Editor’s note: Although this post describes the Judeo-Christian scripture, Lovefraud respects and honors all religious and spiritual traditions.
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired)
One of my favorite books of the Bible is Proverbs, which was attributed to Solomon, King of Israel, the son of King David. Though reputedly the wisest man in the world, Solomon didn’t always put his philosophies and wisdom to good use in his own life. Nonetheless, the book does have a lot of wisdom in it, including this description of a psychopath.
Proverbs 6:12-19, I think, is a perfect description of the psychopath.
The New Living Bible translation:
12 What are worthless and wicked people like? They are constant liars,
13 signaling their deceit with a wink of the eye, a nudge of the foot, or the wiggle of fingers.
14 Their perverted hearts plot evil,Ӭand they constantly stir up trouble.
15 But they will be destroyed suddenly,Ӭbroken in an instant beyond all hope of healing.
16 There are six things the Lord hates —”¨no, seven things he detests:
17 haughty eyes,Ӭa lying tongue,Ӭhands that kill the innocent,
18 a heart that plots evil,Ӭfeet that race to do wrong,
19 a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family.
Psychopathy is not something new in the world, it is just that we, as former victims or associates of these people, have become acutely aware of the evil that people can do to others. We have personally experienced the pain that comes from the betrayal of a lover, friend, family member, child, parent, or someone else who was very close to us, someone we trusted.
Psychopaths have been around since the beginning of humanity and they have preyed on others. They have risen to the highest levels as kings and dictators of countries, like Stalin and Mao, who have been responsible for the deaths of perhaps a hundred million of people, or they have simply preyed on those that were close to them. The majority of the suffering that mankind as a whole endures, both in mass and individually, is because of the actions of psychopaths.
We may not be able, as individuals, to avoid the mega-troubles brought on by psychopathic rulers, but by learning the “red flags” of a psychopath, by learning how to avoid these people on an individual level in the future, we can keep ourselves safer. We can teach others and teach our children how to recognize these evil ones, and how to avoid becoming intimate with them, how to avoid letting them con us financially and emotionally.
There are many great articles here at Lovefraud that talk about the things that we can spot in a person to see that they are possibly high in psychopathic traits. We call these traits “Red Flags,” because they signal that there is danger in the person who is behaving in that manner. If we ignore these red flags, we will absolutely become embroiled in their deceit and chaos.
The eight short verses above describe perfectly the psychopaths in our lives, who leave behind misery and pain.
The Bible (in verse 17) refers to “haughty eyes,” where in today’s language we would call it arrogance. If a person acts in an arrogant and “entitled” manner, we can see that there is a good chance this person does not value other people highly, but values himself above others.
Verse 12 calls them “constant liars,” which is pretty plain in even today’s language. People who lie continually, sometimes “when the truth would fit better,” are not people we can trust. Doing “business” of any kind with a person who is a “constant liar” is very risky because they cannot be trusted.
Verse 13 speaks about how they “signal their deceit” with a wink of the eye. They make light of their dishonesty, showing that honesty and forthrightness is not something that they value highly.
Verse 14 talks about how they “stir up trouble,” and if that is not a perfect signal, a bright red flag, that someone is up to no good, I don’t know what is. People who are “drama queens and kings” are continually creating chaos and unnecessary pain for others.
Verse 18 speaks about those that “plot evil,” which is pretty clearly something that a psychopath does. This may be something that can be observed from the way they treat others, or it may be something that they tell you about how they have treated someone else. Be assured if they treat others badly, you will eventually become one of the people that they will also treat badly, no matter how nicely they treat you today.
“Stirs up trouble in a family” is mentioned in verse 19 (“sows discord in a family”), and is particularly evident in family interactions with the psychopath, as well as business dealings and relationships with their neighbors.
When we see these characteristics in a person’s daily life, or in their past life, we should realize that there are “red flags” waving to warn us that this person, even if they do not qualify as a “full fledged psychopath,” is high enough in the traits of the psychopath that he or she is toxic to those that are connected with them. They are not worthy of our trust…even if it is just a “little bit” arrogant, or a “little bit” of a liar, or stir up a “little bit” of drama, because people who will do these things, who are dishonest and arrogant, will turn on others at their whim. Avoiding toxic and dramatic, lying and deceitful people is the only way that we can protect ourselves. We can’t change these people, any more than we can change a venomous snake. All we can do is to avoid their proximity to us, so that they are not in a position to harm us.
Our trust is something that is precious and something that we must guard by watching for the red flags in the behavior and actions of others. Guard your trust well.
Zeesh, I wondered where you guys got those.
I was starting to get (oh oh) JEALOUS! 🙂
Let me try: 33
Nope not working for me…I am still jealous…
I will have to check it out…thanks for the link…xxoo
I feel like a kid all over again, playing with you guys 🙂
Duhdupedster
Oxy and TB – thank you both. I know this ‘freak’ thing has been giving me trouble for quite a while now – why i was SO happy to find the freak spath. ‘cept I am freak and she is a SPATH. surprisingly; not the same thing!
i got a bit frustrated working on some of the stuff for the lawyer today – ran our of time and i stoooopidly thought I should see if there was any movement in spath land on the website. fuck the skillet, i got hit with a big ball of slime! mannnnn, was that a waste of my time and energy !!! jayzus! there is still a very sore knot in my chest/ heart area and an insanity of some sort that comes with the slightest peak. the land of shock and awe is still there – just have to open the door. ew ew ew. NC NC NC!
or i am going to have to go on a road trip and smack her. she isn’t doing anything with the old story from what i can see, but just going there EEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
live and learn.
TB – i like your very generous take on my irritation, fear and my sense of being judgemental. and your take OXy, on left right whatever.
I have to start taking a few more risks again. being a bit freakier. i have been doing it with how i dress and that’s helping.
i have also been doing REALLY well with food. i heard a doctor say on the radio, ‘make small sustainable changes’. that really made an impression. since a few weeks ago , when i was freaking about something and said here that i was trying not to eat about it, i have been doing really well. have been shopping more and buying a huge amount of veg and fruit and just filling up on it. I have figured out how much meat i want per week, somehow buying a specific amount each week is creating a structure that makes me relax. i don’t want animal protein all the time, although much of what i read suggests it for people healing from the things i am. but i am just doing what i want. almost no carbs outside of fruit and veg. am feeling much better in my tummy and am feeling more at home in my body (event though my damn knees don’t work well.) Except for a few occasions i have maintained awareness when i am eating, and have had some great conversations with myself about my food choices. losing weight is now on the radar. I have been swimming a bit most days. the exercise is bringing down the swelling in my knees and hands – i am just having trouble with walking – knees aren’t working properly, and my heals feel bruised -its a hike to the water. but i am making some progress for sure.
there have been about a half dozen times in the last 2 weeks that swimming has stopped my head from exploding (work stress related). i swam so hard one day last week that when i got up out of the water my legs went to jelly and i fell down! made me laugh. i was SO pissed off when i got in the water.
about ogden nash – i have always thought i could crawl inside someone else oxy. have wanted it my whole life. now am starting to realize , ’tis not our reality.
Dear One/Joy,
Yea, I hope you looked that poem up, it is REALLY profound. He writes a lot of funny stuff,, and I was surprised when I on accident I found his serious stuff and thought it was so great!
It is rather daunting that we are , REALL ARE, “alone” inside our skulls and no matter how we try we cna’t get anyone else in there and we cannot escape either…but I am coming to accept that, and be OK with it….not being okay with it doesn’t change reality any, but accepting reality believe it or not is OK, and being “alone” inside my skull and accepting that reality is okay too…because we CAN peep out between the bars.
Can you even imagine how “alone” Helen Keller must have felt? No sound and no light either filtering between the bars, only touch. (head shaking here) At least we are able to see the light and hear the sounds, so for that I am grateful. For that and the internet as well…..
oxy – i did.
Ox: I am running an iMac and they have a character slate that has a lot of characters on it. I used to run PC and used an app like one/joy posted. Different keyboard strokes/commands make different symbols/characters. Kinda fun, huh? LOLOL! Like being a kid again. ;p
one/joy: animal protein REALLY helps me! But, grass fed red meat has made a serious jump in my health. All those B vitamins, especially B12 for our nerves and to restore adrenals.
Ox: great post!
TB – i only eat organic meat, grass fed/ no antibiotics for cattle, and free range. no antibiotics for birds. I also eat fish – but mostly canned wild caught tuna. i cna’t get good fresh fish here and i am reading a good book called ‘bottomfeeder’ about fish and the oceans and the fishing industry. when i am done i will make some diff choices re seafood.
I use a dessicated bovine adrenal supp. and lots o b vitamins. i just don’t want to eat animal protein every meal – it just doesn’t appeal to me, and i have decided to do what appeals, regardless of the sound advice i have read.
one/joy: You are eating well!
Hugs to all!
blondblueeyes/gloria
The snake said to eve, take a bite of this apple, its tasty, its sweet, it looks good.
And there will be no problems. You will always come back for more. you will always want more. You will love it.