I wrote an article not long ago about settling on a name for the personality disorder that we spend our time here talking about. I suggested using “sociopath” as a general term for exploitative people. Many of us have taken to shortening this term to “spath.”
Well, a Lovefraud reader “Justdreamin” informs us that “spath” is taken. She saw it on a flower pot, and sent us the photos.
It turns out that “spath” is a shortened version of “spathiphyllum,” which is the botanical name for the peace lilly, a common houseplant.
We might have to come up with a new name. If I were a beautiful peace lily, I wouldn’t want to share a name with the nasty predators.
super chic
kim, I don’t think they suffer. I think they are like sharks.
I think you’re right, if their con if working, they are happy.
If it’s not working, they are thinking about their next con.
I am glad you are doing some volunteer work.
I also started volunteering about a year ago.
Have made a few friends,
but I only see them there.
I’m working now, the people are nice, and it’s good for me
to be busy and to get out of the house.
I have gf’s now that want to go out and do things (clubs)
I have to force myself to go, I’m so used to the isolation.
Sometimes when I’m out and about I feel anxious to get home.
I worry about getting home. I don’t think this is a good thing.
super chic
hens, I find myself comparing every man to my X.
Like… I’m looking for him, but of course it can’t be him,
it would have to be a real, true, honest, compassionate person.
I don’t think this is a good thing either!!!!!!
kim frederick
Maybe the club scene is just not your cup of tea. What is it you really like to do?
super chic
I have decided that happiness is a series of perfect moments.
Some moments last for a few minutes and some last for a few days.
I have stopped sitting around wondering when I’m going to be happy,
instead, I look forward to time spent with family and friends,
or hearing a great song on the car radio and rolling down all of the windows
and letting my hair blow in the breeze while I sing!
Stuff like that, it comes in small doses!!!
super chic
The club scene is not really my cup of tea,
I mainly go just to get out of the house and enjoy my
friends and the music.
Once I get there I have fun.
What I really like to do is sit in front of the TV!!
hahahahaha,
oh well, I’ve got to go to work….
Ox Drover
Dear Petite,
The “I love you, but I’m not IN love with you” is like saying I like you as a friend, but I do not want to spent my life with you,” or “I like to sleep with you, but I just don’t want a relationship”
You can “love” ice cream, or you can “love” your dog or you can “love” your child, or “love” your spouse but it is all not the same meaning, just the same “word” with different meanings, but the problem is the psychopath is UNABLE TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. To them it only means I OWN YOU, or I WANT something from you, but it does NOT mean like a normal person would mean that “I FEEL something” toward you KINDLY CONCERN, specialness, uniqueness, like I feel for no other.
They just don’t have the FEELINGS to go with the words.
Have fun in Sydney. Love Oxy!
Stargazer
Hey everyone, I just had a long awaited energy work session this morning. He told me a lot of the fear and negativity I experience is what I absorbed from my stepfather in my childhood. My stepfather was a very bad person. He was apparently abused himself as a child and was like a 7 year old in an adult body taking out all of his anger on His step kids. I absorbed all of it, and the energy worker helped me let some of it go and break the subconscious contracts I made with my stepfather. I definitely feel a little more grounded and lighter, though still feel blocked. He said it would take a few days to process all the stuff, but he feels very confident that I will. I think this is similar to the work Geminigirl has been doing with her energy worker. It seems to help, but dang, this stuff ain’t cheap! He himself is loner like me who was also abused as a child. It really helped me to feel like I’m not so alone, being someone whose path has been to have no family. I cried a lot in the session and sometimes I didn’t even know why I was crying. It just all seemed like release of some sort.
Meantime, I signed up for my second accelerated Spanish class to start next week. I have found a passion to throw myself into, and it is learning that language. I have study groups planned, and the Costa Rica trip coming up where I can practice. I’m pretty excited about all of it. It’s also been fun making new friends in the class. We all seem to have the love of travel in common, and they are all very interesting and happy people. It’s a good balance from all the catty secretaries at work and massage clients whom I can’t open up too much with because they are my clients. I did comment to the energy worker that over the years the type of clients I attract are more evolved and high-energy, and I often wonder why they keep coming back. He said that they keep coming back because they are learning something from me, so therefore I must have something of value to offer them. I never thought of it that way, but maybe I do.
Kim, I’m so glad you are feeling a little better – you are like me in the ability to “change the station” in your mind. Flexibility is such a great thing, isn’t it? If one thing doesn’t work, you can try something else.
For Petite, on the subject of what a man says……..I just wanted to share with you that I’ve heard it all. I’ve had men tell me they were in love with me, then turn around and cheat, then tell me they never really loved me. I have found it best not to pay too much attention to what they say, but to look at their BEHAVIORS. This will tell you if they care or not.
candy
Star – Wow! Sounds like you are doing ok. Good luck 🙂
mandorla
AUSSIEGIRL and SKYLAR… thanks for your comments…really appreciate it.. 😉
aussiegirl… I dont really know much about the bible (thank you though for lil mini briefing… very intersting) anyways..(my knowlege is more of spiritual concept potpourri.. than religious) but it’s makes me feel a little better that at least one person had had a similiar thought… 😉 …(so im not entirely wacked out..lol)
I mean i can totally picture communication between non-materialized angels and demons… but yes the telepathic …non-verbal communication between materialized demons…yup…a bit hard to get ones head around..
perhaps I’ll just put the intention of recieving more info/ insight on this particular question out to the universe… and it shall come…. there done..:)
another ??? though..
this fact that there is no solution… it does totally make sense about being fallen angels… and NOT wanting anyones help… b/c if they did… they would eventually be no longer.. or alot less… i just find the concept sooo disheartening… I guess in the end I just feel that light eventually trumps dark.. (one can only hope)…
I’m just still banking on the fact that with the information age and everyone being connected by it…that Sociopathy will become more and more exposed… I mean people now, just in the last 10 yrs, are starting to talk about bi-polar disorder in casual conversation.. I just feel like as time goes… and more and more people are affected… society will be forced to search harder for curing or rehabilitating their madness..?
Also…This is another idea which is faith based sensitive (sorry)… but… has anyone heard of Dr. Hew Len. He is a healer in hawaii that supposedly… using a healing technique called Ho’oponopono… cured a whole ward of mentally ill patients (including many S’s/P’s)…
The book is called ZERO LIMITS by JOE VITALE..
Just wondering if anybody had heard about it..?? and their thoughts…?
…peace
Stargazer
Thanks, Candy. I thought I’d dealt with my past abuse issues. I had no idea how huge and destructive an influence my stepfather has been in my life. It’s as though he interrupted and changed the course of my life. Compared to him, the spath was just a blip on my radar screen.