In my book, Red Flags of Love Fraud — 10 signs you’re dating a sociopath, Red Flag #10 is a “Jekyll and Hyde personality.” The term “Jekyll and Hyde” originated in a Gothic horror novella published in 1886 by Robert Louis Stevenson. Today, the phrase means a person with a two-sided personality — one side good and the other evil. In the original story, Dr. Henry Jekyll was an upstanding gentleman and Mr. Edward Hyde was prone to violence. The story reveals that Dr. Jekyll was drinking an elixir that turned him into Mr. Hyde, who committed multiple murders. Eventually, however, Jekyll spontaneously turned into Hyde, without the elixir. Then, he became Hyde permanently. Romantic …
Advice for Protecting Elderly Relatives from Sociopaths and Gold Diggers
UPDATED FOR 2025: Lovefraud posted a story from a reader whom we called "Maura." She described how a female sociopath latched on to her recently widowed father, took over his life, and tried to hasten his demise. Read the story. Maura also shared tips that she and her family learned the hard way for protecting elderly relatives from sociopaths and gold diggers. I included the tips in my book, "Senior Sociopaths — How to recognize and escape lifelong abusers." Here's what you need to know about sociopaths after the age of 50: My research show that they will not get better, and they will likely get worse. Be warned. Our Advice On How Protecting An Elderly Relative from …
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3 reasons for stupid sociopath behavior
Here on Lovefraud, we often talk about how evil, callous and deceitful sociopaths are. If you’ve been involved with a sociopath for any length of time, you certainly have your own horror stories. But today, I’m going to focus on something that doesn’t get a lot of attention: Stupid sociopath behavior. Sociopaths can engage in actions, both small and large, that make absolutely no sense. I’ll give you some examples from my own history. But first, let me clarify the terminology. The word “sociopath” is no longer a clinical diagnosis. I use it as an umbrella term to describe people who prey on or damage almost everyone that they spend time with. Officially, these people could be diagnosed …
When you’re judged for believing the sociopath
When you finally realize that everything the sociopath told you was a lie, and your whole involvement was nothing but exploitation, you’re crushed. The last thing you need is people criticizing you for believing the lies —but they do. Today I’ll offer five realities to help you when you’re judged for believing the sociopath. I know what it’s like to be judged. It just happened to me. I’ve been talking about my marriage to a sociopathic con man for years. Three times, I’ve told my story a reality TV show. The latest series was called Love, Honor, Betray, and it recently became available on HBO Max and Hulu. My story is Episode 6 and is called, Too Good to …
Codependence and the consequences of forgiveness
Editor’s note: The Lovefraud author Eleanor Cowan wants to educate survivors of narcissistic abuse into recognizing how their own actions may contribute to their misery. She is writing a collection of true stories called, “Impactful Stories for Stubborn Codependents.” Eleanor’s biographical book is called, “A History of a Pedophile’s Wife.” Who’s Responsible for This? By Eleanor Cowan “You’ve never snapped at me before, Mia,” said her post-surgery patient, a long-distance trucker anxious to be back on the road. “My team’s heading to my dreamed-of Alaska next week. I so want to be with them,” he pleaded, frustrated that Nurse Mia declined to sign his discharge papers. “Let’s not …
Why psychopaths can’t love
The fundamental problem with psychopaths is that they do not have the ability to authentically love. I say this all the time in my articles and videos. A reasonable question to ask is why? Why can’t psychopaths love? For the answer, we need to look deep into human biology, psychology and even evolution. Luckily, the Lovefraud author Dr. Liane Leedom has done this. She is a psychiatrist and professor of psychology and counseling at the University of Bridgeport. I am interviewing her on Lovefraud Live on Jan. 7, 2026, at 8 pm ET, when she will explain in detail why psychopaths can’t love. Here are the basics, based on one of Dr. Leedom’s published works called, Psychopathy: A Behavioral …
8 attempts to control a sociopath: They all fail
You’ve probably been shocked, even blindsided, by the behavior of the sociopath. Why? Because his or her behavior violates your longstanding, lifelong models of what it means to be human and how people should act. Following are eight ways people often attempt to control a sociopath. They all fail. Remember, a sociopath, according to the Lovefraud author Dr. Liane Leedom, is someone who preys on and/or damages nearly everyone they spend time with. Clinically, they could be diagnosed with antisocial, narcissistic, borderline, histrionic or psychopathic personality disorder. You may look up the definitions of these disorders and decide that they seem to fit the person who is …
Why everything falls apart after the sociopath
I’ve noticed a pattern among people who have left, or are leaving, sociopaths. Here it is: As they are escaping, multiple aspects of their lives become a mess. Today I’ll explain why everything falls apart after the sociopath. This happened to me. I left my sociopathic husband when I discovered that not only was he spending all my money, but he was also cheating on me and had a child with another woman during our marriage. We had moved to Florida for one of his business schemes. Because we were married, I felt obligated to support my husband’s goals — until I was broke. That obligation ended when I discovered his infidelity. I abandoned him and drove back to New …
Sociopaths’ predatory behavior is intentional
If you have a sociopath in your life for any significant period of time, whether as a romantic partner, family member, friend or business associate, here’s what you need to understand: You will be damaged. These people are manipulators and exploiters, and their predatory behavior is intentional. Oh, they may say it’s not their fault. They may try to make you feel sorry for all the bad things that have happened to them in the past (which may or may not be true). Or they’ll blame others for anything that goes wrong. But make no mistake — these are simply tactics to achieve their objective, which is to use anyone and everyone who can provide something that they want. “A sociopath is …
Breaking the compulsion to “fix” and “help”
UPDATED FOR 2025. Lovefraud once received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Edna": I won't go into the long, boring details of my 7+ year relationship with the sociopath that invaded my life. It's the same basic story as always and plus, I think there's some kind of email size limit. :) Ever since I ended the engagement over 3 years ago, and finally terminated the relationship itself another year after, I've made comments (in a lighthearted, self deprecating fashion) that, "If you're going to treat me like crap, then I'm the girl for you!" Yes, it gets chuckles from the people I'm around, but sadly it's true. I was watching a movie and was judging the characters on their …