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Lovefraud Reader

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: My journal entry about susceptibility to the sociopath

April 30, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  30 Comments

UPDATED FOR 2023. Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader sent the following entry from her journal. "About 2 1/2 months since the sociopath revealed himself for what he was, I'm now assessing how I made myself so vulnerable in the first place," she wrote. "Shockingly I realize I likely still am... still am as vulnerable... until I do my next needed self-work: truly healing my relationship with myself. Deeply." The following piece represents a step in her healing. I was thinking about whether I'd ever be able to reclaim my memories, once sweet, once preciously loving, of the past two years — ever since the sociopath revealed himself for the liar and deceiver that he is via his cruel d …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: My journal entry about susceptibility to the sociopathRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath, Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Seduced by a sociopath

Spath Tales

Smear campaign set me up as the abusive parent

April 24, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader who describes how her husband's smear campaign set her up at the abusive parent. He accused me of cheating on him which he kept these accusations going for the last two years of our marriage never believing me. He went to my family and friends crying and carrying on that I was cheating also that I was taking household money to buy drugs off the streets (didn’t happen I didn’t do this). He stalked me at my work — used a GPS tracking device and recording device on my van. He had altercations with management and the members of the country club I worked at. He never let me sleep, always creating a fight at night so I was sleep …

Smear campaign set me up as the abusive parentRead More

Category: Sociopaths and family

Spath Tales

A classic Lovefraud story: I married a sociopath

April 16, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  1 Comment

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call, “Charlotte23.” She was married to a man for 19 years. She was devastated to learn that she married a sociopath. Of course, I had no idea at the time. I married Tom in 2003. I had been married previously, for 15 years, and got divorced after finding out that my then-husband was cheating on me with someone he met at work. Where did he work? The World Trade Center. He was killed on 9/11/2001. Tom came along right about that same time. I had just bought a lovely home in a beautiful neighborhood for myself and my two children. We dated for a year before getting engaged; it was another year after that before we g …

A classic Lovefraud story: I married a sociopathRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Spath Tales

A doctor twice ends up in the psych ward because of her sociopathic ex

April 2, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call Allison23. She reveals how her ex-husband got her thrown into the psych ward — twice. The sociopath in my life “saved” me from my abusive mother and got me out of the trailer park. I eventually earned 4 degrees, one of which was an MD. Looking back, the relationship was always controlling, but he made me believe that he was doing what he did because he needed to “mold” me into the perfect woman because my parents “didn’t do a good job”. As soon as I started making more money than him, his violence escalated and I finally got the courage to leave him in the middle of the night. Little did I know this would be …

A doctor twice ends up in the psych ward because of her sociopathic exRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Sociopaths and family

Spath Tales

The cheating golf pro

March 11, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Editor’s note: A Lovefraud reader relates her devastating experience with a cheating golf pro. I was unhappily married. Took golf lessons from a golf instructor, was completely enamored by him. He was married, his wife lived in another state and he only went to see her for 3-4 days once a month otherwise was with me. He was an alcoholic, 58, I’m 47, spent from June 2020 when I met him to Oct 2020 here with me and then he left for the winter to live in Fla with her. We talked almost every day. He completely changes Then a month before he came back started acting weird, super mean, things didn’t add up, mind games… When he gets back here April 2021 played mind games all summer, started go …

The cheating golf proRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Spath Tales

I am a parent of two sociopathic children

February 26, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  1 Comment

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Theresa23, who relates her experience as the parent of two sociopathic children. My experience is probably a bit different than most, but then again maybe not, maybe it's just not talked about. I am a parent of two sociopathic children. One is a boy age 21, and the other is a girl age 28. The girl is more of a histrionic antisocial personality disordered person where my son is more of a narcissistic sociopathic or possibly even psychopathic person. “Blame the mama” This is important to me because so often in the media, and in therapeutic journals and everywhere else- people want to "blame the mama"! I a …

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Category: For parents of sociopaths

Spath Tales

My pet sitter pleaded for help then stole from me

February 17, 2023 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call, “Laura23.” She hired a pet sitter, who turned into a parasite and then a thief. My mother was dying, I had to rush to be by her side. I have two dogs and I never travel because of them. I took a friend's referral to hire a pet sitter. This pet sitter ended up asking to sleep on my couch after my initial evening interview with her, claiming her landlord was creepy when she comes home after dark. With all of the "me too" movement, my initial gut reaction was, "hell no" he isn't going to harass you for coming home after dark. My mother was dying and I had to go out of town again, and used this dog sitter again …

My pet sitter pleaded for help then stole from meRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Spath Tales

I married a psychopath while he was in jail

December 10, 2022 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Marianne22. She married a psychopath while he was in jail. Met my psychopath (clinically diagnosed) while working at a correctional institution (shame & stupidity felt even now after 28 years). At this time I didn't know about his diagnosis. His indulgent family After his release it became apparently clear that he came from a family (10) that was privileged and personal needs & wants were met at any expense. Slowly at first I started recognizing behaviors that I began to question but always found excuses to downplay his disappearing games, flirtatious contacts and his never ending personal n …

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Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Spath Tales

My ex may be a confidential informant

September 17, 2022 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  Leave a Comment

Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who describes her involvement with a man who may have been a confidential informant. We dated for two years although unequally yoked. The very first thing that occurred was when he initially asked me to date him and after agreeing; although I distinctly told him no Friday date this very first Friday due to me being at the library studying; as I was a studious college student maintaining a 3.5 GPA and above. However, despite both of our parents being professional college graduates, he was a high school dropout. Despite my telling him no Friday date, he approached me at the library. So, with hindsight being 20/20, I now know that was the …

My ex may be a confidential informantRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Spath Tales

The sociopath smeared and sabotaged me

September 10, 2022 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  2 Comments

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Christine22 about her involvement with a sociopath who smeared and sabotaged her. There’s so much, too much. He got me fired, so he could move on to the new girl, he’s stolen my identity. He hijacked all my accounts, registered my tablet, phone, and google account as his own. I was catching him using his. So he used my computer to register my tablet, he created I don’t know how many different accounts, and 3rd party apps. He’s had me stalked at home several times when I turn my location sharing off. So he couldn’t make sure I was at home and not finding him at the locations he was at and not at work like he …

The sociopath smeared and sabotaged meRead More

Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

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Lovefraud Blog Recent Comments

  • recovery46 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: He assured me he would never, could never hurt me like that again: “Bernice—it’s 2025 and my experience with the spath was EXACTLY the same! I kept rereading bc all the details were…”
  • sept4 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Letting go of monetary justice is releasing the ties that bind: “This is what I actually struggle with most now that I am a decade out of divorce. I did not…”
  • Donna Andersen on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “Good point! Thank you”
  • sept4 on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “All very true and very good advice. I would like to add that too can always call police if you…”
  • eleanoreliza1234 on When bad behavior shows symptoms, not flaws  : “What a beautifully composed response by Emilie 18! Reassuring to know that others have experienced the same. Thank you, Emilie.”

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