Editor’s note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, explains why it gets worse before it gets better when you start your recovery from the sociopath. Read more about Liberty.
By Liberty Forrest
You know how it is when you look around your house and realise it needs a good cleaning? And then you realise it needs a good clearing out, too? You start thinking of everything that’s stashed away in drawers and cupboards, the basement, the attic, shelves and closets, you just know there’s a ton of “stuff” that could stand a good going through.
And you think, “Oh, man, what a lot of work,” and it’s not fun, but it really ought to be done and you just know you’re gonna feel soooo good when it’s finished and you’ve thrown out the junk, and you’ve cleaned, dusted, swept, wiped, etc.
So you start chucking stuff out of the attic, the basement, the drawers and cupboards and in the middle of it, you stop for a cuppa something or a quick lunch. You look around and see that for all your efforts so far, it looks like your house threw up all over itself. You’ve made an absolutely, incredibly enormous mess while everything’s still “in transition” and waiting for you to decide whether it is being kept or sent to the Great Beyond f0r Stuff That’s Not Needed.
And you think, “Hey, I thought I was supposed to be cleaning up the joint! It’s just got a whole lot worse!” And what the heck were you thinking, anyway? You didn’t really want to do all of this! But of course, you remember that it’ll all look and feel better when you’re done but jeez, Louise, this part really sucks…
Well, it can be like this when you’re healing, and that means healing anything, whether physical, mental, emotional or spiritual. And it’s especially true when you’re recovering from the damage caused by a sociopath.
How on Earth Does That Work?
Whenever there is growth and healing, it requires disturbing the stuff that’s sitting there making you sick, unwell or unhappy. Whatever it is that keeps you from moving forward, from progressing and developing, from being creative or fulfilling your potential, that’s what has to be yanked out, and sent to the Great Beyond for Stuff That Needs To Go.
At the very least, if it involves healing the damage caused by sociopaths, you’re likely to have to dredge up a lot of painful moments and memories. Unpleasant, yes. But life-threatening? No. You can and you will get through it, and you’ll be ever so much happier for it.
There are countless stories around the world about what doctors would call “spontaneous” physical healing of ailments or injuries that they said could not be helped. People who should never have been able to walk again, people with terminal illnesses — we hear about these stories that supposedly have no explanation, stories of patients who decided and insisted that they would be well and healed, and then “miraculously,” they are.
In fact, I am one of those people. I healed myself of a significant and life-threatening condition. But that’s another story for a different day.
And okay, we can call it a miracle, if you want. I know I sure did when it my own life on the line. Miracles are wonderful and they bring magic to our lives and they keep us humble by reminding us of the great power and wonder of the Divine, the Universe.
But we can access that power because the Divine Spirit that is within each of us is a part of it and connected to it. We have the ability to bring about great healing within ourselves, and that means healing on all levels.
Why It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better
Once you decide to embark on a path of healing, it is not uncommon for life to get worse before it gets better. When you decide you need to make changes in your life that will make you healthier or happier, the healing path can stir up a lot of dust, whether it’s physical, mental, emotional or spiritual. If you make changes in the way you behave and the choices you make, some of them may be painful or uncomfortable, but if they are ultimately of benefit to you, then the discomfort is well worth it.
Sometimes it means stirring up old memories, old feelings, long-forgotten wounds that lay buried, covered in dust somewhere inside you, silently causing damage without you even knowing about it. But it’s good to take them out into the light. Clean them up, see if there’s some value in them. Occasionally, old stuff that’s hidden away in attics is discovered to have great worth.
It might mean letting go of friendships or relationships that aren’t adding anything positive to your life, or that have become a more negative influence than anything else.
It might mean letting go of lifestyle habits that are easy or that you enjoy, but that are contributing to health problems or keeping you from being happy. There are many ways in which life might get worse before it gets better, but if you’re aiming to create the beautiful life you desire and deserve, it’s all worth it. Especially if you’re cleaning up the fallout after a sociopath has ripped through your world like a hurricane.
No Pain, No Gain
I know it seems easier to just do that original clean-and-tidy job you had in mind and leave all the cupboards and drawers, the attic and basement for “someday” because it’s an enormous and miserable job.
But “no pain, no gain” is the truth in matters of healing. Whether it’s healing your body, your relationships, or any other significant part of your life, you can expect that it will get worse before it gets better, as things are disturbed, cleaned out, or dusted off, and you decide whether to keep or discard them.
But although it might feel like your life is throwing up all over itself, like your house does during those “spring cleans,” just know that a healing path is always the right path, even if — and in fact, especially if — the result means that you and your life get very much better.
This article was originally published at LibertyForrest.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.