I wrote an article not long ago about settling on a name for the personality disorder that we spend our time here talking about. I suggested using “sociopath” as a general term for exploitative people. Many of us have taken to shortening this term to “spath.”
Well, a Lovefraud reader “Justdreamin” informs us that “spath” is taken. She saw it on a flower pot, and sent us the photos.
It turns out that “spath” is a shortened version of “spathiphyllum,” which is the botanical name for the peace lilly, a common houseplant.
We might have to come up with a new name. If I were a beautiful peace lily, I wouldn’t want to share a name with the nasty predators.
lesson learned
Claudia,
He was the one that recommended that I check out the therapists that my insurance will cover. The ones that he thought were really good in the field that would be important to me are in private practice and do not accept my state run insurance. Just as he is going to do.
My insurance only covers low income venues. “Companies” that offer therapy. I’m not suggesting their not adequate, as I found my therapist that way, ironically, through my son, but when they’re THAT good, they don’t have a tendency to stay in state run offices. Can’t blame them.
LL
geminigirl
One, maybe you could offer to Dogsit the dog at night, it would prob just curl up on your bed,-it would love you and be so grateful for the company, and maybe be a good watch dog too!
You could suggest the dog may be lonely, say how much you love dogs, etc, owner may agree. lateral thinking??
Whatya think?You get peace, dog is happy and comforted, you get a proper nights sleep, every ones a winner!
Love,
GemXX
Claudia
LL, it’s terrible that health insurance narrows your options this way. At any rate, you’re right not to settle just because a therapist is covered by insurance. If he or she can’t help you, it doesn’t matter if they’re free for you. But you may luck out and find a good one. I really hope so.
Stargazer
I finally read this article and LOL’d! I think I’ll get me one of these spath plants for the green belt in front of my condo. The landscaping here consists of a lot of gray rocks. I think a spath will go perfectly with all the GRAY ROCKs! What do you guys think?
kim frederick
Great idea, Star.
kim frederick
LF gang, I need a little encouragement. I am feeling a little blue and just generally stuck. I need to make big changes, but can’t seem to motivate myself to do it.
It’s good that I am over three years out of last horrendous relationship, and that I have taken that time to heal and introspect, but I need to heal my life. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even possible.
I spend my days with the toddlers, and interacting with you all, and then I go home to my little house, and stare at the TV. I have Pinky-doodle, and he comforts me….but I need a life.
I have schedualled several hours of volunteer work over Spring break, and I’m hoping that will help. The weather is good and I can ride my bike…good excercise and good for releasing endorphins (the feel-good hormone).
June is coming quickly, and I will be out of a job…that is scarey and stress inducing, but, the truth is, staying with the toddlers all day hasn’t really moved my life forward in any way. ( I am grateful that I had the opportunity to get really close to the, though.)
I’m usually ready to get home to Pinky-doodle and reasonably content to watch the tube til bed-time, but the past couple of days, when I think of going home, I get a sinking feeling in my gut. I’m so lonely.
I’ve been getting in touch with a lot of deep stuff lately, and I wonder if my these over-all feelings are related to that? I am kind of resisting an urge to back off from all that stuff. I don’t know. I just feel funky and unmotivated and scared and funky.
Any suggestions? I think I just need some encouragement.
I’ve been pretty hard on myself lately, too. I never used to be afraid of people. I didn’t used to harber the idea that people wouldn’t like me…I felt likable and worthy of friendship….but something has changed in that department. I have become afraid of people and rejection…I don’t trust people to like me, so now I resign myself to being alone.
I went so far down with spath I’m not sure I’ll ever recover. 🙁
kim frederick
I need to get back on track, spiritually, too. I’ve slipped a lot, and need to consciously build my faith. I know that will make a big difference.
kim frederick
I found this today about soul, and spiritually healing after trauma. I haven’t finished it yet, (it’s long) but thought I’d share with anyone who is searching.
http://www.thefreelibrary.com/soulmigrations:+traumatic+and+spiritual-a0145682142
I hope the link works. I had to hand enter it.
KatyDid
Kim,
The anxiety you describe could be a symptom of depression.
As a person who condemned myself as LAZY when I could not find the motivation to re-engage in life after leaving my spath… your post reminds me that the only solution I could find that changed things for me was a prescription of anti anxiety med. Turns out my brain chemistry was off and I needed that kind of help to turn it back on.
Maybe you need the same? When depressed, it’s hard to realize we’re depressed, esp if we’re not suicidal! (the easiest recognizable symptom of depression)
ps That link you provided, Soul Migrations, is FANTASTIC, a diamond, a zenith point. Wow. Thank you.
kim frederick
Katy, I had excellent results with both Prosac and Paxil, in the past. I have never considered anti-anxiety meds cause I never thought I was particularly anxious, but I think I’ll make an apt and discuss it with a Dr. I do feel a bit depressed, but it isn’t anywhere near as bad as it’s been in the past. Maybe that’s why I haven’t identified it as depression. I’m not profoundly sad, just resigned and a little lacking in hope for anything better. And, as I said before a real lack of motivation. Being with Spath for 7 years, emotional trauma, financial insecurity, a sence of powerlessness, and self-doubt has really done a number on my self-esteem, too.
Thanks, Katydid