How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Stalking, burglary, identity theft — all by one criminal

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Most criminals specialize. They're drug runners, or they're car thieves, or they're credit card fraudsters, etc. One of the indicators of a psychopath, however, is "criminal versatility." That means psychopaths engage in all kinds of crime. A Lovefraud reader sent me a story, and "criminal versatility" seems to apply. Christopher Endicott, of Dakota County,  Minnesota, was sentenced last week for stalking, burglary and identity theft. According to KARE11 in Minnesota, Endicott said in court, "I don't pretend that what I did makes sense, even to me. There is no excuse for my actions." Here's what Endicott, a former principal, did, according to KARE11: Broke into his neighbors' …

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Adopted by a sociopath, leading to a lifetime of sociopaths

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Evelyn19." Names have been changed. There is so much. There have been 5 sociopaths of extreme significance in my life: My adopted father 2. Two husbands 3. One "boyfriend" 4. My son. These relationships span the entire course of my life. I never told anyone my story until now. I was afraid. Now I am alone, fighting to survive, and still afraid. But I thought maybe my story might open another's person awareness to the dangers, horror and complete destruction they can cause. I was born an "illegitimate" child of a 16-year old girl in a Catholic hospital in Texas. My biological grandmother and …

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Sociopath Survivor Journal Part 2: The failures of family court

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Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call Olivia19, shared her personal reflections, in a stream-of-consciousness style, on her experience with a disordered husband. We’ll publish sections of her journaling over several installments. Read Part 1: When Evil says 'I do.' Lies accepted in family court Left alone by all to prove what rightfully is yours, to pick up the broken pieces and make your life. He continues to make all our children's and my financial choices and lives in deceit and lies. He is innocent unless you prove his guilt; he need not prove truth and his lies are accepted or justified by misinformation and complication he creates. Chaos works, along with a lack of a …

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Daniel Spence, gay fake millionaire, scams friends, family, lovers and strangers

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The Observer recently ran a story about Daniel Spence, a sociopathic con artist (although the article didn't identify him as a sociopath). Read it here: The Grindr Grifter, on Observer.com. It's a good and well-written description of how a sociopathic con artist works: Spence, originally from Texas but most recently operating in hipster Brooklyn, made outrageous claims of wealth and power, flaunting the money he acquired by defrauding friends and lovers. Here are some instructive highlights: 1 . Yes, sociopaths operate in the gay community. Spence appeared to be gay, and targeted gay men. However, he may or may not have been authentically gay, because the sexual orientation of …

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Sociopath Survivor Journal, Part 1: When Evil says ‘I do’

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Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call Olivia19, shared her personal reflections, in a stream-of-consciousness style, on her experience with a disordered husband. We’ll publish sections of her journaling over several installments. When Evil says “I do” Whether it be Sean, John, Gord, Thomas, Linda or Sue, evil takes on many names. Many faces. They live their lives with lies, half truths, twisting of words and circumstances, manipulation, financial chaos, deceit or out and out lack of kindness and respect. They abuse. They often have lived a second life for years. Suddenly you find yourself living the "common" story. Your marriage is plagued with those hurdles and roadblocks t …

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Meditation on a devastating experience with a sociopath

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call Barbara19. Are you ready for the rain? I recently went through a gut wrenching experience. I have not moved completely through the storm, however I am learning to dance in the rain. Before, I would hide in a cave to escape the feeling of wet clothes and dripping hair on my skin. If I couldn’t find a cave, I would pull out my umbrella, which was as large as a carnival top – yes, the red and white stripped one with the red center flag – I was so used to my umbrella I forgot it was there, just like the white elephant who sat in my living room for 14 years. Who wouldn’t want a cute elephant as a conti …

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Children with a sociopath — do you stay or do you go?

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Finally figuring out, after years of marriage and a couple of kids, that your partner is a sociopath, is a good news/bad news situation. The good news: You are not crazy. You were not imagining things and you were not overreacting. There is a bona fide, medical reason for the insanity you have been enduring — your spouse has a serious personality disorder. The bad news: Now that you know what the problem is, you need to figure out what to do about it — and all of the options are difficult. I'm writing this blog in response to the post in the Lovefraud Forum submitted by "Gccc," called 16 years, 2 children later, my life imploded. A death of sorts. Following is what she wrote. The Vo …

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John Martin Hill scams woman for $80,000 – just his latest love fraud victim

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Here we go again — another online love fraud case. John Martin Hill was arrested in Tennessee last week, accused of taking $80,000 from a Georgia woman he met on Match.com. But apparently, she was just the most recent victim. Police in Gwinnett County, Georgia, are talking to detectives in four other states — Virginia, Delaware, Maryland and New Jersey — about dating scams he allegedly pulled there as well. Hill had convinced the Georgia woman that he was a millionaire and in love with her. On the day they met in person, they agreed to get married within the week. The woman gave him $80,000, and Hill disappeared. Man accused in online love scam connected to crimes in multiple states, on …

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Married to a sociopath at 16 and living a lie for 29 years

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Editor's Note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Ellen19." I got married at 16 to a guy who was supposed to be a football star. He acted like he was very moral — never lying, never carousing. He was supposed to have had a 3.89 grade average. So popular, smart and moral — his family kept backing him up, and the occasional neighbor would come by to tell me how lucky I was. Fast forward 29 years. I finally divorce him because for the 15 years he was living off me, he had money but he refused to pay bills or provide food. I weighed 83 pounds and he weighed 220. Once I got away from him I found out he casually had sex almost daily and he was giving me H …

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Gender identity: fun and games for psychopaths

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One of the issues raging through the political landscape these days, stirring up passions on the left and the right, is the Equality Act, passed by the United States House of Representatives on May 17, 2019. Proponents of the law generally say that everyone should be treated the same, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Objections to provisions of the law are often based on opponents' views on biology or religious convictions. But this law should also be evaluated in the context of the millions of psychopaths living among us, who I believe will have a great time exploiting it. And that's what Lovefraud's research — highlighted below — indicates. What the Equality Act s …

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