Editor's note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, offers suggestions on how to handle toxic family and friends. Read more about Liberty. By Liberty Forrest If you've landed here at LoveFraud, chances are that you're reeling from the pain and disruption of a toxic relationship or upbringing. Or both. Sociopaths and the fallout of abusive relationships can cause a ripple effect that's more like a tidal wave that trashes your life in too many ways to count. And it can go on for many years. Once your self-esteem and self-worth have taken a beating, your choices are adversely affected, as are your connections with people in …
Why psychopaths talk so much
UPDATED FOR 2021. Psychopaths tend to dominate conversation. Many of us know this first hand, but the reasons why psychopaths talk so much have been documented in a scientific paper published by the Public Library of Science, PLOS.org. Researchers brought together same-sex college students in groups of three people. None of them knew each other. The students were asked to engage in small talk. The conversations were videotaped, and researchers later analyzed who did all the talking. It turned out that study participants with higher scores in primary psychopathy, as measured by the Levenson Self-Report Psychopathy Scale (LSRP), spoke more words and controlled the conversation more than …
The six-month relationship: He lied, I paid
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Sharon21. she met a guy online. While he lied, I paid, she said. Names are changed. Whew! This is hard to revisit! I’m still very much in the healing process. I have listened to so many books, I have read so much on Narcissism, it has consumed my life. Until I experienced what I did, Narcissist was just a word to me. I truly believe the Narc I was involved with could lead the pack! It was that bad. I’m an empath. Hands down. I’m educated. I’m professional. I hold a Management position with a large corporation. I spend my days, caring for and helping the elderly. I’m a single mom of 3 kids. I was with …
The Serenity Prayer: Letting Go of What No Longer Works for You
Editor's note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, reminds us of the beauty and power of the Serenity Prayer, and how it can help us let go of what no longer supports us. Read more about Liberty. By Liberty Forrest As you've landed on this site, I'm guessing you've been slammed with a lot of lessons on "letting go." Perhaps you've had to let go of dreams, your home, family members, a relationship, your lifestyle, the past, or a long list of other aspects of your life. It can feel completely devastating. You might even feel like it's more than you can bear. I can relate to that; I've been there myself, many times, so I do …
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I think my son is a sociopath
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call, Marsha21. She believes her son is a sociopath, and describes his behavior from childhood to the present. Donna Andersen responds to her questions after her letter. I think my son is a sociopath. I say this with heaviness in my heart. Saying it out loud makes me sound like a terrible mother. I often chastise myself as to where I went wrong, how I could have done better, I take the blame. I’m still not entirely convinced that he is, but I do know there is something definitely wrong with him (his whole life). Even as a young child, I think he was manipulating me. Besides the “normal” things kids …
When there seems to be no escape from the sociopath …
UPDATED FOR 2021. Lovefraud once posted the story of "Billyjean" in an article called Alone. Exhausted. Lonely. Stressed. Stuck. She described how she felt like there was no escape from the sociopath. The headline pretty much sums up Billyjean's position. This single mom had thought she found a man who loved her. She married him, became pregnant and discovered he was cheating on her. Now Billyjean has a baby, no family support, and can't afford to leave. Plus, although her ex doesn't want to be with her, he also doesn't want to divorce her. He provides some financial support, and therefore feels entitled to show up at Billyjean's apartment whenever he wants, supposedly to see the child …
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How Feeling Unlovable Leads to a Need for Perfection
Editor's note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, explains how she developed a need for perfection based in fear, and how she let it go. Read more about Liberty. By Liberty Forrest I've been a perfectionist about many things in my life and thankfully, have let go of most of that tendency. The need for perfection came from a massive fear of failure. And the massive fear of failure came from a deeply rooted belief that I was not lovable. If I could just be good enough, I would be worthy of love. Of course, that wasn't in my conscious mind but that's what was going on. Being taken from my birth mother after bonding with her, …
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Bullying and harassment in an Episcopal Church
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story of sociopathic harassment in an Episcopal Church, endured, amazingly, by one of the church’s leaders. Names are changed. My name’s Benjamin, and my same-sex spouse and I are the victims of a sociopath. Even worse, the sociopath is the priest who married us. My story begins with a well-known Episcopal church. When I arrived there in 2011, it was love at first sight. People were friendly and welcoming, and the church beautiful. Even better the rector, whom we’ll call Dave (not his real name), was personable and gave a great sermon. It wasn’t long before I was asked to run for the vestry, which is the board of directors in an …
Turn the Other Cheek? Not on Your Life.
Editor's note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, explains why is is a bad idea to turn the other cheek, and a better idea to stand up for yourself. Read more about Liberty. By Liberty Forrest I'll tell you, straight up, I do not believe in turning the other cheek. I'm not so sure they mean it in the Bible, either, because somewhere in there it says, "an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth." Although to be honest, that isn't the only contradiction in the Bible. Anyway, I'm not here to talk about the Bible, as I'm not a Christian—although that's not why I don't believe in turning the other cheek. The thing is, I …
Sociopaths say they want love, but what they really want is supply
UPDATED FOR 2021. Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Suzette." She can't understand why sociopaths say they want love, when their behavior is not at all loving. It's strange, my brother (who I have no doubt in my mind is a sociopath), craves being loved. He bounces from relationship to relationship, using his girlfriends. Yet when he screws up, and has his girlfriend threaten to leave him, he acts so desperate! Desperate for human connection. He tells me that he can't live without love in his life, and that he NEEDS a girlfriend by his side. I don't understand this. He's a drug addict, and he uses his girlfriends for support - and before he had any …
Sociopaths say they want love, but what they really want is supplyRead More