By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired)
Psychopaths sometimes don’t know enough about how the rest of the world thinks to tell a “good” lie. I saw the following article about North Korea’s soccer team and how they had been apparently caught in a doping scandal, but were claiming that it was really an herbal medication that made them test positive for steroids.
The excuse given was that the team members had been struck by lightening and they had decided, heroically, to compete anyway. The steroids were accidentally taken with traditional Chinese medicines.
I have recently found other articles about the “stories” of the North Korean leader, Kim Jong-II, that made me laugh out loud. In one article, he supposedly played his first round of golf and scored a 38, including five holes-in-one.
One of the things I have noticed about many psychopaths, and others who frequently lie, is that their lies are so “off the wall” that no one over three years old would believe a word of them. They will “lie when the truth will fit better” is a saying I’ve heard all my life. This seems to be especially true with pathological liars and psychopaths.
Dr. Robert Hare, well-known psychopathy researcher, says that psychopaths have difficulty realizing that their lies are unbelievable, even when the evidence that they are untrue is literally in front of them. In some way, the two sides of their brains can’t connect the evidence in front of their eyes.
An example of this are the lies told by Casey Anthony when she led the police to the place she supposedly worked, even going to a cubical, when she knew that she didn’t work for that company. She also lied about leaving her daughter with “Zanny the Nanny,” when such a person didn’t exist. Anthony even led the police to the door of the empty apartment with the police in tow.
Not all liars are psychopaths, but all psychopaths are liars. Liars signal that they are not to be trusted. But if you hear a lie that is so outrageous that it makes you laugh out loud, or have the feeling that the person telling it must be “crazy—”look out! You very well may be dealing with a psychopath.
Ox Drover
FAD your X reminds me of a guy who is not sure of his own “manlyness”—-like him shaving Junior’s head so he won’t look like a hippie, etc.—so he puts up this fake exterior of being so male and in CONTROL.
I think a lot of people who watch the violent TV and movies, especially “macho guys” have problems along this line. Maybe I’m just prejudiced, but I prefer movies that have a PLOT line and a “story” other than beating someone’s head in or blood and guts.
skylar
FAD, AFAIK, spath doesn’t read much because he can’t.
But he likes violent movies and horror films.
FightClub was a good film, IMO, but Choke just seemed nasty, so I didn’t want to see it. Anyway, I just looked it up and it seems interesting.
http://www.randomhouse.com/features/palahniuk/behind.html
FightAnotherDay
Skylar,
Yup. Mine subjected me to “SAW I, II, III, and IV!
Movies I would never had seen on my own or with anyone I know.
YIKES!
souljourner
A quick trip to Wikipedia to read the sketchy details of David Berkowitz’s life tells me he is still fooling a lot of people with his claim to have found Christianity. I believe he uses it the same way he used Satanism in his early years.
I was not at all surprised to find out he was adopted. His mother was a piece of work. He ended up with a seemingly nice family but little could they know by then the damage was done. The die was likely cast. Nothing will traumatize a human being like an infant being denied their birth mother. It is the first and most damaging wound and it teaches that infant to detach in survival mode. Adoptions should come with automatic counseling as soon as children are walking and talking.
Psycho/sociopaths don’t change. If we’ve learned something the rest of the world hasn’t yet, it is that THEY DO NOT CHANGE. What would they change into? All the sudden they understand feelings and remorse? No. They just get better at hiding their afflictions.
FightAnotherDay
Oh, and about the link Sky,
Jerkface told me about a month after his escapades came out, well, I “figured” them OUT; that he was a sex addict.
I don’t know why he would have just fessed up. I think it was a back-ash-wards pity ploy.
When I later talked to his X-GF she said he had also said the same when caught.
Ox,
Come to think of it, most of the movies he brought home were plot-less, like “Crank” unless someone told him to rent it, then he got “7 Pounds”, which was a great movie,
BUT, that was also after I had begun to catch onto the affair.
yuck. all I can say is: ………………………………
G’night girls.
I have been surfing the web WAY too much tonight.
skylar
I read another article on Berkowitz, which I can’t find now, but he was saying how truly sorry he is for what happened.
He never refers to it as “what I did”. He always calls it, “what happened” as if he had nothing to do with it.
Typical spath tell. He is not taking responsibility and it shows in the choice of words.
It is too bad that he had to suffer the loss of his mother as an infant, but it’s too late to pity him, since he disposed of his own humanity.
souljourner
Skylar, those are EXACTLY the kinds of clues to look for. Excellent catch!
skylar
thanks Soul,
that was a flaming red flag for me. They do tell us, we just need to hear it, instead of filling in the story with our assumptions.
MoonDancer
I am crushed to hear about Morgan Freeman cheating on his wife with his cousin? I will never look at a penguin the same again…
Oh Louise I would love to see a photo of your X…my X looked and acted like James Dean but my x is still alive as far as I know…aint that something, he could be dead and I would never know about……
Back_from_the_edge
oh yes, selfishness can lead to spathism; I truly believe that. If we allow that excess to control us. We have to stay in the middle here with our thinking on all of this. People used to caution me: “Don’t stay in that too long, you will end up just like him!” I suppose I could have, very easily, considering the extensive mind control and manipulation being done. But, I CHOSE different for myself. Yah, it hurts ending something that I was so ‘bonded’ to. BUT: it would hurt A LOT more if I had chose to STAY in that very toxic relationship. I would be DEAD right now if I had continued to hang onto that relationship. There is no doubt in my mind. As it is, I may fall prey to this predator. Shallow values and beliefs. Oh yes, one of the marks of a spath. They find horrible things funny and openly laugh at others’ misfortunes. Especially ours.
Yes, there was nothing nice about my x sp at all. Oh sure, the gaslighting and lovebombing was awesome but once that facade fell down, wow, I could sure see “IT” for what it was. Trust me.
I believe they are evil spawns.