Archive for September, 2014

He does not know how to tell the truth — he lies just to lie

Spath TalesEditor’s Note: This SPATH story was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name of “Lauren2014.”

I opened my home, soul and heart to someone who had a ”past.” He was able to pull at my heartstrings and tell me horrific stories of his childhood and terrible accounts of his upbringing so that I would feel sorry for him.

I was willing to overlook his “past” and the bad decisions he made as an adult because I felt it was attributed to his childhood. (Most of which are lies.) I thought every word he told me was the truth.

He has no remorse for the complete fraud he was to me and our children

Spath TalesEditor’s Note: This SPATH story was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name of  “Beverly2014.”

I have told this story so many times and feel like no matter how much I discuss it I could never tell it all because there are so many details and incidents that occurred that it would be exhausting and somewhat impossible.

I met my Sociopath about two years after my divorce from my first marriage which was abusive in its own way.

My Socio preyed on my vulnerability and used it against me.

“It’s done. I’ve killed them.”

dancing sisters

Indianna 3, and Savannah, 4 were smothered to death by their father.

On Easter Sunday, 2014, 36-year-old Charles Amon Mihayo, of Melbourne, Australia, went to the home of his estranged partner’s parents, where he had made arrangements to see his two daughters, Indianna, three, and Savannah, four years old.

He dressed the girls in pretty ballerina dresses that he had bought earlier that day, and had them do a dance in the back yard for their mother and grand parents. Then he brought the girls inside, locked the doors, video recorded them dancing again, and then smothered them to death while their mother and grandparents were locked out.

Study shows family dinners are good for teens’ mental health

Emotional young blondeA recent study published in the JAMA Pediatrics journal discovered that among teenagers, online bullying (or cyber bullying) is now a bigger problem than face-to-face harassment.

More than 20,000 adolescents were measured for their exposure to bullying. Those who had high exposure to cyber bullying also had higher incidents of emotional, behavioral and substance-use problems.

According to the study, regular family dinners are good for teenagers’ mental health, helping to tackle the problem of cyber bullying.

The study’s lead author, Frank Elgar, a professor in the Department of Psychiatry at McGill University’s Faculty of Medicine in Canada, concluded that regular family meal times benefit adolescents’ well-being — regardless of whether or not they feel they can easily talk to their parents.

Hooked by a sociopath – again

bigstock-Protect-your-heart-sizedA week ago, a Lovefraud reader returned.

She first wrote to Lovefraud in 2008, as she was scrambling to get away from a man who she thought was her true love, but turned out to be a sociopath.

She read Lovefraud articles and posted comments for a couple of years, and then moved on.

Until a week ago, when she sent me an email with the subject line, “I’m back.” She’d become involved with another sociopath.

“How could I be so stupid?” she wrote. “And this time is much much much much worse than the last.”

Another sociopath

I was bowled over; I really thought the guy was in love with me

Spath TalesEditor’s Note: This SPATH story was submitted by a Lovefraud reader who goes by the name “Mary2014”.

I first met J when he came to fit a new door.

I had recently moved house and was feeling a bit overwhelmed by the amount of work to be done. He was extremely polite and well mannered and appeared to be attentive to my specific needs. He visited regularly bringing catalogues to choose doors, glass, etc., and seemed very keen to make sure that I was happy with the work he did.

My sociopathic boyfriend went from idealizing me to neglecting me

Editor’s Note: This SPATH TALE was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we’ll call “Kathleen Jones.”

Spath TalesI dated a sociopath for two years before I found out what he was.

We met on an online dating site.

He mirrored my shyness and interests. I was smitten with him right away. He was not pushy, but patient, and soon we were a couple.

After three months of bliss, he would start arguments with me over nothing, but would manipulate me by crying and lying so that I always thought I was in the wrong.

My narcissistic father made it no secret that he preferred my siblings over me

Spath TalesEditor’s Note: This SPATH story was submitted by Lovefraud reader “Isis2014”

My father displays behaviors that are consistent with narcissistic personality disorder. He was emotionally abusive and neglectful to my mother, my siblings and me.

He and my mother were married for 28 years.

Months before their 28th anniversary, my mother discovered that my father had a 25 year old daughter. She is three weeks younger than my parent’s second child. He hid his daughter’s existence for 25 years. No one knew about her, not even his own parents.

If Psychopaths Were Identified

If psychopaths were actively identified across institutions,

we would more consistently know exactly who we’re dealing with.

Their stats on getting away with murder would go (way) down.

They would be less likely to win full custody in divorce.

There would be more public awareness around who’s running certain companies.

And our public and professional belief that interactional assessments and background checks tell us all we need to know about a person

would be turned on its head

to the benefit of all involved.

If psychopaths were identified consistently and accurately

by all mental health professionals

Rotherham, England sexual abuse report reveals 1,400 victims


Professor Alexis Jay, a former chief inspector of social work.

In the aftermath of allegations of gang rape and trafficking in the town of Rotherham, England, the Borough Council commissioned Professor Alexis Jay, a former chief inspector of social work, to do an independent inquiry into the allegations.

Jay’s findings were similar to three other reports conducted previously, which concluded the abuse went on but was covered up. Jay said police and local council were indifferent to what was happening under their noses. On a number of occasions, she reported, victims of sexual abuse were criminalized — while their abusers continued to act with impunity. People looked the other way out of fear of being accused of racism.

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