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Archives for July 2012

You are here: Home / 2012 / Archives for July 2012

New Lovefraud author to detail her child custody battle with a sociopath

July 31, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  9 Comments

Lovefraud's newest contributor is living the nightmare scenario. She met someone who she thought was a talented, successful businessman, because that's what he told her, and that's how he behaved. This man promised to make her dreams of a loving family come true. She had a child with him—and a few days after she gave birth, she fled with her infant, fearing for her life. This woman believes the father of her child is a dangerous psychopath. The woman is writing under the pen name of "Cappuccino Queen." She cannot be identified. She's already received death threats. She needs to stay alive to protect her child. She is truly worried, because at least one woman who was involved with the m …

New Lovefraud author to detail her child custody battle with a sociopathRead More

Category: Laws and courts, Sociopaths and family

Our Silence Is Their Greatest Weapon

July 31, 2012 //  by Mel Carnegie//  9 Comments

This week I'd like to tell you a true story — although details have been changed to protect privacy. It concerns a recent dinner conversation I had with a well-balanced, well-educated, professional gentleman who has worked at the same company for over a decade. Why? Because he believes in what they do, he loves his job, and he loves the people who work there. This man is articulate, intelligent, great company, happily married and by any measure has made a success of his life — I'll call him James. So, you can imagine my surprise when, in a quiet moment, this strong man took me aside to confide in me about the horrors he had suffered at the hands of a female boss who had recently left the bus …

Our Silence Is Their Greatest WeaponRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath, Workplace sociopaths

After the sociopath, make the decision to recover

July 30, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  658 Comments

Finally, you realize what is wrong with your romantic partner: He or she is a sociopath. Finally, the behavior that was so confusing makes sense. The person you loved, and who you thought loved you, has a personality disorder. Now you realize that anything your partner told you could have been a lie. Now you know why your partner could be so cruel, then tell you how much he or she loved you, practically in the same breath. Now you realize that there never was any love, that your entire relationship was exploitation, and nothing more. Now what do you do? How do you move forward? How do you recover? Many of your friends and family tell you, "Just put it behind you. Get over it. Move …

After the sociopath, make the decision to recoverRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: 30 years married to a sociopath

July 29, 2012 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  28 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was sent by the reader who posts as Opal Rose. July 24, 2012, was my 30th wedding anniversary. I found the Lovefraud web site in August 2009 after finding a directory on my computer put there by my husband while his computer was being repaired. Unbelievable and worse than I could have ever imagined — porn, violence-against-women-porn, sex dating sites for college age women, e-mails to specific responders to ads. The dude was busy. A frantic visit to my workplace Employee Assistance Program gave me the concept of “Narcissistic Personality Disorder,” but subsequent searches led me to the checklist for “Sociopath.” I distinctly remember my jaw dropping whe …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: 30 years married to a sociopathRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Recovery from a sociopath, Seduced by a sociopath

Amara, Sophie and Cecilia

Honoring the memory of Amara, Sophie and Cecilia

July 28, 2012 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  39 Comments

It has been interesting to listen to the pundits trying to explain why someone would declare war on those in a theater and open fire. One said, "most of the time these acts are not committed by sociopaths” and asserted that most of the shooters are “depressed.” Many other pundits have said the shooter is obviously without conscience and have described him as “a psychopath.” I bring up these issues because of another story that received very little coverage because it was eclipsed by the horrific events in Colorado. Today I would like to honor the memory of Amara, Sophie and Cecilia, three little ones whose only crime was having a monster as a father. Amara, Sophie and Cecilia …

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Category: Sociopaths and family

Lovefraud Lesson #5: When sociopaths pretend to be your sudden soul mate

July 27, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  26 Comments

Perhaps, deep in our hearts, we always believed in "love at first sight." Then we met that person who seemed to be everything we ever wanted, and who felt the same way about us. It's destiny! We're soul mates! If this is what you're hearing, you may need to watch the newest Lovefraud video. …

Lovefraud Lesson #5: When sociopaths pretend to be your sudden soul mateRead More

Category: Seduced by a sociopath

How our thoughts affect our lives

July 27, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  41 Comments

By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired)  “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.”  (Proverbs 23:7) I was watching the movie Iron Lady today and a few lines of the character Margaret Thatcher jumped out at me and made me think of that verse above from the Bible. Here are the lines from Mrs. Thatcher, as she was speaking with her physician. Watch your thoughts for they become words, Watch your words for they become your actions, Watch your actions For they become  your habits Watch your habits for they become your character Watch your character for it becomes your destiny What we think we become. How many times do we prove those words, originally attributed to the ancient Chine …

How our thoughts affect our livesRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath

When is enough, enough?

July 26, 2012 //  by Linda Hartoonian Almas//  61 Comments

The only constant in life is that very little remains constant.  None of us know exactly what our futures hold.  This is true for everyone, regarding most aspects of life.  However, when recovering from relationships with psychopathic individuals or those with psychopathic features, it is an especially important concept for us to understand. Why?  The reality is that sometimes they like to hold on to us.  While the notion seems to defy logic, it is extremely common.  As a result, we must be ready for what this brings, so that we do not allow them to get the best of us or hinder our recoveries.  Their inabilities to release us can rapidly turn bizarre and cause significant harm, emotional o …

When is enough, enough?Read More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

Real Love After The Sociopath

July 24, 2012 //  by Mel Carnegie//  75 Comments

I don't remember the number of times that my friends warned me not to shut down after it all happened. How many times they'd ask me not to lose myself. To avoid becoming bitter and lonely. To stay open, despite my pain. “With what you've been through you have every right to never trust anyone again” they'd say “but please don't let this experience change you from being the loving bubbly person that you are — time will heal. Stay open” Yes, I am very lucky indeed to have such wise and loving friends. I count my blessings and am grateful for such levels of support — particularly during the early days after discovering the truth.  At the time I thought they were referring to my ability to …

Real Love After The SociopathRead More

Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Many shades of bad behavior

July 23, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  98 Comments

Last month I was in a law firm. Not because of a legal issue—I was there to discuss writing the content for their new websites. Two lawyers, who had been part of one firm, were setting up independent practices. One lawyer hired me. The other wasn't sure, so he wanted to meet me. A week later I learned that the second lawyer decided he would write his website himself. On Saturday, I was shocked to see a story in the local newspaper: The second lawyer, Seth A. Fuscellaro, who was also a public defender in Lower Township, New Jersey, was charged in a $15 million mortgage fraud scheme. The FBI actually arrested him in municipal court and escorted him out in handcuffs. The lawyer was one of …

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Category: Explaining the sociopath

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