How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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If your new romantic interest exhibits all or most of the following behaviors, be careful. He or she might be a sociopath.

1. Charisma and charm. They’re smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting.

2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that.

3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends.

4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch.

5. Blame others. Nothing is ever their fault. They always have an excuse. Someone else causes their problems.

6. Lies and gaps in the story. You ask questions, and the answers are vague. They tell stupid lies. They tell outrageous lies. They lie when they’d make out better telling the truth.

7. Intense eye contact. Call it the predatory stare. If you get a chill down your spine when they look at you, pay attention.

8. Move fast. They quickly proclaim that you’re their true love and soul mate. They want to move in together or get married quickly.

9. Pity play. They appeal to your sympathy. They want you to feel sorry for their abusive childhood, psychotic ex, incurable disease or financial setbacks.

10. Sexual magnetism. If you feel intense attraction, if your physical relationship is unbelievable, it may be their excess testosterone.

For more on this topic, see Donna Andersen’s book, Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 signs you’re dating a sociopath.

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Comments

  1. one/joy_step_at_a_time

    omg sky, don’t let my spath find out about this, this is the next best faked career EVAH!

    she’d be all over this like white on rice! or spath on shit, or whatevah.

    almost makes ME want to use it to con somebody. 🙂
    I have always said: weird hides odd! if the spath can make the ‘real’ story waaaaay out there, then the oddness of the spath doesn’t show as readily.

  2. Ox Drover

    Sky, Okay, I see what you mean….yea, my husband used to do some of that stuff in strawberry fields where they would spray water over the berries and then take a helicopter and fly over it so that it would coat the underside of the leaves because the wind would whip the leaves around…to keep it from freezing….but it wasn’t weeks of “waiting” it might have been hours…even back in those days in the 50s and early 60s he was making $100 an HOUR when most folks were getting $50-100 a WEEK, so they didn’t pay him a lot of “wait” time. LOL

  3. behind_blue_eyes

    One;

    “Weird hides odd.”

    How apt. The word that comes to mind most when describing some of my x-spath’s behavior was “quirky.”

    In retrospect I learned his quirky behaviors hide various truths. Its very interesting that he (they?) resort to drama when more simple measures would suffice.

  5. Louise

    BBE:

    I don’t think we on here are spaths because we are negative about what happened to us, BUT…I can say that my X spath never had a good thing to say about anyone! So it makes perfect sense when it comes to him.

  7. Recovering

    WOW SKY….Well I am glad you are still here with us. One thing about it…after everything that I have learned, I still feel a little love for the (false person) but there is no way there could be another go round. I think I would be too scared. After gainign knowledge; scared to eat, scared to meet him alone, scared of sex (i learned he is very loose with sex)…GEESH.

    I was also looking at some old pics and I noticed he stands out. There is one photo in particular taken with a group of his friends (allies) and he even looks crazy on the picture. His eyes look large and piercing. No one else in the photo looks that way but him. Hmmmm, maybe this is another clue? If someone stands out or just doesnt look normal in a photo, dont bother!

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