Stories in the newspaper yesterday were disheartening. After reading them, I had to conclude that full-blown sexual predators are everywhere, and doing something about them will be difficult.
The first story I found was about Canadian Col. Russell Williams, an elite pilot who was commander of Canadian Forces Base Trenton, the largest air force base in the country. In 2005 he was photographed with Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Phillip. On February 7, 2010, he was charged with murdering a young woman who had been missing for almost a week.
That’s not all. Williams, considered a “shining bright star” in the military, has been charged with the murder of two women, sexual assault of two other women, and 82 break-ins. What did he steal? Women’s panties. An Ottawa newspaper reported that police seized more than 500 pairs from his home.
The charges have shocked the Canadian military. Retired Major Greg McQuaid wrote reports that helped Williams get promoted. McQuaid’s observation, however, is telling:
“I remember he had a very focused stare or look, and I was just reminded of that when this happened and they showed the photos of him and I said, there’s that look. I remember that look. It was like he’s looking through you at the back of your head,” McQuaid said.
To read about this incredible story, click on these links:
Canada top commander charged with murder, assault, on Philly.com.
The secret life of Colonel Russell Williams, on Macleans.ca. This story discusses psychopaths at the end.
Another story in the Sunday paper was about another sexual predator in the Catholic Church—this one from Brazil. A Polish priest, Marcin Michael Strachanowski, is accused of sexually abusing a 16-year-old former altar boy, and then threatening to kill the youth if he spoke of it.
According to news reports:
Judge Alexandre Abrahao Dias said that investigators found “erotic material sent to the victim via Internet to seduce him” and that the priest also took other youths to the parish house, “which he converted into a kind of erotic dungeon where he submitted them, often with the use of handcuffs, to orgies.”
To read about this case, see:
Polish priest accused of running pedophile ”˜dungeon,’ in the Montreal Gazette.
Priest charge cites ”˜erotic dungeon,’ on Philly.com.
The Canadian colonel is being prosecuted. The priest has been arrested, and the diocese of Rio de Janeiro didn’t cover up the incident. It immediately suspended the priest and expressed regret over the alleged abuse.
These guys have been caught. Given the nature of their crimes, if proven guilty, they’ll probably go to prison for a long time.
Ten days ago, a sex offender in California, John Gardner III, was sentenced to life in prison for raping and murdering 17-year-old Chelsea King and 14-year-old Amber Dubois.
California lawmakers are now considering a bill, nicknamed Chelsea’s Law, that would mandate life sentences for some child molesters and lifetime parole for others. It’s a great idea—but it will cost a lot of money.
After the first 10 years, keeping the predators in jail would cost tens of millions of dollars, according to a California corrections department analysis. But the Legislative Analyst’s Office, which provides fiscal and policy analysis to the California Legislature, puts the cost much higher—at hundreds of millions of dollars.
Read the article here:
California bill aimed at molesters would cost millions, on Google.com.
Last week, Lovefraud reported that the Supreme Court upheld a law to keep sex offenders in jail after their sentences are served. People who commit crimes like these deserve to spend their lives in jail. But is our society willing to pay for it?
Here is another link to ANN BRADLEY”S newsletter.
This one is about Manipulation.
She also recommeds a few books I have never heard of.
http://hosted.verticalresponse.com/176286/6a0f4b38d9/17000054/cff51598b2/
Erin you are very intuitive..if he was putting pot leaves in a salad then no tellin what else he exposed your kid’s too. I am glad he is out of their lives {he is isnt he?} And good advice on having that one visual to pull up anytime we start doubting or questioning our resolve. I have about one hundred visuals to fall back on so I guess I am covered..Happy Holidays to you and all LF peeps….
Hens….NOT pot leaves IN a salad….a POT LEAF SALAD (only pot leaves)!!!
Yes……he’s out of their lives….although…..he feels he ‘lost’ his posessions……so he’s not gone for good i’m sure.
Kids want NOTHING to do with him…..NC for I think 2.5 years….
The restraining order is up in a few weeks…….so things may change with the contact thing (on his side).
He’s also still sending his cronies to do his ‘work’……
NOW he’s back in Fl. There is still a chance he can get eaten by a shark!!!!!!
That’s the kind of NC i’d appreciate!
One step,
That was an amazing reply, it really spoke the truth. I can get so caught up in what he says because it plays on my emotions and empathy. Telling me I’m cold and unforgiving while his discussions about honesty have my head spinning. Call in the mother ship, beam him up.
Your idea about focusing on one thing that he did that was terrible helps me stay with it and not get sucked in to the madness. ErinB’s story about pot salad is about her ex abusing their children. I’m so happy for her that he is out of her life, hoping he won’t come around after the order of protection expires. Sounds like Erin really has her stuff together.
All of his crap is ambient and subversive. If I don’t want to hug him I’m being ‘cold’ or ‘hard’. If I don’t want him to touch me I’m not loving. I ask him to give me space and he comes close to touch me. I tell him not to touch me and badgers me with “I just love you so much, I need to touch you”. I ask him many times a day that I want to have perspective and need my space. He seems to try harder just to touch me, be close because he says he loves me. This is truely driving me mad. It’s like I’m a doll, not really real, and the doll has no voice.
I’m keeping this advice on my favorites because I really need to come back to it to be reminded of the resolve I’m going to have to conjure up to get the heck out of this mess.
I was completely invisible and invalidated for a very long time, he would throw me a bone sometimes to reel me back in, so why can’t he just flipping give up.
HopeForJoy:
It seems like he’s toying with you, especially if you want space and he keeps trying to touch you.
You are trying to establish a boundary, and he keeps disregarding it.
He’s toying with you.
Rosa,
You’re right about that, he definately doesn’t respect my boundaries. He tries harder to convince me of his love when I try and establish distance.
He is probably toying with me, I don’t know what he is trying to get out of it. But his mind is disordered, I can’t figure out the reasons for any of his actions.
Like Wini said “He is the lie”. Everything about him is a lie, he wears a mask.
Dear Hope, I think you HAVE your situation! Just think that he is NOT RESPECTING you A BIT by just SAYING “I love you” but not LIVING UP TO IT it by invading your private space although you repeatedly and clearly said NO! It is a gross disrespect and a transgression and a sign of dominance and NOT OF LOVE, specially in that context.
You wrote: “It’s like I’m a doll, not really real, and the doll has no voice.”
YOU ARE NOT A DOLL! PERIOD! When he wants a doll, he must go to “Toys R us” or the like! And you want nothing from men who want to play with dolls! I presume you prefer a grown-up man who treats others with respect any person deserves.
Whenever you want to give in, say to yourself: I am not a doll to toy with!
YOU DO NOT WANT THIS HORRIBLE FEELING IN YOUR LIFE, EVER!
((((Hugs))))
Dear Libelle,
You’re right, I don’t like feeling this way and I have to keep on the path that I have started. I think being under the control of someone for so long of a period, I still have self doubt about being assertive and knowing the truth.
The feeling like a doll analogy is most likely because he has never listened to me and still isn’t but is using the word ‘love’ all the time to cloud my judgement.
He is like a little boy and I can’t help him. He doesn’t want help. My daughter told me what her dad said to her before she went to her friends house on Friday. He said that we were getting along great (what planet is he on), daugter told him to quit lying, he was really quiet and told her to “be careful, you are interfering”. What a first class a-hole. She knows whats up and no sees his lies first hand. She is handling it pretty well, has really written him off therefore it wasn’t as hurtful. He used to tell me to “be careful” many times. He can take that and put it where the sun don’t shine!!!!!!
Dear Hope, I copied a link to another “Doll’s house”. It is an old play by Henrik Ibsen, and you see it is a VERY old problem. As Nora did, you can do it too!
Just keep walking, and blow away all the clouds! You can be proud of yourself!! (((Hugs)))
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Doll%27s_House