The American Psychiatric Association is in the process of updating its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the DSM-5. This is the “bible” used by psychiatrists and other mental health professionals to diagnosis psychiatric conditions, including antisocial personality disorder. Two members of the committee working on personality disorders have resigned, stating that the proposal displays a “stunning disregard for evidence.”
Dr. Liane Leedom and I had issues with how the first draft described antisocial personality disorder, which was why we conducted a Lovefraud survey back in 2010. Based on the survey results, we submitted Lovefraud’s  comment about sociopaths for the DSM-5. The description was since revised, but apparently there are professionals who are still dissatisfied.
If the professionals can’t agree, no wonder the rest of us are confused.
Two who resigend from DSM-5 explain why, on PyschologyToday.com.
Hmm…
Boo Moon.
that has a ring to it…
lol: I think “BOO” is an absolutely wonderful name!
Get out the birth certificate and let’s do this.
🙂
Reminds me of the oldie, but goodie: Boo Moon……
lol kim…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTPTa278dZY
do you remember this???
Dances, I love “Boo Moon!” Weiner dawgs are awesome, but they’re too tenacious for me! Little badger-hounds that they are!
skylar:
Thank you for your explanation far above about spath’s emotions and how they “feel” them. So interesting. I learn so much from you.
What a story about the car!! OMG!! It worked out in YOUR favor though so…take that spath…BOOM!
skylar:
You said:
“Louise, emotions are physical sensations and they do have them, they’ve just learned how to ignore them, re-interpret them as something else, or blunt them to the point where they can’t feel them at all.”
Why or how have they “learned” how to ignore, re-interpret or blunt their emotions?
Hello dear friends,
long time 🙂 Hope all of you are doing well 🙂 I’ve been reading here everyday, but being preoccupied by my processes I haven’t had anything to write about.
However today I do 🙂 I’m a bit confused about a girlfriend of mine and I really want to hear your take on this. She is very confusing and I’m looking for sign if she’s a spath or not. Her tactics are very interesting therefor I’ve kept her friendship along for a years time. She has really given me alot of valuable answers to how such people act and think.
Well, this is the story:
She met a guy about a year and half ago and they moved in togheter, but she’s constantly added much drama to the relationship and now he couldn’t take it anymore from her so he broke if off. She moved back home to her parents across the country.
During their relationship she’s done alot of damage, but she blames everyone else for it. She tried to cheat on him several times because she ment he did not giver her as much sex and attention she ment she deserved. She ment he talked to much about his ex girlfriends which made her really insecure of her self. She got the children protective service involved because of alleged sexual child abuse( him as a father) and blamed someone else- he has no idea it was her who made a friend call it in-which she has admitted to me are false clames from her because she was jealous of his daughter. She ment she deserved the attention from him, not his daughter and she wanted him to her self. She’s badmouthed him to every single person she knows because she thinks he has treated her ugly- he didn’t appreciate her enough and those friends have made hell on earth to get her away from him. They are all claiming him for being an abuser and they are planning on suing him. The latest news which shocked me (as usual) was that she filmed him unknowingly during an anger outburst from him and she’s showing it to all of her friends. Her self have said to me that she often would provocate him into anger outburst because she needed to know that he loved her. Mostly of his outburst as far as I understand comes out of her attemts to cheat (he found out), all her drama about his daughter and her badmouthing him to others- even his own friends, her intense clingyness and because of the stress of losing his jobb and almost his daughter and on top of it all he almost lost his rented apartment because of her drama.
While he’s been stressed out about work and his child she’s shown no concern or compassion on his behalf, she’s only been concerned with her own needs. She’s desperately been trying to get as much sex and attention from him as possible and if he didn’t give it to her, she would call other men infront of him and reveal intimate info about her private parts to them just to mention one tactic she uses. As far as I see it, she has only had concern for her self and NO ONE ELSE (not even me for what I’m been going through), and does anything she can to make him angry (she admitted that she does it to get validation and attention). I asked her several times why she was not worried about the children protective service, she said it was not her problem. I would think that if this was my man I would share his concern about the allegations hanging upon him or be suspicious my self, but nope- no nothing- from her AT ALL. She did not think about it because it didn’t bother her, she had forgotten about the whole thing. (wtf????)He has full custody of his daughter with approval from the childs mother because they have a really good relationship. The child can travel between the parents as she her self likes.
What shocked me is that even if the relationship now is over, she claims she still deeply loves him and really want him back- whatever it cost! She’s still smothering him with text and phone calls.
Inspite of this she still keeps showing people the ugly side of him and never once admit what she her self has done. Nobody but me knows. In my country it’s illegal to film someone (or take pic’s for that matter) without people knowing. I did not know she had done this until today and this happened two weeks ago. I lure things out of her, but lately she’s been avoiding to answer me. I ask alot why she does what she does, but she only say’s that it’s either his or her mothers fault (because her mother tries to break them apart after what she’s been telling her mother about him) or if he just had given her what she wanted she would never have done the things she did. She cries and cries over him, leaving me feel empathy for her- but I’m really wondering if it’s real. I’ve began to understand that she keeps the truth away, I also think she lies to me as well and that she actually do know why she does what she does. I can hear it on her voice.
To me she behaves as a child and when I take his side on certain matters she will get angry with me and will answer with ugly remarks like I’m just like him and why I don’t just marry him instead her of and such awful things. She is a really cute girl and she disguises her self with her sweet and vulnerable tone of voice, but I know that she really is revengeful and keeps her darkest thoughts to her self now. I think she knows I can see right through her. She’s also been really paranoid about me calling him and speaking to him. I’ve never met the guy because he (and her) lives across the country (seperate part of the country) from me. It had crossed my mind once if I should have called him, but I decided to wait until the relationship was entirely over and they had no contact, but however, I was not sure if that was the right thing to do so I left the thought alone. Somehow she figured this out and started to cry about it to me. I promised her I wouldn’t call him. However, I still got his phone nb.
What do you guys think? I’m really confused now. On one side she’s the cutest and most compassioned girl, but when I think about the drama she creates it’s really hard to see if she telling the truth about him or if she’s the big liar. Since I don’t know him at all and I’ve only known her for a year it’s hard to see clearly.
Your thought’s much appreciated,
best regards
Sunflower, wat is “confusing” about the way this woman has LIED, MANIPULATED, CHEATED, AND DELIBERATELY HARMED this man? Yet claims to “love him”????? Give me a break. People who LOVE YOU do not treat you in this fashion or hurt you like this.
RUN as far away from this woman as you can and STAY away from this woman or anyone like her.
Learn the RED FLAGS of a psychopath, sunflower, and then when you see even ONE RED FLAG (this woman hhas MANY RED FLAGS) wave, then YOU WAVE–wave bye bye!
Louise,
My ex-spath told me how he dealt with the withdrawal symptoms of quitting smoking. He said he simply turned those feelings into feelings of pleasure, by convincing himself that he loved the pain. Not surprising since spaths pervert reality all the time. They will even lie to themselves so they don’t have to admit that they are in pain, that they are human and that they suffer.
Shame is one of the most uncomfortable emotions to have. People even kill themselves trying to escape shame. So it’s not surprising that people will turn shame into something else to bypass it.
I think that the reason I came up with the word “slime” was so that I didn’t have to feel the projected shame that spaths left on me. I re-named it as “slime” and it felt better than calling it recursive shame which just gets worse and worse the more we ruminate on it.
Humiliated fury is another example of bypassed shame and turning it into fury against the person perceived as having shamed us.
All people learn to bypass emotions, ignore them, re-interpret them etc… Spaths just do it in the extreme, so that they learn not to feel love or empathy or anything at all. With regard to shame, it makes them appear absolutely shameless.
I think that spaths just never learned to manage their uncomfortable emotions and accept them.