By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired)
I don’t have much use for people who lie ”¦ but sometimes I have resorted to it myself, and today was one of those days.
You know, sometimes psychopaths are sort of like a sexually transmitted disease, they are the “love that keeps on giving in a negative way,” it seems, forever.
What brought me to telling a lie, because it was just more believable than the truth, was a convoluted story about the “Trojan Horse Psychopath” who infiltrated my family. This man is a three-time convicted child molester who had been a former cell mate and friend to my son, Patrick Alexander, who is in prison in Texas for murder. My son had sent him to infiltrate our family as a “friend,” and position himself to be able to kill me and take over our family resources. The Trojan Horse Psychopath had worked on my farm and helped out with my elderly family member, and thus gained access to my home and sneaked into my personal documents.
I’m a meticulous record keeper, and very organized with my record keeping, and pretty well know how to lay hands on any document I need instantly. I have a fire safe in my office that is never locked, because it is small enough to steal and carry off. I have a sign on the front of it that reads, “There is nothing of any value in this safe, the combination is X-Y-Z, it contains only business documents I want to protect from fire.”
Vehicle titles
The titles to my several vehicles and trailers that are used around the farm are, and have been for years, kept in the slot on the inside of the door to the safe. Since I haven’t bought or sold any vehicles or trailers (except for the recreational vehicle I bought to live in when I fled my home in the summer of 2007), I had not had any cause to go through any of these titles, or even count them, until yesterday. I decided to sell a Conestoga wagon, and the flat-bed trailer that I used to transport it, so I went to the safe to get out the title to the trailer and it was gone! Going through the titles there, I realized that four of the titles to various vehicles and trailers were missing!
The Trojan Horse Psychopath had been arrested in August 2007, when he and my son’s wife tried to kill my oldest biological son, after my son discovered they were having an affair, so he hadn’t had access to my documents since several months before his arrest. But prior to then, he had stolen documents and “messed with” my credit card accounts, my cell phone account, and other items that kept me spinning in my insanity. He would order items off “late night television” and have them sent to my house, like those “Send me $49 and I will make you a real estate millionaire,” and those “clubs” for music and videos that are like the Mafia, once in you can never get out! He even signed me up for interest in Scientology, and I still get tons of mail filling up my post office box from that group. He took over my cell phone account and deleted my contact numbers and added and deleted services and turned it on and off.
Nice ladies
So today when I had to go to the department of motor vehicles to request the replacement of four vehicle and trailer titles, there was no way I was going to tell this tale of woe to the nice ladies behind the desk. There was no way they would have believed me if I had told them the truth of why I needed that many titles replaced, so I took the easy way out and I lied. (So shoot me!)
I told them that my grandkids had been playing “office” and had gotten into my important papers and destroyed them. The nice ladies believed my lie and I paid my fees and the titles should come in the mail in just a few days.
I sort of feel guilty about telling the nice ladies the lie, but there was no way they were going to believe that a pedophile ex-convict from Texas got into my documents and randomly destroyed and stole some of them just to mess with my mind. Maybe I should have used this as a “teaching opportunity” to educate these women about psychopaths (I was the only customer in the office with three nice ladies), but I had to be quick in order to get to the court hearing of the ex-minister of our little country church who had been arrested for child pornography and Internet stalking of a child. I didn’t want to explain to them why I was in such a hurry either.
Here’s the news story on HarrisonDaily.com:
Man, 58, arrested after Internet sting: Agri inspector
Predator in court
I didn’t want to miss his court date, and as it turned out, I was the only one from my community there. He was, I believe, very shocked to see me walk into the courtroom in the small country town about a hour and a half drive north of where I live. I was dressed very nicely in my “pillar of the community matron goes to court or funerals” ensemble. Court had not yet convened and people were quietly talking among themselves in the spectator section of the room.
As I walked by where he was seated, waiting for his turn in front of the judge, I slapped him cheerfully on the back and said, “Hi, Dicky, what are you doing here?” I didn’t wait for a response, but kept on purposefully walking and sat down a couple of rows directly behind him, where he couldn’t see me unless he turned around in his seat, which he didn’t do, but sat facing forward, looking neither to the right or the left. None of his family was there, and though most of the defendants in the courtroom seemed to have friends or family with them, no matter what the charges were. He was alone. I don’t doubt that he felt my eyes boring into the back of his neck.
I never did particularly like this man, even when he was preaching at our little community church. His messages always seemed to me to be shouted and angry, rather than uplifting and loving. He presented an angry God, not a loving father. In fact, several months after my husband’s accidental and very sudden death, I was very sensitive to shouts or loud talking, and I actually went to this man privately and asked him very nicely (I thought) to “tone it down,” and to shout less, and maybe the attendance at our little church might stop dropping. My request was not received well, needless to say.
He did, however, embrace the Trojan Horse Psychopath and my (now ex) daughter-in-law, both before and after their arrests for trying to kill my oldest son. My requests (before their arrests and afterwards) went unheeded, and I was basically told not to bother him, he was “too busy” to get involved in my problems.
Sixth sense
It really isn’t all that noble of me to glory in the downfall of those that I don’t like, but at the same time, it is validation of my “sixth sense” about people. Almost every time I have ignored my dislike of someone there has been something, somewhere down the line, that has validated my “spidey sense” about that person. Several times that “something” has been child molestation or murder, or all of the above, though at the time I felt the intuitive dislike for that person, I never dreamed that they would molest children or be responsible for someone’s death. I just thought, “I don’t like that person,” or, “there’s something about them I don’t trust.”
It is important, I think, that we listen to our intuition about predators, and believe me, psychopaths are predators on two legs. They camouflage themselves and try to blend into the landscape just like a lion does, but there is something within us that, if we listen to it, will many times protect us. If we “turn it off” or “tune it out,” however, it can’t protect us from the predators. Just like the antelope must be alert for the lion, we must be alert for the psychopaths that prowl the savannas of our lives. When we get a whiff of “there’s a predator about,” we must honor that intuition in order to survive. Even if no one else would believe it!
🙂
Couldn’t resist hens…..
Skylar, you’re right that he never seemed evil to me. He still doesn’t. One of our mutual friends said he was just to affable not to like. Another one of his friends told him that he had made everyone around him into lost souls who cling to his identity. I think the last one was exaggerating a little. He likes to be dramatic and get under husband’s skin. But husband does have a way with people. I don’t think he notices.
But he’s never tried to pretend that he was a saint. He said his politesse enhances his evil, or some crap like that. But it does. It’s sooo eerie when he calmly and politely destroys someone emotionally and still considers them a friend, even when they hate him. I can tell now when he’s just arguing with someone for fun and when he’s intentionally trying to hurt someone. He gets this look in his eye, and it gives me chills.
My mom had problems with alcohol. She wasn’t a full blown alcoholic, and she was functional. She was strict, but she wasn’t abusive or anything, not like husband’s father. She’s in recovery now, but it’s been hard for her since my dad died. So, no, I wouldn’t say my childhood was bad at all. It wasn’t perfect, but whose is? My parents were both spiritual, they believed in God, but they weren’t the church going type. And I’m an atheist. I got into a relationship with my ex because he was the trouble-maker and I wanted to help him. I thought he needed me, so I stayed. That was my problem. I felt that I needed to help everyone. And at the same time, I was rebelling against my mom. Just angsty teenager stuff.
Ex Umbris,
Many of us are “caregivers” to others—and the psychopaths use the Pity Ploy to get us sucked into “helping” them. Many enablers are also children of alcoholics or their enablers, and I think it sets us up to be victims. We don’t have good boundaries for the behavior we allow from others. We find excuses for their bad behavior.
This sentence from your above post sort of sums up what I am saying:
“I got into a relationship with my ex because he was the trouble-maker and I wanted to help him. I thought he needed me, so I stayed. That was my problem. I felt that I needed to help everyone.”
When we try to “help” or “rescue” someone else we end up allowing them to abuse us. We have to learn to set boundaries and expect others to either treat us nice or get the hell out of our lives. Not always an easy thing to learn. One step at a time is the best we can do. Get the dysfunctional abusing people out of our lives and start over.
Hey you bunch of boobs! lol
I’m still here, just tired.
Miss all of you. i’ve been doing a lot of nothing,
working, ugh. 🙂
Hey, Super Chic! How are you doing? The weather finally broke here about Labor Day and we got less heat, but today was the first drop of rain we have seen in WEEKS and WEEKS. As I drove to town today even with a BURN BAN on, some fool was burning big brush piles and that was BEFORE the rain came.
Doggie has tick-borne fever, so I went to town to take him to the vet, and I caught it early! At least I haven’t gotten it this summer, so I am counting my blessings. When I saw the burning I called 911 to report it and I hope they got a BIG FINE! That was my favorite part of being on the fire department was writing tickets to IDIJUTS that burned things when we had a burn ban on because of the danger of fire. Texas is burning to the ground and our state is dry as a bone so could go any time!
No cure for stupidity!
Hi Oxy! I’m hanging in there! Glad to hear you got some rain,
I’ve seen the weather reports and coverage on the fires…
you’ve had a tough summer. I am SO glad you reported the idiot burning the brush!! Really!
No cure for stupidity! I love that!
Hope the doggie is feeling better. Ticks freak me out,
never had one on me… yet
Hey CHIC….it’s been awhile girl!
Good to see you…..and good to see you’re staying out of trouble!!!
XXOO
EB
EB, it’s good to see you too!
I’m staying out of trouble because I’ve sort of been in a
zombie zone, don’t know what it is, maybe just not used to
working! lol
My brain is fried, and I’m not on drugs 😀
Chic…..are you keeping your head up and looking at the BRIGHT SIDE? You’re working…….that’s a REAL GOOD THING!!!!
Maybe try some drugs…..I hear they help the brain fry……OH WAIT……that’s vitamins…..oooops sorry got it backwards! 🙂
I trust your taking care of yourself……really…..doing some good things for yourself these days!!!!
Don’t make me come hunt your ass down girl! 🙂
Hi Superchic!
When you post lately I can’t tell how you really are, and I sure would like to know.
I am glad you are working. How is the job?