this experience is an ongoing struggle. But I think an important one.
xxxx
Dear Witty and Kim,
Witty dear your advice and information is very very good! We do allow it to “make us wonder” years later, looking back, and staying true to our TRUTH and REALITY is an ON-going process, and I think forever, to some extent! But when we “catch” ourselves verbalizing these thoughts even if not out loud, but just inside our head, we have to STOP, LOOK, AND LISTEN to ourselves and STOMP out these “bad/untrue thoughts” like a grass fire in your front yard! Get it dead before it burns the house down (again!).
Yesterday when I was talking to my cousin, and I could detect the SLIGHTEST bit of frustration, anger, gaslighting etc from him. It really at first “ticked me off” and frustrated me too, but at the same time, I realize that he isn’t coping well, but he is copiing (and hasn’t suicided or homicided) and having Uncle Monster for a father was VERY TRAUMATIC to say the least. Uncle Monster would hold cousin’s mother, his sibs and him at GUNPOINT for hours and days threatening loudly to shoot one or all of them and ranting and raving about various things. I can’t even IMAGINE having that happen to me as a child, just knowing that Uncle Monster did this to my grandmother pithed me off when I found out about it (the rest had been kept secret from me until Monster’s death.) I did know that Monster had stomped and kicked His wife when she was preg with Cousin in a failed attempt to KILL Cousin before birth. Apparently Cousin did not know this story, and frankly a year or so ago when I was talking to him openly, I told him this story and I think he believed me, seemed to at least and then I think he has gone into DENIAL now. I’m not sure now how WISE it was to actually tell Cousin this, but at the time I was trying to “make him see” that even though his father Uncle Monster had done HORRIBLE THINGS to him (things Cousin remembered) and others too, that my egg donor was PROTECTING Uncle Monster and is protecting my murdering P-offsrping just like she did Uncle Monster.
Maybe I should not have shared the “tried to kill you before birth” saga with Cousin, but I did and not much I can do about it now. Can’t un-ring a bell unfortunately. So just try to keep in “touch” with Cousin on a NON-openly-confrontational basis and pretend I don’t know he is angry at me for not taking back Power of Attorney over the egg donor and playing the game where I don’t notice she is abusing me or putting my life at risk. Oh, well, “you makes your choices and pays yer money and takes yer chances with the results!”
It may not be the “right” choice or even the “best” choice but it’s what I’ve decided to do cause I can’t figure out a better way. Cousin has bought into the “family games” too far to back out now and face the fact that his father was a MONSTER of horrible proportions. It is a painful journey and each of us has to decide to go on that “trip” ourselves, and he isn’t ready to make that leap of faith that life would be better if he accepted “truth” because when we open that door between denial and truth the HALLWAY between them IS DARK, filled with obstacles and sharp objects…and takes a long time to negotiate!