Last week I happened to read a Dear Abby column in the newspaper. A woman wrote to Abby that she had been married to a man for 15 years who was controlling and manipulative, along with being emotionally, economically and sexually abusive. The letter-writer termed her husband narcissistic and passive-aggressive, but in my view he may be a sociopath.
The woman is filing for divorce. Her dilemma is that her husband projects a “good guy” image, and she fears that if she accuses him of abuse, no one will believe her.
Abby’s advice was to tell a few close girlfriends what really happened. “The truth will spread like wildfire,” Abby wrote.
I wonder if Abby gave good advice for this situation. I’m sure the advice would be helpful under most circumstances. But if this guy is a sociopath, there’s a good chance that he’s already started the smear campaign against his wife—telling people that she’s mentally unbalanced, a terrible mother, and cheating on him.
What do you think?
Read the letter, Truth of abusive marriage will tarnish man’s sterling image. Then tell us if you think Abby’s plan will work.
hens
Hey Erin72 I am a virgo also and somewhat of a neat freak, not as bad as I used to be tho…I thot dear Abby was dead?
Ox Drover
Henry darlink, of course she is dead, that’s her daughter doing the column now—“ear Abby”is like a family business so the daughter is “channeling” the mother Abby with a crystal ball I think! LOL
Glad you are back Hens, we did miss you! Life isn’t the same on LF with you gone. How was colorado? It is miserably hot and humid here and rain every day for a week!
erin1972
Hens-we missed you. I am virgo woman. When is your birthday? Mine is September 19th!
hens
Hi oxy dew – I wish I had been in Co. but I was just east of here, hot and humid and gettin hotter, we have had the wettest July on record here in OK.. the heat index is spose to be 109 tomorrow with the humidity and all.. and the skeeters just love me… I think the OFF and DDT is gonna kill me.. but better than the skeeter bites I swell up like a toad when I get bit, you been doin ok Oxy?
hens
august twenty somethin – we are compatible with capricorns and allergic to scorpios ya know,,,
Ox Drover
Well, or JUNE was the 3rd hottest average temp since they been-a keepin’ records! NO RAIN just 80%+ humidity, according to D’s chart, sometimes (And I’m NOT kidding) heat index >150 degrees!
Rained about half the days this month! Probably 10 inches last week or so—so I spent most of my time INSIDE!!!! I have that great fish-belly glow to my skin but that’s okay, makes the age spots stand out more as a contrast to the fish belly white of the rest of it.
D came home a few days early, slept the first couple of days he was home and brought some kind of viral CRUD home with him so now I’m catchning the COLD from HELL! Gosh its good to have kids!
My best friend is in Colorado and won’t be home til nearly first of august—and I couldn’t go with her into that wonderful COOL place! biatch biatch biatch! Oh, welllllll, guess I need something to complain about!
Oh, well, could be worse! ONe or both of us could be shacked up with a P!!!! So bring on the rain, humidity and the heat! We are P-FREE so anything else is a CAKE WALK!!!!!!
silvermoon
HEY Ox!!!!!!!!!
Cake walk? McArthur Park melting in the humidity?
Cold from hell? NeilMed sinus rinse and Afrin changed my life.
Might be good for you too.
P is reaching out from prison. Am feeling very uncomfortable about it. Guess I expected it. Lawyers jokes aside. They don’t just QUIT do they?
_________________ Lawyers….
erin1972
Ya’ll it’s SO hot here too. It’s upper 90s everyday with 85%plus humidity and it rained everyday for two straight weeks and it might do it again this weekend. I take advantage of each day it’s not raining to get out and exercise. If I weren’t trying to lose so much weight I would have popsicles. I like them made from the daquiri mix too. Jungle juice popsicles are yummy!!!
Ox Drover
Dear Silver,
Yea, I’m the EXPERT on sinus stuff, had 5 (five) surgeries on right maxillary sinus, allergy shots, and the works, and just happen to have my yearly follow up visit to my ENT doc tomorrow for him to put a scope up my nose into the sinus window to see how it is doing, so will have him look at my throat and see what he thinks. D sounds like he is coughting up his left lung in pieces and his head cold part is doing better he says…I’m glad about that!
Yea, he will reach out from prison, and the best thing you can do is to CALL the warden and tell him that the inmate is harassing you by mail and that you do not want contact, and that will be taken care of. Follow that up with a letter to the warden outlining that your x was married to you illegally and attach any paper work you have, and send to the warden. The federal prisons do NOT want any negative publicity at ALL. The state prisons don’t much care, but the Feds do care.
You might also see if you can be NOTIFIED if he is coming up for release so you can get a restraining order on him before he gets out. Might ask the warden’s office about that or when he can be expected up for release.
Did you ever find out what he is in there for? Might be a good idea to find that out, and THAT IS public information.
Well, snif, snif, cough, cough…off to bed.
silvermoon
I can’t find out what he was in for before the felon with a firearm conviction that got him six years indicating what he did before was not insignificant.
His lawful says manslaughter but I’d be surprised if he told her the truth.
The records are sealed. They can be obfuscated like that because there is psychological testimony in the case. I can’t help but wonder.
So no, I’m flyin’ blind.
The neilmed stuff helped me get the hacking cough under control and Tylenol now makes a sever Sinus pill that has a cough suppressant and expectorant in it.
Hope you guys feel better soon! Its been awful with this as you so aptly describe it Head cold from hell!