If your new romantic interest exhibits all or most of the following behaviors, be careful. He or she might be a sociopath.
1. Charisma and charm. They’re smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting.
2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that.
3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends.
4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch.
5. Blame others. Nothing is ever their fault. They always have an excuse. Someone else causes their problems.
6. Lies and gaps in the story. You ask questions, and the answers are vague. They tell stupid lies. They tell outrageous lies. They lie when they’d make out better telling the truth.
7. Intense eye contact. Call it the predatory stare. If you get a chill down your spine when they look at you, pay attention.
8. Move fast. They quickly proclaim that you’re their true love and soul mate. They want to move in together or get married quickly.
9. Pity play. They appeal to your sympathy. They want you to feel sorry for their abusive childhood, psychotic ex, incurable disease or financial setbacks.
10. Sexual magnetism. If you feel intense attraction, if your physical relationship is unbelievable, it may be their excess testosterone.
For more on this topic, see Donna Andersen’s book, Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 signs you’re dating a sociopath.
kim – it sounds like some things that i have experienced in my legs and feet. in my case it is a nerve issue, caused by lower back misalignment, sciatica and the degrading of the the sheath around my nerves.
nola – there are online keyboarding tests and lessons too!
Good for you, nola. You are handling it in a very healthy way. Just pick yourself up and try it again. You’ll nail it, next time.
This is kind of cool. my daughter called this morning, and told me this story. She used to be a flight attendant and last year She and her best friend went to the South of France on vacation.
She said that the last week she had been wanting to return and had been thinking more and more about it. She and her BF were considering it and looking into prices and such, wondering if they could afford it. Finally she decided that they couldn’t go this year, but maybe next.
In Church on Sunday, she was praying for the usual, family members and such, and she thought about praying for her wish to come true, to be able to go to France, but she admonished herself and thought it bad to ask for something frivolous like a trip to France…then she heard an inner voice that told her it was ok to bring her all to God, even her wishes and desires, at that moment she turned to her BF and told him, We are going to France.
The next day a couple visiting our area from New Jersey walked into her real-estat office and talked to her about buying a house. The lady spoke with an accent and my D asked where she was from. From the South of France. They chatted and D told her that she had been there in the past, and so hoped that she would be able to go back soon. She showed them property and they went back to New Jersey.
The next day they called back and told her they wished to buy one of the properties. (400,000 dollars in cash.) Then the lady told my D that she was willing to let her and BF stay in their apartment because she really wanted her to be able to go. Within an hour she e-mailed photos of the apartment, along with a map and directions.
Later that day D ran into a fellow flight attendant who said she had heard that D had quit flying and was sad about it, then she said, “Well if you ever need buddy passes just let me know…..So, needless to say, she jumped on that and SHE”S GOING TO FRANCE.
I guess God was trying to teach her that it’s okay to ask for a wish to come true. 🙂
Wow Kim,
so nice, thanks for sharing that.
Nola – Don’t let it put a downer on you. There are good typing skill programs on-line. I just did a test myself! It’s fun. How many words can you type in a minute? If you practice each day, and make it fun, it’s surprising how it can improve your speed. Don’t give up trying:)
Kim,
Your symptoms could very well be caused by sciatica as one-step mentioned. Though I believe trauma is absolutely held in the body, usually electrical, tingly feelings are caused by nerve entrapment. Contributing factors are: the force of gravity – sitting or standing for long periods of time; carrying extra weight; bending or twisting your back improperly, lack of stretching over time, etc. If you have the resources, you could try finding a really good neuromuscular therapist. They could do some muscle testing on you and also work all of the muscles that contribute to it. I always recommend this before going to a doctor, because all doctors know how to do is cut, give shots, and give drugs. That should be a very last resort.
nola, there are internetgames to learn you to speed up your typing. You don’t need to pay for a course.
http://behendigheid.leukespellen.be/snel-typen-spelletjes.html
this is a link to one that I find the best for adults or late teens. Watch out though, it’s a game that gets you anxious. My personal record is a score of 115-120 somewhere, meaning lvl 11-12. I had one pupil only so far who beat me to it. It’s a dutch version though… google fast typing games, and you may find something similar in English. Anyway, there are free resources out there to make you exercise typing blindly and against a timer.
“grounding”….good point, darwinsmom……
In this stage of “my” recovery, ‘grounding’ exercises are essential. If you continue to sit there in your dark and deep depression, you will just always remain in a ‘stagnate’ state. Still being the victim of the spath. Our point is to be free from their vileness; correct? We already know we are never going to ‘change’ them. Not with love; force nor threat. They are what they are and will never be different. We want to pray and HOPE that everytime we ‘forgive’ and offer that second chance and third and fourth and fifth and sixth…we want to BELIEVE in it but it’s only a ploy.
Now that we KNOW the personality and what we REALLY have been through – where do we go from here?
Have you thought about it?
We have to think about where are we going to redirect all of these attentions we are wasting on a person who just won’t ever ‘get it’? We are not going to just sit here and blog our lives away; right? Where do we go from here?
True healing will come from stepping outside the box and facing all of our fears, inadequate feelings, hurt, deep, deep, deep hurt….and then putting it all aside as another distant memory. If we don’t attempt THAT, the spath has had his ultimate victory….taking even our moment to moment thoughts. Complete control. They are NOT worth wasting this precious life on. I am sorry but it’s true.
I wish you all nothing but peace and light.
🙂 I wrote myself a ‘bucket list’ and am scratching them off one at a time. The longer I live, (I cheat on my list), I keep adding to the bottom. hahahaha
I figure like this, I will never GET to the bottom and maybe it will make me stick around a little longer with anticipation! 🙂
Happy weekend to all.
DUPED
Thanks for the info. I panicking now though because I’m afraid these two nursing agencies are not going to be able to supply the work that I need. I already told my landlord that the rent won’t be on time and I’m scared I won’t be able to pay it. I’m just feeling down about nobody calling me back for jobs and I can’t understand why someone with my credentials gets NO RESPONSE for any interviews.