If your new romantic interest exhibits all or most of the following behaviors, be careful. He or she might be a sociopath.
1. Charisma and charm. They’re smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting.
2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that.
3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends.
4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch.
5. Blame others. Nothing is ever their fault. They always have an excuse. Someone else causes their problems.
6. Lies and gaps in the story. You ask questions, and the answers are vague. They tell stupid lies. They tell outrageous lies. They lie when they’d make out better telling the truth.
7. Intense eye contact. Call it the predatory stare. If you get a chill down your spine when they look at you, pay attention.
8. Move fast. They quickly proclaim that you’re their true love and soul mate. They want to move in together or get married quickly.
9. Pity play. They appeal to your sympathy. They want you to feel sorry for their abusive childhood, psychotic ex, incurable disease or financial setbacks.
10. Sexual magnetism. If you feel intense attraction, if your physical relationship is unbelievable, it may be their excess testosterone.
For more on this topic, see Donna Andersen’s book, Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 signs you’re dating a sociopath.
Recovering,
Research has shown that psychopaths are at a higher risk of ADHD as well as Bi-polar and also left handedness than the average person. Not all psychopaths are ADHD and not all are bi-polar, but some are ALL THREE and left handed as well. I know one personally (professionally diagnosed ex convict) who is all 4 things. My psychopathic son, Patrick, is left handed but not ADHD and as far as I know he isn’t bi-polar, but he could show signs of that and me not know because he has been out of my home since he was 17 and I’ve only spent some hours with him visiting in the 20+ years since then in prison visiting room.
My other son C is very ADHD but not a psychopath.
Dr. Leedom has written some comments about the ADHD/Bi-polar and PPD genetic tendencies, and some of the behavior for all 3 of the items “over laps” at times and it would be difficult to distinguish which came from which disorder. Many people with bi-polar may act in some “spathy” ways when they are manic, but be perfectly “normal” when they are not manic,, but having one disorder doesn’t preclude having 1 or 2 more as well. Then if you factor in the environmental components –maybe being raised by an abusive psychopathic parent or two–the outcome can be terrible.
Why is Charisma and charm #1 on this list. Some of us look for someone who possesses these qualities. Not sure I agree that it is a tipoff that they are a sociopath
One that I have found for a woman dating a guy is if your date shakes another guys hand so hard that he tries to crush it. Your date has insecurity issues and is trying to demonstrate his value. Run
dear speed dating – you are promoting a dating website. your posts have been marked as spam now.
oh my – where is the spathinator at – isnt she taking names and wearing the skillet hat while the Ox is jumpin her mules over pea valley?
One/Joy *laugh n snort* that was fast. Nothing a rock cannot solve.
LOL!
Hens!! you killlllll me.
I had a busy day today, looking for a renter for the cabin and went to a diamond way meditation.
You guys are sooooooo on the ball.
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that’s the great thing about cruising in and out – catch all kinds of things. 🙂
Hello, hello…Im back and with a new name 🙂 Some of you may remember my story about my psychopath ex and the motorcycle and comcast bill, etc. I used to be robxsykobabe…had to do lots of changing 🙂
So, I was thinking the other day about the journey and realized I could use a little more support around this time of the year. So, here I am…
I believe the last time I wrote was in around May of 2011. The psychopath and I had broken up and he left without paying any bills…ok…well, he contacted me again in July of 2011 with the EXACT same song and dance of I am his true love, hes been miserable without me, I was his soulmate, yada yada yada…I didnt respond.
He was on a dating website I was on and used profile pictures of times when he and I were together, even going so far as to post a picture of MY dog as a puppy and him!!!! I could have thrown up. His “profile” was all about, well, ME and how hes never known love like me before and how he is waisting his time on the sites because he will only love me, etc.
So, I ignore him…and he texts me in about October telling me I was lucky he even thought about me still and then proceeded to blame me for random things, even going so far as to say I was abusive to him last December…in the middle of my grandmothers death. Granted, I was not myself during that time and could have handled things MUCH better, although who in the hell is HE to tell ME I was abusive…uhhh, yeah.
He contacted me again recently to tell me hes not ‘as enthusiastic’ about us as he used to be. I did respond to that…with ‘ok’. He must have been sorta floored because he responded with ‘ok?’ I said something along the lines of “youre not entusiastic about ‘us’, fine. Do you think Im going to do a tapdance with a tophat on to gain your enthusiasm? Probably not.” He wanted to talk later that night. We didnt talk and the NEXT DAY when he called, I didnt answer but texted him ‘thank you for calling and leaving a message. I wont be home until late Sunday night.” He IMMEDIATELY responded with ‘youre gone?” I said “yup” (now, whether or not I really was is a different story-he he). He said “cool…have fun, take care.”
I took this to mean he was done trying to talk to me…oh, I was wrong. He texted me today and talked about how much of a wonderful woman I am and how hes never known any love as much as he has with me. He doesnt think we are good for each other though and we havent been for a long time.
My response? “Ok”
He proceeded to thank me for lots of memories and asked that I mail him any of his belongings (from last year), and hed pay me for shipping.
My response? “Ok”
Him…”Thanks”
Opinions on this one…anyone, anyone???!!!!
One more thing…(you guys and girls know how infamous I am for those ‘one more things’)…
I found his biological mother for him about a year and a half ago. Well, this is some s*%^! So, she discards me when we broke up last year because, well, I was ‘just a girlfriend’-coming from a lady who, at that time, had known her ‘son’ for about oh, 8 months! So, as we were broken up longer and longer, and after he contacted me, it became apparent to me that SHE was now his source of supply and had taken MY place! He calls her ‘mom’ and refers to the people he hardly knows as ‘my other family’. Well, hes developed a VERY ‘close’ relationship with this ‘mom’ he hardly knows…and who hardly knows him. He said to me ‘I dont even really care too much to see (his ‘mom’), I really just like hanging out with my brother when I go up there!”
Voila! She’s already becoming ‘old news’ before she even realizes it! And hes just as blatant about using her as ever…yet, he doesnt even know hes telling on himself!