How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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After 30 years with a sociopath, she’s now having the time of her life

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a 67-year-old woman whom we'll call "Maura." Lied, cheated, used me and others. Serial adultery, pornography, probable bisexual behaviors, never used condoms. I didn't know about the adultery until much later. He suffered a head injury, and I mistakenly attributed his bad behaviors to that. Violent and aggressive. Marital fraud; some possessions, like a boat and trailer, "disappeared." Claimed money and objects were stolen, but never reported thefts to the police. Nagged and pestered me constantly to buy large items, mostly vehicles, that we couldn't afford. Developed "hobbies" that kept him away from home on a regular …

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Married to a sociopathic pastor for 55 years

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Caroltta." I am 72 ”¦ was married 12/60 ”¦ found out in 1/14 my husband, a pastor for 45 yrs., committed adultery @ every pastorate. In fact, he says he has no idea how many x's & does not remember all the women. There was incest involved in his promiscuous life. He considered divorce for many of his women, but knew he could not preach after that, so his last girlfriend convinced him to murder me & they had a plan which did not work out because I told him I was retiring & he could come with me or not. He has been afraid to do anything, because it would mean no further contact with his child …

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Recording artist loses his exciting career over sociopathic woman

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Cory." It started in 2013. I was a semi-successful, growing recording artist and singer. I just got full custody of my first daughter I was touring. Doing radio interviews. Life was exciting and full of enchantment. I became involved with a young woman I had been talking to since high school on and off. She had always seemed sweet. And a great mother as she had 2 boys of her own. We finally got to meet face to face and had sex. I'm not going to lie. It was amazing. She had it all in my eyes looks, charm, amazing in bed. Willing to do things in bed that most women wouldn't dream of. The third time …

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He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 3 of 3.

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." Read Part 1 and Part 2 When my ex returned to my hometown, his behavior was the worst ever, as I discussed previously. And while I lived around my family, he had distanced us from them. It was only after my oldest son had a nightmare that I was shot (he was 12 yrs old) and my daughter (just 3 yrs old) was afraid from nightmares and wanted to stay with me to sleep, (both episodes occurring within 24 hours) I sought an ex parte against him. I remember telling my children that they'd come to realize it was for the best. Again, it was my 8 yr old son who emphatically stated, "we already know it's …

He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 3 of 3.Read More

He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 2 of 3.

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." Read Part 1. We were working together, but would come home to an environment that continued to whittle away at me. He would leave on the weekends or whenever something happened to a community member. He ignored me physically and emotionally, even if he brought me with him on weekends away. We would stay in his parents' home. He would go out and leave me there, alone. (His parents would take my son into their bedroom and close the door during this time.) I wasted away spiritually and physically. Eventually, my father came over to ask what was happening. He (anyone really) could easily see me …

He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 2 of 3.Read More

He was trying to kill me, and almost did: Part 1 of 3

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Corrine." I'd like to preface my story by describing my childhood. I led a charmed existence. I was smart and idealistic. I chose the field of medicine, despite my passion for writing, because I wanted to see humanity on its most fundamental level. My parents are hard working, and have built an empire from the ground up. As a young woman, I never would have imagined I'd become a victim to domestic violence. Nor did I dream I'd ever divorce. And it didn't happen overnight. There were layers upon layers of abuse that came in many forms, starting as attacks to my self-esteem. When I finally looked up …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Am I a victim of a psychopath?

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a woman from India whom we'll call "Nisa." I had a relationship with a man in the last year. He was in his separation at that time. I gradually fall for him. He told me about his wife and said that she cheated him in a very bad way by involving with another guy and she is not normal, has dual personality disorder. I felt the pain of this person in my heart and gradually became attached to him. As the day passes I started loving him. He said he loves me a lot. 'I fell as a boyfriend, I fell as a husband for you,' this was his language. Till one and a half months things were going good, but after that he became very possessive. He …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I confronted him with what I learned, and was told I was a psychopath

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Editor's note: The following story was sent by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "CatieJane." I just finished reading a book about narcissists, written by a woman that in the book mentioned this site. I have now for several days, considered whether I should write here - and the reason I have doubts. Is that I still have doubts about whether it really is my ex or me that is "crazy" ”¦ I do not live in an English speaking country, I come from Denmark. So if I dont write proper English, I apologize in advance. My story ”¦ For 8 years I have been with my ex. 8 years that has been crazy. When I met him 8 years ago, he was this wonderful, loving, caring man. (Had never seen a man be so …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I confronted him with what I learned, and was told I was a psychopathRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: With the sociopath, nothing made sense

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Editor's note: The following letter was sent by a Lovefraud reader who posts as "Remembertoforget." We met on Facebook, because we had mutual friends/acquaintances. I would see him comment on girls' posts. Funny because I deleted him thinking, I don't really know him. Why have him on here. He sooner or later re-friended me. ”¨I almost dodged a bullet. Perhaps my subconscience was one step ahead. I was depressed when I met him. Two friends had just passed away and I left my long-term boyfriend and was staying at my mom's. He would post stuff that attracted me, and one day I randomly messaged him. I never do that. SAD STORY: He had been upset because his children's mother had left hi …

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Her sociopathic husband: lies, cheating, pornography, burglary, and one day, she fears, revenge

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Gemma." I married my sociopath after a whirlwind long-distance relationship. He swept me off my feet, seemed to love everything I loved. He introduced me to his family, I found soon after he had been married three times before. He said he married his first wife because she was pregnant, his second to get her into the country (she was Columbian), and he married his third wife to give her a feeling of security. I later found out he had cheated on every one of them. He told me he loved me and had saved the best 'til last. Things were OK to begin with, then I started noticing his control. He would tell …

Her sociopathic husband: lies, cheating, pornography, burglary, and one day, she fears, revengeRead More