How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Archives for Lovefraud Reader

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Advice for relatives of elder abuse victims hooked by sociopaths

//  by //  3 Comments

Editor's note: The following letter was received from a Lovefraud reader. Many years ago my wealthy (and elderly) widower father entered into a relationship with a sociopathic woman. She is very charming and beautiful. This was marriage number four for her. Her last marriage had been completely predatory. My father's health is good, his mind is sharp but his memory is failing. The more his memory fails, the more his wife isolates him. She does this in brazen and cruel ways too numerous to write about here in this short note. She also encouraged him to drink alcohol and take potent sleeping pills. He was hospitalized several times for overdose. My father has a substantial estate and it …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Advice for relatives of elder abuse victims hooked by sociopathsRead More

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: An intense relationship, until he threw me back

//  by //  65 Comments

Editor's note: This letter was sent in by Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Renata." I know, as far as abuse stories go, this isn't a doozy. I'm sure other women and men have gone through far worse. And that is precisely why I want to share my story, because, even though this guy isn't a major abuser, he's a manipulative, conniving and voracious predator. He will believe he is using his charm and "kindness" to befriend women who are vulnerable and heartbroken, giving them something to feel good about, over and over. He will lead them down the rosy garden path, all the while knowing that he has NO intention of reciprocating a safe and loving relationship. He only uses his "victims" for …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: An intense relationship, until he threw me backRead More

Could oxytocin – the brain’s love chemical – be the real ‘love potion #9’?

//  by //  42 Comments

Editor's note: Joyce M. Short is the author of a just released book, “Carnal Abuse by Deceit.” The book chronicles her life with a predator, the subsequent aftermath and her road to recovery. It also provides advice for victims and their supporters, and discusses the issues surrounding criminalization of rape-by-fraud. Joyce lives in New York City, where she's a real estate broker, professional tennis instructor and a strong advocate for her community. By Joyce M. Short Does Love Potion #9 Really Exist? The hit record written by Leiber & Stoller back in 1959, Love Potion #9, was originally recorded by The Clovers and published by the Aberbach brothers who owned Hill & Range Songs Inc …

Could oxytocin – the brain’s love chemical – be the real ‘love potion #9’?Read More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The menacing spirit

//  by //  29 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was written by Lovefraud reader "Carmella" and refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery.  The subject that I've been deliberating very long and hard about posting is very sticky, very personal, and somewhat spiritually volatile, but as I reflect, I begin to see how this phenomenon has followed me throughout my life from its very beginnings. I realize that my exposure to this psychological/spiritual archetype had even caused me to "join the ranks" temporarily as I (and here is the irony) searched for an escape from it. The archetype of which I speak is that of the menacing spirit the spirit of the bored, …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The menacing spiritRead More

How Career Con Artists Take Risks With Your Career, Reputation, and Resources

//  by //  6 Comments

Editor's note: The following story was contributed by the Lovefraud reader "Abbie123." Names have been changed. A while ago, I was going through a difficult break up when an acquaintance friend of mine named "George" invited me to "get away from it all" at a conference held on an exclusive resort island, no strings attached. Although George and I had only known each other a few weeks, I was vulnerable and the rare opportunity to boost my own spirits and career by spending a weekend mingling with an elite group of international business leaders in my professional field in the lap of luxury so far from my painful reality seemed irresistible. But that was not what happened in reality. As i …

How Career Con Artists Take Risks With Your Career, Reputation, and ResourcesRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I loved my first wife; I was played by my second wife

//  by //  54 Comments

Editor's note: The following letter was sent by the Lovefraud reader “Philip.” Names have been changed. My very long story starts in December of 2004. My first wife, Lee, was terminally ill, and I was the only one that took care of her. I also had two teens, and they were not any help at all. My mother in-law had moved from out of state in order to give me some help. She was more trouble at the time than help. None of Lee's family other than her biological mother came to help. As a matter of fact, they all pretty much kept their distance since she got sick. So, I took care of Lee, by myself, for about five years or more. I ended up having a breakdown. I was told that this was "Care giver b …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I loved my first wife; I was played by my second wifeRead More

John R. Sperry threatened his wife, Joyce Jaccodie – and then made good on it

//  by //  8 Comments

By Stacey Jaccodie As a child, I didn't recognize the signs but they were all there. Sadly, we dubbed my mother's ex-husband's antics: Stupid Sperry tricks. My mother laughed off and even poked at the lion at times, never understanding the danger that lurked beneath the mask. My mother married a sociopath. She didn't know it. No one knew it. It took me years into my adulthood to finally unravel his background and investigate his psyche to learn it. I am not a doctor — I am the daughter of a victim of a sociopath who knows far more today than I'd ever wished for. In 1969, Joyce Jaccodie was a 33-year-old widow with three young daughters to raise. She later met and married a decorated w …

John R. Sperry threatened his wife, Joyce Jaccodie – and then made good on itRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I’m at a loss about what to do (Part 2)

//  by //  64 Comments

Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as "WalkingInLight." Read Part 1 here. Towards the end of our separation a man rang me from S's church to see if he could help S and I get back together. He told me he had spoken to S and was now speaking to me to see if he could help. I told him I still loved S but really believed he did not love me. This man said he would talk to S the next time he saw him. Now I have to say that I had not been going to this man's church for a couple of years because the teaching had taken a ”˜strange turn,' so I was at a different church to my husband. Even though my husband agreed about the teaching, he said he couldn't leave that church …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I’m at a loss about what to do (Part 2)Read More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I’m at a loss about what to do (Part 1)

//  by //  13 Comments

Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as "WalkingInLight." Part 2 will be posted tomorrow. I am sharing my story with you to clarify it all in my own head and to see if I should be moving out of this relationship. The trouble is, I have been in this marriage for 20 years (minus some years of separation) and though I know it's not normal, I have got used to it, and don't know if it is bad enough to leave, even though I have no love, trust or respect for this man left. I feel he has killed it all. I am confused because we are not living in a hostile way to each other, so I don't know if it would be more harmful to my children to leave. Here is my story. Sorry in …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I’m at a loss about what to do (Part 1)Read More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: After the sociopath, whole and human again

//  by //  3 Comments

Editor's note: The following was written by the Lovefraud reader "Winifred." She previously wrote "The Other Prey loving someone previously married to a sociopath." I have just read the story from "Edward" entitled, My involvement with a female sociopath. My heart goes out to the people who are collateral damage from the wrath of a sociopath...male or female. I would like to get the message out there that there is actually a way to recover from this hell, and after picking up the pieces and getting to know ourselves again, to find someone who has no evil agenda, someone who wants what we want! I have been with my husband for 10 years now, and we have been through it all! I believe that …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: After the sociopath, whole and human againRead More