If your new romantic interest exhibits all or most of the following behaviors, be careful. He or she might be a sociopath.
1. Charisma and charm. They’re smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting.
2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that.
3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends.
4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch.
5. Blame others. Nothing is ever their fault. They always have an excuse. Someone else causes their problems.
6. Lies and gaps in the story. You ask questions, and the answers are vague. They tell stupid lies. They tell outrageous lies. They lie when they’d make out better telling the truth.
7. Intense eye contact. Call it the predatory stare. If you get a chill down your spine when they look at you, pay attention.
8. Move fast. They quickly proclaim that you’re their true love and soul mate. They want to move in together or get married quickly.
9. Pity play. They appeal to your sympathy. They want you to feel sorry for their abusive childhood, psychotic ex, incurable disease or financial setbacks.
10. Sexual magnetism. If you feel intense attraction, if your physical relationship is unbelievable, it may be their excess testosterone.
For more on this topic, see Donna Andersen’s book, Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 signs you’re dating a sociopath.
MiLo
Kim ~
I just watched too. This woman could be my P daughter’s twin. My Grandson is now 10, we have had some sort of custody since he was 3. Watching the court proceedings make me shake, actually shake. This could have been the fate of my grandson.
OMG
kim frederick
MILO, Did you watch the defenses opening arguments? OMG. Jose Bias went so far as to suggest that Lee Anthony MIGHT be Caylees Bio dad. George was incesting Casey since she was 8, and Caylee drowned in the family pool on June 16, 2008. Wow. What a circus, huh?
one/joy_step_at_a_time
about the new boss that told me he was a reformed narc – i know this may be a question i should know the answer to….ah, actually i do…i was kind of freking out and couldn’t think for a few minutes: the question was: are Ns into power plays and control. one step thinks about n sire and n ex. sigh. her brain returns to normal and she knows that it is so. oh, and blaming others – um, yup.
i am watching him pull something on someone else….oy!
MiLo
Kim ~ Yep, I sure did, and I could have told you what was going to come out of his mouth.
I honestly can’t state enough how much this girl is my P daughter. We were in and out of court with my P at least 6 times over the years, right before each court appearance she would “suggest” some sort of sexual abuse, “suggesting” different family members each time. None were remotely true.
I am sick. I am so afraid that these parents are going to take a fall to save their daughter’s life.
candy
Duped – welcome. Wow! Such a heartfelt, helpful post. Thank you:)
Ox Drover
Dear Duped,
None of us know how long we will live, I may get hit by a car today and die….or I may live for a long time….but at 65 I doubt I am going to live another 40 years! LOL But I am going to make EVERY DAY, every MINUTE, the most enjoyable, the most peaceful and the most comfortable I can make it.
I am going to find joy and peace in my life. I am going to stay away from people who are TOXIC…whether they are psychopathic or not, if they are not honest, good people I will NOT interact with them on an intimate level. That includes my relatives, my son C, my P son, my egg donor, or my X-friends. I am retired so I don’t have to work with these people and so ONLY people that I find kind, good, honest, helpful and enjoyable to be around will be around me. I don’t have a single minute to “waste” being around who are negative influences of my life and my peace.
So don’t focus on “dying” but focus on LIVING EACH DAY. Focus on being happy and loving yourself. God bless.
Back_from_the_edge
Thank you Candy for the nice welcome.
Happy and honored to be here, actually. 🙂
Thanks to Donna’s strength and courage, we finally have a place to meet and share and not be afraid any longer. 🙂
People such as ourselves have a difficult time finding a place to ‘fit in’ after such a horrid experience as we have had, dealing with spaths in our lives. It is an entirely different world and the internet has only increased the prevelance of such things.
It is my position that these kinds of things that take place on the internet should be legally controlled to protect vulnerable, nice people such as ourselves from unscrupulous people.
I have found that you can do a ‘light’ search on the internet of anyone you wish. Sometimes they can find your name, address, birthdate, and hold on: they can get a front street view of where you LIVE. That is right; I said:
A FRONT VIEW OF WHERE YOU LIVE along with a map giving directions. These kinds of things are in direction violation of our laws of protection and anonymity.
So, since the law won’t protect us, I have some tips that I think you may want to think about:
1. Do NOT register on any dating sites.
2. Be careful where you go on the internet and what you say.
(A lot of times you will post something that goes viral, with or without your knowledge and spaths may have you on their ‘check for’ list.)
3. Do not go out alone. Do not make yourself vulnerable.
Remember: spaths have instantaneous tempers and cannot control them. They like to hit and throw things and splash about like a child having a tantrum.
4. Safeguard your safety at all times but do not let it become an obsession. Make your local authorities aware of the situation so that when you do call they will understand what is going on.
5. BY NO MEANS COMMUNICATE WITH SPATH EVER AGAIN.
They thrive on the ‘rise’ and ‘attention’ they get from you.
That is an ‘ego booster’ to them. Since they are so unpredictable, it is best to get far, far, far, away. They are a time bomb that will eventually explode and you do not want to be anywhere around them when they do. Do not make yourself a focus point for them.
Clean up your internet footprints and throw it all in a trash bag and dump it in the dumpster, Ladies (and Gentlemen)…
There is more than a lot to be said for the ‘old fashioned’ way of meeting. Direct contact is 95 percent of the attraction anyways, in reality. 🙂 THINK ABOUT IT.
Happy Day to you all.
Back_from_the_edge
“It is better to be alone for a GOOD REASON than to be with someone for the WRONG REASON.”
Back_from_the_edge
Thank you ox for the words of encouragement. 🙂 xxoo
I am tired, My Friend. My body is showing my age and I am trying desperately to make the very best of it that I possibly can. I wish you nothing but joy and happiness, ox.
DUPED
Ox Drover
Dear Duped,
Well, I’m wearing out too—turn 65 this year—but working on staying as healthy as I can and feeling as well as I can both mentally and physically.
I think that is all any of us can do at any age….no guarantees in this life, or how long it will last, but I intend to live every minute of it! Glad you are here, Duped! Sounds like in spite of the problems you’ve had, you’re like me a “tough old bird”! LOL (((hugs)))