Ever since Lovefraud launched in 2005, my goal has been to educate people about the dangers of sociopaths—preferably before their lives are shredded. One effort in that direction is the Lovefraud high school education program—I’ll be doing my first three classes next month.
Another effort is my next book—tentatively called Red Flags of Love Fraud—Signs that you’re dating a sociopath. It will identify behavior that may indicate a prospective romantic partner is not all that he or she claims to be, and explain how what seems to be expressions of love may, in fact, be strategies of manipulation and control.
We’ve discussed our experiences here on Lovefraud, and through the telling, identified many behaviors that all seem to “come from the same playbook.” However, I’d like to collect that information in a more structured way so that I can use it in the book. Therefore, I invite you to participate in the Lovefraud Romantic Partner Survey.
Most of the questions are multiple choice, but there are a few places where you can write out your observations. It would probably be best to do the survey when you have about 20 minutes of free time.
Thank you for your contributions. To start the survey, click the following link:
LL, personally, it didn’t take as long as three months. I would say it actually took a little less than two months for him to take all my money.
And as in Candy’s case, I still do feel stupid about it even though it happened three years ago.
I will do the survey just as soon as I can. It would be great if there was a booklet that could be handed out to students… like the ones they gave us about sex ed when we were kids.
Two things I hope that will be in there.
Q. My boyfriend wants to know where I am at all times. That means he really loves me, right?
A. No!!! It means he wants to control you!
Wisdom Corner: When a person doesn’t take “no” for an answer, they are violating your boundaries. DANGER!!
And lastly, Donna, you might want to tap into Domestic Violence cirriculums. The local DV Agency (www.Nextdoor.org) in my area has a teen group called “Healthy Relationships.”
I suspect you already thought of that. :O)
Aloha
Aloha,
I’d like to build on that too, Donna. Community medical clinics. Well, shoot medical clinics everywhere! Booklets would be WONDERFUL!
Also, colleges. There are MANY sociopaths in the college arena.
My daughter ran into quite an unpleasant few. Even as professors.
LL
Donna,
What about online dating sites? Given that this avenue is filled with sociopaths, (mine included) perusing for their next victims, how can the Ten Signs You’re Dating a Sociopath be implemented onto those sites? Or is it even possible?
Just curious.
LL
I need to change my user name. Something came up on my computer today that made me feel very uncomfortable.
I also need to change my email addy here. I don’t know how to get into my account to do that. Any suggestions?
Thank you.
LL
I did it. :O)
I didn’t realize he was that bad of an S until I answered the question in the survey. Everything was a extreme. Not an N, but a not so great functioning S. How did I get involved with someone like this? I know better!
Jen,
I hear ya! Doing that survey kind of opend up some old wounds. It still gets me mad that he did something like this to me.
It felt good doing this survey – when I divorced 6 years ago I had to tell it to my lawyer. She was in disbelief as to all the things he had done. I felt like such a loser – until I started reading this site and finally had a diagnosis as to who he really is. Nobody understands what these people are capable of until you have actually been through it.
I did it – do I get a BoZo button?