A Lovefraud reader asked the following question: If the sociopath is not in it for money (he pays for everything with no access to my accounts) then what are other reasons to stay in a relationship if he doesn't live with me nor do we share anything financially? Many of the posts I have read involve financial fraud. If a sociopath has targeted you, it's because you have something that he or she wants. Often it's money, but not always. Here are 10 more things that the sociopath may want: 1. Sex Sociopaths crave stimulation, and sex is highly stimulating, so they pursue it. However, sociopaths are not slaves to their physical urges. They often use sex primarily as a tool of …
To a sociopath, children are simply bait and leverage
Every week, a chapter of my book,"Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, use the links at the bottom of the post. I’ve also just released a new ebook titled Narcissists, SOCIOPATHS & Wolves: Lessons From Little Red Riding Hood. (Just click here to find it on Amazon.com Narcissists SOCIOPATHS & Wolves.) Chapter 56A: It's Not Over Until Paul Says It's Over Three months after the divorce became official, Daniel was at one of his hated, required weekend visits with his father when he walked by Paul’s …
To a sociopath, children are simply bait and leverageRead More
Psychologist kills his ex-wife in murder-suicide during custody battle
Alabama police believe that Greg Scott, 63, a psychologist from Selma, killed his ex-wife, Mary Timmons Scott, 38, and then committed suicide. The couple were engaged in a custody dispute over their two young daughters. Greg Scott was found dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound in front of a funeral home. The body of his wife was found locked in the trunk of a car. 'Daddy shot mommy': Father-of-two psychologist, 63, 'killed his ex-wife, 35, and locked her body in trunk of a car before committing suicide' amid a custody battle, on DailyMail.Co.uk. …
Psychologist kills his ex-wife in murder-suicide during custody battleRead More
Marriage fraud: Immigrants profess love for U.S. citizens to get green cards
Elena Maria Lopez was a victim of marriage fraud — but she's trying to do something about it. Elena met a man from the Netherlands who was "romantic and charming." (Sound familiar?) When they married, Elena was looking for a life partner. Her husband was looking for a green card. My ex-husband was Australian, but had four American wives. And I've heard from many Lovefraud readers who eventually found out their foreign spouses only married them to get citizenship. Elena sent me a link to a recent investigative report by KPRC Channel 2 in Houston, in which she told her story. Elena has also testified in Congress — trying to get lawmakers to understand that marriage fraud is a serious p …
Marriage fraud: Immigrants profess love for U.S. citizens to get green cardsRead More
How long does it take to recover from a sociopath?
When I talk to people who have had their hearts broken into a million pieces by a sociopath, a question that I'm frequently asked is, "How long does it take to recover?" I wish there were an easy answer to the question, but there isn't. Involvements with sociopaths cause serious damage to our emotions, psychology, health, finances, social connections — to our very lives. What I can say is that recovery is certainly possible, but it will probably take longer than a typical breakup. Not breakup — betrayal Why is recovery from a sociopath so difficult? Because this is NOT a typical breakup — it is a profound betrayal. When normal people enter into a romantic relationship, it's becau …
Grateful for the truth on Thanksgiving
I remember the last Thanksgiving holiday with my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery. We were fighting. He kept telling me money would come in from his business venture, and it wasn't happening. As we drove to my family's house for Thanksgiving dinner, I was still steaming. The thought popped into my head, "All I want is my money back, and then I'll get a divorce." I surprised myself. It was the first time I thought about divorce. I never did get my money back. In fact, with all that was taken from me, I had to declare bankruptcy. Still, on this Thanksgiving Day 19 years later, I have much to be grateful for. I am grateful to know the truth. My ex-husband is a sociopath, …
Overcoming the residual fear from sociopathic abuse — two steps forward, one step back
By Eleanor Cowan One bitterly cold winter’s morning at the Vendome metro in Montreal, I hopped a bus that would take me to a lecture on "Attentiveness and Developing Awareness" — and got a complete lesson well before I arrived at the class. The driver of the vehicle, an unsmiling muscled-bound individual, closely examined my transfer for the minute expiry hour stamped upon it. With a curt nod, I was permitted to take my seat. About two minutes later, the driver revved up the ignition for departure, but not before an elderly lady rapped on the glass door, asking for entry. The driver looked down at her, examined his watch for the ten seconds it would have taken to open the door and adm …
Overcoming the residual fear from sociopathic abuse — two steps forward, one step backRead More
5 stages of endurance to help you recover from the sociopath
Sociopaths do terrible things to us. I hear so many painful stories from Lovefraud readers — perhaps you have a similar experience: You may have had your heart shattered into a million pieces You may have lost your home, your job and all your money You may have suffered physical assault, illness, and emotional or psychological breakdown You who have lost your children, because the sociopaths got custody, poisoned the kids' minds, or both You may who have lost years of your life, time that can never be replaced Sometimes when I hear these stories, my heart just breaks. Because sometimes, as much as I would like to offer solutions, the sociopaths have enacted such total d …
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Lovefraud webinar preview – The Five Step Exit: Tools you need to leave a psychopath, narcissist or other toxic partner
Are you starting to think that you should get out of your relationship — but you have no idea how to begin extricating yourself? If so, this course, presented by Dr. Amber Ault, takes you, step-by-step, through the process of gathering support for your escape to making your move — and dealing with the chaos that may follow. About this course You're not happy with your intimate relationship — you're feeling misunderstood, exploited, manipulated and devalued. But it's complicated — finances, kids, social pressures, not to mention your own confusion. How do you sort out what to do? The Five Step Exit course offers you a structured model to help you decide whether to hang in or get out. …
After getting rid of one sociopath, another sociopath shows up
I've heard from multiple Lovefraud readers over the years who were annoyed, angry, horrified. These readers had finally realized what they were dealing with—a sociopath. They extricated themselves from the relationships and had no further contact with the disordered individuals. And what happened? Another sociopath came into their lives. The readers asked: What is going on? Why can't they leave me alone? Am I a sociopath magnet? The answer is, not necessarily. Following are some observations to add perspective to the situation. Millions of sociopaths These disordered individuals are everywhere. As long as we're living on this planet, we face the possibility of running into t …
After getting rid of one sociopath, another sociopath shows upRead More