A study finds that because narcissists are so comfortable talking about themselves, they often impress people who are interviewing them for jobs.
Read Narcissists often ace job interviews, study finds, on News.Yahoo.com.
Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.
I recently read where a law had been passed that knowing someone’s criminal background was now illegal…because it prevented them from getting jobs. Or if you revealed someone’s criminal background and they lost their job you could be prosecuted.
WTF???? Yea, I know (ex) criminals need jobs too…but I also think that the person who hires them has a right to know that they have a convicted criminal background.
ARREST records where the person is NOT prosecuted or is found not guilty are one thing (though actually I think they should be public record as well) but CONVICTIONS and prison sentences should be available to any employer. I wouldn’t want to hire someone to work in say a nursing home and not know they had an assault record or other violent conviction.
I do see why a person who is of a narcissistic bent would get the job because many times they are glib talkers and like the article says, an interview is a time when you are EXPECTED to talk nicely about your accomplishments and not be “humble” about them because you are trying to show the person doing the interview your good points and they expect you to brag a bit on yourself.
Working with a person who is ONLY a bit narcissistic isn’t too terrible, but we need to keep in mind that while every narcissist isn’t a psychopath, all psychopaths are narcissistic.
I have worked with psychopaths that I was their boss, and I have worked with psychopaths who were my boss, and neither condition is very good. It makes going to work a chore and you get to where you dread to go in….especially if you dont’ have the authority to fire them, which sometimes you don’t even though you are the supervisor.
Fortunately, every time I’ve been under a psychopath’s thumb, I was in a position where I could quit and go some place else. That was always the nice thing about nursing (and still is) is that if you are near a pretty good sized city, there were always MANY available jobs.
I have a friend who is permanently disabled from a couple of strokes and a heart attack. His brother placed in him a facility that specializes in brain-damaged patients and had great promise to be able to help him.
A violent con was a patient at the same facility. He was there because he had brain damage, too, and the prison had nothing for him.
He almost killed my friend one day. He wasn’t supervised. They knew about his background and they left him alone with my friend.
A nurse pulled the guy off my friend otherwise, he would have been dead. This guy was intent on finishing my friend off.
Anyway, my friend went into this facility paralyzed on one side, but he insisted on walking despite the effort it took. He hasn’t walked since this attack. He’s confined to a bed.
My son and I used to take him on short drives because when he could walk and stand, we could move him. Now, he’s dead weight.
In another instance, I was visiting a friend in a long-term care facility. She had a roommate, an elderly woman.
A female nurse’s aide or whatever rushed in the room one day, looked at the elderly woman, and while grabbing hard on her crotch and squeezing, asked, “Are you wearing a diaper? Yup.” The elderly woman winced in shame. Then the nurse aide marched out. I was speechless.
Stupid me, I should have told the nurses’ station what she did, but at the time, I had no idea what to do so I did nothing. I am not proud of that and have regretted it ever since.
Oxy, where was this law passed?
What about all the screenings required by schools and scout groups making sure that no sex offender is hired?
Know what troubles me about this article? The implication that if interviewers have the right skills, they can determine the narcissists in the interviews. All in 15 or 30 minutes?
I need a little advice on Narcissists before I comment on this story.
My brother has always been very Narcissistic and this has been an issue in our relationship. Over the last several years, he has become histrionic and hypochondriac. The last time I saw him, about a month ago, at dinner he began acting out regarding heart palpitations, and various other small maladies that left him in a panic attack.
I took the cognitive approach and mentioned that if he has any history of panic attacks and heart palpitations, he needs to avoid caffeine, alcohol and sugars. This is not the first time I have had this conversation with him and to be honest, I was pretty angry last month.
Today, the same thing happened. I asked him if he had any caffeine (yes but “only one cup…”) alcohol (yes, wine the night before) and I reminded him how bad these are, along with sweets, for anyone with panic problems. I was testy this morning, but calmed down
This evening he was going to drive me home when he said he need to stop in at mom’s “to pick up some chocolate…”
I lost it. Everything is in one ear, out the other with him.
My frustration is compounded by the fact that he has an MS in social work and boasts about his understanding of holistic medicine, and I have had very real, very serious health conditions, including open-heart surgery, and downplay them all. I even told him with his attitude, he could not survive one day of my life given very real and constant skipped beats and arrhythmia’s. Along with occasional chest pain. I did not go into my PTSD induced Cyclothymia from my experience with a sociopathic employer, illegal termination, legal battles and of course the x-spath.
His mentality to find reasons to continue doing something (green tea is good for you, wine relaxes me, chocolate has antioxidants) and I lost it. Not only because in one minute he brags about home informed he is and then dismisses the obvious. Also, after all I have been thru, stiff upper lift, people moaning about anything other than broken bones and blood to me is purely attention seeking.
However, at home now I am being my normal introspective me and feel very bad for getting into an argument with him, even to the point of how much over the years I have caused some of his issues.
BBE,
you already know the answer, I think.
We can’t control other people, we can only control our own behavior. We can’t save them or rescue them either.
It’s ok to give advice just don’t expect him to listen to it.
That said, I would recommend to him that he take more magnesium and potassium. He will be amazed at how much better he feels. Magnesium malate works best.
It’s easier to do something new, than to quit something old.
BBE, Skylar is spot-on. We cannot control what other people think, do, say, or believe.
Having said that, you have known your brother your entire life and he has always behaved the same way even though the behaviors may have escalated and morphed. If it were me (and, I’ve been in such a relationship), I would avoid offering my humble opinion, view, observation, or knowledge at all times. If someone asks for my opinion, I am STILL hesitant to provide it if their track record demonstrates that they’re just talking to hear themselves speak.
I have enough to concern myself with in my own life, and I’d rather speak with people who are open, receptive, and will give back at appropriate times. Wasting my precious time on someone who just wants to hear the wind whistle through their open mouths is not on my agenda. This saves me a WHOLE lot of triggering, anxiety, and opportunities for N’s to minimalize and dismiss me. I don’t want to hear their white noise, and they won’t hear mine.
Brightest blessings, BBE.
Skylar;
Yes, I am going to recommend Magnesium. You are right, for the sake of my mother and oddly for him, I need to not get triggered. I need to recognize that while hypochondria *may* be an attention getting act, is it also a mental illness when it becomes extreme.
Isn’t histrionics a subset of narcissism with hypochondria being part of that?
G1S, it “can” be. There are so many facets to the human psyche that even the “experts” can’t sort it all out. If any of us were to undergo a psych assessment when we made our discoveries, we’d all probably have been institutionalized on the spot.
And, let’s not forget that those making the assessments have their own baggage, prejudices, biases, and get trained in different schools of thought.