Jimmy Savile was one of the most well-know stars of British television. Everyone knew he was eccentric and many people apparently knew he was also a sexual predator who targeted young girls for decades.
Jimmy Savile scandal on BBC.co.uk.
‘If we blabbed on Jimmy, the family would have been left with nothing’: Savile’s abused great niece tells how paedophile DJ bought his relatives’ silence, on DailyMail.co.uk.
Britain’s Jimmy Savile abuse scandal: how could his crimes have gone unnoticed for so long? on WashingtonPost.com.
Links supplied by a Lovefraud reader.
[youtube_sc url=http://youtu.be/6nHDZfSl36g]
KatyDid:
The British accent does do something to people; especially his. It is not cockney. It’s the charming, sexy northern England accent. At least to me it was. Plus, he had that very soft voice…it was hypnotizing. Yes, I believe it did make him sound civilized and intelligent when really he is neither. Sad.
Skylar,
You are very correct about the soap. She gave it to me in front of a group of people. I grew up selecting friends with large families as I believe I felt the need to belong and I was always so curious about family dynamics. I longed for what I thought they had. One of them had 5 sisters and a brother. The brother was a kind person who I should’ve given more attention. His sisters were always telling me what a player he was so I kept my guard up. One day he asked me why I let his sisters treat me so badly? That was the day I stopped owning their crap.
The same thing happened with the soap woman. A large family I grew up with and now they are all out of my life. I felt a great loss but I am positive they are a family of spaths. When I came across that soap in a cupboard years later, it hurt me again!! Stupid right?!
My counselor just a month ago said the same thing you just said only about my mom, “she’s projecting her feelings on to you”. Sliming me. It’s a rude awakening. Having your eyes slammed open like that! All of sudden you realize you are a spath magnet and the drama in my life was me bringing it in. My addiction to that turmoil from growing up in turmoil thinking it’s friggin normal.
I can honestly say, I see my daughter with a sparkle in her eye when things get stirred. I have intentionally kept things as calm as possible as I didn’t want to feed it. I called it “the wild hair syndrome” before I knew about the spath factor. lol
They can’t stand to see anyone happy and work to mess it up if they can. Thus your spath makes sure to end the happiness of someone who has nothing to do with him except on some benign level, like the couple who suffers the plain crash.
I have no idea where the expression, “Boys will be boys,” comes from, but when I read about Romney leading the pack and bullying that kid in prep school, my blood went cold (as it did when I read about the dog on the car roof) because that is how it was explained, boys will be boys.
At this point, I believe not taking women and sexual abuse seriously is due to it being a monied, elistist thing.
Back in the times of serfs, the lord slept with the serf bride on the night of her marriage. There was a name for that, which I forget, but basically what it came down to was power.
When you have elitist men judging everybody “including their peers” and giving themselves the privilege of sleeping with the serf bride (raping her under the guise of a feudal lord’s right,) of course there is a lot of nudge, nudge, wink, wink going on. They’re stacking everything in their favor.
I have never lived in England, but I knew Brits and Australians from when I lived in Norway. They are far more tolerant and excusing of eccentric or odd behavior than we would ever be in the US. Why? I do not know.
Cultures vary.
For instance, Scandinavian women are equal with men and have been for centuries because when the Vikings went off to sea, they were gone six months to three years at a time.
The Vikings came home long enough to repair and outfit their ships (six months to a year or so) and off they went again. This left women, the elderly, the sick, and children at home. The women took care of what would have been considered traditional male work in other societies such as the farming and running whatever else was around.
There was a lot of respect for women that continues to this day. No whore and Madonna mindset either.
I read an account of a Viking woman who was in this position (husband off on the ship and left alone to run the family farm) being raped by a small ground of renegade men. She collected a group of her farmhands and other men to support her and rode after her rapists. They found them and killed them. The story ends with her using the skulls of her rapists as weights and their entrails as yarns as she sang her victory song while she wove on her loom. Guess it’s all about what you’re willing to accept.
Eralyn,
I don’t know but I’m not sure that the husband was not in on the “accident”. Remember, he inherited everything when she died.
The fact that the spath went on and on about the love between them was very strange. On the other hand, I DO know that he was doing it to rub it in my face because OUR relationshit sucked and by this time, HE never showed any love toward me. He showed only disdain for me. So it was so STRANGE to hear him come home and blather on about somebody else’s relationship.
Which is why I say that all spaths are the same. Somehow, he couldn’t fathom that this was bizarre behavior on his part. He had a great mask sometimes and then at other times, he failed miserably to imitate an actual human being.
Of course, they count on the fact that we are unaware of this “condition” of spathy, so I couldn’t guess WHY he didn’t resemble a human being sometimes.
In my innocence though, I did do one thing right: I pretended not to notice. This effectively sabotaged his ability to perfect his mask. lol!! Since I didn’t say anything, he assumed I was eating it up. It is my hopes that as more people are educated, we make the effort to shun the spaths so they can’t mirror us and will never learn to imitate a human being.
No you aren’t stupid that the soap memory hurt. It just does. Regardless of whether we know that they are spaths or not. That hurt, is a good thing, IMO. It is a feeling that will protect you. That’s what pain is for. To warn you that there is danger. If someone would hurt your feelings with malice, what ELSE are they capable of doing to you? I’m so glad that you and I have learned to respect the hurt feelings and protect ourselves. Although the hurt is a good thing, it needs to be tended to with love. (((Eralyn)))
Eralyn,
I am of the same note about the soap woman. Projecting. Drama Queen. Like Skylar says, they are addicted to drama. At least my X!husband was… Although he also tightly controlled his image, so he didn’t want to be INSIDE the drama, rather he enjoyed setting it up and sitting back to watch whatever unfold. He also was big on never being held accountable, so by staying out of the fray, he could claim that he didn’t know someone would take a friendly joke so personally. However, if the drama didn’t hit a peak, like when I refused to participate, he didn’t let it go. No, not my dearest. He ALWAYS ratcheted it up UNTIL.
All that I learned about him, has been hindsight. Until those last few years, I was a fruitbasket trying to figure out wtf was going on. It really messed me up. But now, I’ve got him pegged, yep, SO predictable.
Hello GIS
The term your thinking about is “prima notte”(first night)
There’s a relevant scene in Braveheart where the english sherriff makes his claim. Yes, it’s an abuse of power.
If you have the time, watch Louis Theroux, who did a documentary on Jimmy Savile, Louis Theroux meets Jimmy Savile’ its on youtube.
JS was a spath/pedo, everyone knew what he was. What is particularly revolting about this individual is that he abused children, very sick children in hospital, some with terminal illnesses. Ditto he met and appeared to have a relationship with some of the UK’s worst murders including the Yorkshire Ripper who murdered and raped 13 women Peter Sutcliff. PS was imprisoned in Broadmoor, JS was apparently given the keys to this so called high security prison.. granted only in the UK!
Do watch Louis Theroux, who is an amazing journalist, a bit of an English twit to some over the pond …but very, very intelligent and knows exactly what this thing is. LT has done quite a bit of the same thing in the US ..swingers, porn ‘stars’, white supremist …etc
I can assure you having been to see James ..James Bond tonight …we do drink lots of tea .. granted ..we love our dogs more than people..and for some Jerusalem was built on these dark satanic hills ..but we aint any different than any other nation ..other than perhaps our sense of humour.
If you want to watch a real spath at work, check out Conrad Black ..what a guy .. BBC iplayer catch up Friday night ‘Have I got News for you’ ..they are everywhere ..convicted criminal ..and still denying it ..unbelievable ..
((hugs))
movingon,
I totally love Theroux’s style. He just gives people all the rope they want, but always remains respectful, gallant, interested and gentlemanlike to people.
It’s a bit early, but well you’re the only ones I can speak about early feelings. Two nigths ago a friend of mine had her birthday party. She always has a theme for her parties: this year it was animals. I was one of the many cats, lol. Two years ago I talked and met a couple who I had great conversations with. At the time though I was in the end period with ex-spath (the devaluing phase). I met them again at the New Year party in the same period, but not anymore afterwards until two nights ago. Especially the husband was pleased to see me. I talked with his wife of course plenty and then him. We ended up exchanging phone numbers and I was invited to join them last night with their friends to a club. But I had a hangover (well foremost of being out until 6am in the wee hours) though that when the wife rang me yesterday evening I said I was just gonna watch the movie and go to bed afterwards.
I do plan to see that couple again when the opportunity strikes, but there are a few things I’m now being reserved about. It’s ok that the man told me that he felt I was one of those persons he and his wife felt was possible befriending material. But at some point it just started to feel a bit weird. He emphasised it was because I treated both him and his wife well… that unlike other women I wasn’t unkind to her…And I had this thought – why would anyone be unkind to her, especially a woman, and why would he bring it up. And he also emphasised them liking me so much repeatedly, like surely 5 times in between conversation, and mentioning a ‘connection’… It started to feel as if he was lovebombing me but then over friendship. At some point I started to wonder when he’d bring up a threesome in the future or something. He also inquired after my availability: in the case one of his single friends might be interested in me after the possible future event he introduced me to them.
And there was another strange thing he said to me: he’s an accountant like my father. Suddenly he said to me that if I ever needed someone to talk about finances, but would prefer my dad not to know of it, I could always come to him. I told him that I had no financial secrets with my parents and was making sure I had no reason to be secretive about it (though we respect each other’s privacy). But then he repeated it again: just in case…
Anyway, I’ll probably agree to meet them again. I like the wife for sure, and perhaps he was just a bit drunk. Just in case though I’ll prefer it only once I have a car again first (mine was totaled a month ago as I was in the middle of a chain accident because of some total irresponsible driver who decided to go left from the most right lane, forced the one before me to hit the breaks, I hit the breaks and bumped him on a wet road on less than 10 km/hour, but the woman behind me hit me harder and I was harmonicized in the middle of it). I also plan any next meeting to be on neutral ground or with a lot of company.
I didn’t feel like there were red flags, but at some point I felt the potential of red flags and I want room and space to watch out for that.
Darwinsmom,
there were some red flags, imo. First he told you that he felt a connection. That is a love bomb. The question of your being single was a red flag. The accounting thing was completely boundary crossing! He was trying to get you to “share a secret”.
If you decide to meet them again PLEASE be careful what you share with them about your living arrangements and even your lack of transportation. And yes, lots of company, with a ride home as well.
A predator with a wife/minion is even more frightening than a guy alone, because it indicates that he has the ability to convince others to do evil. She is his facade that he uses to make you feel safe. The fact that he brought up how other women are unkind to her, is a red flag too, it makes no sense to share that with you.
If you do go out with them, wear gray!
He’s been telling me the “connection” thing actually the previous two times I met them as well. And I like the wife better than I do him. He’s easy to talk with, but quite occupying/taxing… that is: he won’t stop, and you can neither dance or talk to someone else anymore. Previous two times I didn’t think much of the word ‘connection’, but this time it did ring a bit of a tinklebell in me, the “secret” word even made a bigger tinklebell ring. And at some point I thought, “this is an attempt at flattery”. I wanted to wave it off more and more, because there’s no need for it. She’s much more relaxing and natural imo.
Cat’s out of the bag though: they know it’s over with the ex-spath, and they gave me a lift home.
But you’re right, there are some hints of red flags in there… that’s why I mentioned them. And I made note of the things that made me feel uncomfortable and made me think: this seems somewhat inapropriate or strange to ask or mention.