Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Caroltta." I am 72 ”¦ was married 12/60 ”¦ found out in 1/14 my husband, a pastor for 45 yrs., committed adultery @ every pastorate. In fact, he says he has no idea how many x's & does not remember all the women. There was incest involved in his promiscuous life. He considered divorce for many of his women, but knew he could not preach after that, so his last girlfriend convinced him to murder me & they had a plan which did not work out because I told him I was retiring & he could come with me or not. He has been afraid to do anything, because it would mean no further contact with his child …
Recording artist loses his exciting career over sociopathic woman
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Cory." It started in 2013. I was a semi-successful, growing recording artist and singer. I just got full custody of my first daughter I was touring. Doing radio interviews. Life was exciting and full of enchantment. I became involved with a young woman I had been talking to since high school on and off. She had always seemed sweet. And a great mother as she had 2 boys of her own. We finally got to meet face to face and had sex. I'm not going to lie. It was amazing. She had it all in my eyes looks, charm, amazing in bed. Willing to do things in bed that most women wouldn't dream of. The third time …
Recording artist loses his exciting career over sociopathic womanRead More
Con artist Bobbi Ann Finley now on her 15th husband
She's baaaack!!! Lovefraud first wrote about Bobbi Ann Finley almost five years ago, in September 2010. Finley had a habit of hanging around military bases, meeting servicemen, marrying them, and wiping out their bank accounts. When we first wrote about Finley, she'd married 14 men and had at least nine children with almost as many fathers. She was so infamous that she was profiled on ABC's 20/20. In 2011 Finely was convicted of fraud. She was sentenced to three years in an Alabama prison. Well, she's out, and up to her old tricks. She's married again, although Husband #15 is not military. But they're wanted for passing bad checks all over Oregon, unauthorized use of a motor vehicle …
Con artist Bobbi Ann Finley now on her 15th husbandRead More
Know the truth: You are worthy
I recently received a very short email that asked a very important question. Here it is: Can you give me some advice on how to deal with people who proclaim that I'm worth nothing? By way of background, the email came from a young woman whom we'll call "Alma." Alma is a college student who first wrote to me back in January. A man who supervised her during her summer internship showed interest in her. Although the young woman initially did not respond, he pursued and pursued, until, thinking that he really loved her, Alma finally accepted him. Then, when she left the internship, the man dumped her. Alma was traumatized and could not concentrate on her studies. But people around her …
‘Justified’ highlights the differences between killers and psychopaths
One of my favorite television shows ever, Justified, just came to an end. After six seasons, the series finale of this smart, sophisticated crime drama, set in redneck Kentucky, aired on Tuesday, April 14, 2015. That morning, the Philadelphia Inquirer ran an article by Tirdad Derakhshani previewing the grand finale. Derakhshani wrote that the main character, U.S. Marshall Raylan Givens (played by Timothy Olyphant), had "the best lawman swagger since John Wayne." I agree. Here's how Derakhshani described the marshall: "A latter-day cowboy who inhabits a strange, surreal version of Harlan County, Ky., Raylan is a gunslinger for the ages. One who kills. Again. And again. He's more of a …
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He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 3 of 3.
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." Read Part 1 and Part 2 When my ex returned to my hometown, his behavior was the worst ever, as I discussed previously. And while I lived around my family, he had distanced us from them. It was only after my oldest son had a nightmare that I was shot (he was 12 yrs old) and my daughter (just 3 yrs old) was afraid from nightmares and wanted to stay with me to sleep, (both episodes occurring within 24 hours) I sought an ex parte against him. I remember telling my children that they'd come to realize it was for the best. Again, it was my 8 yr old son who emphatically stated, "we already know it's …
He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 3 of 3.Read More
He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 2 of 3.
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." Read Part 1. We were working together, but would come home to an environment that continued to whittle away at me. He would leave on the weekends or whenever something happened to a community member. He ignored me physically and emotionally, even if he brought me with him on weekends away. We would stay in his parents' home. He would go out and leave me there, alone. (His parents would take my son into their bedroom and close the door during this time.) I wasted away spiritually and physically. Eventually, my father came over to ask what was happening. He (anyone really) could easily see me …
He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 2 of 3.Read More
He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 1 of 3
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." I'd like to preface my story by describing my childhood. I led a charmed existence. I was smart and idealistic. I chose the field of medicine, despite my passion for writing, because I wanted to see humanity on its most fundamental level. My parents are hard working, and have built an empire from the ground up. As a young woman, I never would have imagined I'd become a victim to domestic violence. Nor did I dream I'd ever divorce. And it didn't happen overnight. There were layers upon layers of abuse that came in many forms, starting as attacks to my self-esteem. When I finally looked up …
He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 1 of 3Read More
Research links stress and a bad relationship to high blood pressure
Research conducted by the University of Michigan links stress, negative relationship quality and high blood pressure in older married couples. Findings: Husbands had higher blood pressure when their wives reported greater stress. Husbands who reported greater stress had lower blood pressure when their wives reported lower stress. Wives who reported greater stress had lower blood pressure when their husbands reported greater stress. The researchers speculated that these findings were due to the fact that husbands relied on their wives for support, whereas wives had a broader support network. According to the paper, "When both partners reported higher levels of negative relationship qu …
Research links stress and a bad relationship to high blood pressureRead More
How long does it take to recover from a sociopath?
Most of you who come to Lovefraud are here because you suspect, or have concluded, that your partner is a sociopath. You are shocked, traumatized, betrayed, disappointed, angry. You may know, on an intellectual level, that you need to end the relationship, but you may find it hard to take the steps to do it. Or, you have already ended the relationship and are working to maintain No Contact with the individual, even as he or she pleads, cries or threatens, trying to draw you back into the web. Whatever your circumstances, you feel terrible. Your emotions range from grief to sadness to disappointment to fear to anger to hatred. Internally, you're a churning hot mess, and you want an answer …