True Lovefraud Stories, on Lovefraud.com, is a series of case studies illustrating how con artists and people who would probably be diagnosed as sociopaths ply their trade. Months, and sometimes years, have passed since these individuals were profiled. But according to updates we’ve heard, they’re still pulling their scams.
If you are still trying to believe that the predator you were involved with will see the light and change his or her behavior, read these stories. You’ll see that it’s not going to happen. Once a sociopath becomes an adult, he or she does not change.
Dennis SanSeverino
Since February, Trish Rynn, who lost her home and inheritance to Dennis SanSeverino, has been trying to hold him accountable. Back in 2006, SanSeverino pled guilty to theft by illegal retention, and was sentenced to five years probation. He was ordered to pay Rynn restitution of $275,000.
Well, he hasn’t been doing it, and Rynn has been trying to get SanSeverino prosecuted for violating his probation. The prosecutor’s office in Cape May County, New Jersey, wasn’t exactly interested in pursuing the case, but Rynn was persistent, and Judge Raymond Batten finally found him guilty of violating his probation. SanSeverino’s sentencing hearing was scheduled for September 26, 2008. He never showed up.
That day, SanSeverino’s latest girlfriend called the court and said SanSeverino was in the hospital. The judge didn’t buy it and issued a warrant for his arrest. But the con artist has apparently left the state, and authorities don’t seem to consider this case worth the time and expense of extradition.
Brian Ellington
Lovefraud has been hearing from all kinds of people about Brian Ellington. Apparently he’s been making the rounds of North Carolina golf courses, pretending to be a pro and betting $1,000 a hole. When he wins, he makes out. When he loses, he doesn’t pay. He also runs up bar tabs and leaves, forcing whoever had the misfortune of being the evening’s drinking buddy to foot the bill.
Then we got phone calls from someone with official connections saying that Elllington had been arrested in New York. He had a court appearance for a petit larceny charge scheduled for September 22, 2008, in the Bronx, but did not show up. A warrant was issued for his arrest. Ellington was also supposed to be in Manhattan court in August for a disorderly conduct charge, and we doubt showed up for that one either.
Phil Haberman
Lovefraud has written extensively about Phil Haberman, first profiled by the Dallas Observer as “G.I. Jerk.” Haberman married a woman before shipping off to Iraq so he could collect separation benefits from the military. When he got to Iraq he claimed special forces training, diving skills, medic training—yeah, right. The army shipped him back after 24 days.
Eventually, he received an Other Than Honorable discharge—his second one. Since then, however, he repeatedly tried to enlist in National Guard units that are shipping out to Iraq. His most recent attempt was last week in North Fort Hood, Texas—the largest active duty armored post in the United States. Commanders became suspicious of Haberman’s stories, and the man they asked to check Haberman out was already intimately familiar with the con artist’s scams. According to posts on ProfessionalSoldiers.com, Haberman was “shown the front gate of North Fort Hood and told to never come back.”
So what did Haberman do? He went to the Dallas JAG office and filed a complaint against the commander for kicking him out.
By the way, Haberman posted a video of himself during parachute training on YouTube.
Lance Larabee
Lance Larabee, who has conned women into buying him houses, boats and planes, has declared bankruptcy in an effort to avoid paying the judgments against him won by one of his victims, Debbie White. When White contested the bankruptcy, Larabee filed a claim against her for invasion of privacy. Apparently Larabee didn’t like what was written about him in Lovefraud and other places. Hearings are coming soon.
James Montgomery
I was contacted recently by a woman in Australia—my ex-husband, James Montgomery, is on About My Age in Australia, “The online community for over 50s.” Montgomery claims to be a “retired academic and screenwriter.” Yeah, right. This woman got suspicious about his Ph.D., Googled him, found Lovefraud and dumped him.
I checked out my ex-husband’s listing on AboutMyAge.com. He’s posted a photo that was taken in 1997, when he was married to me and was a guest on a local radio station, which is reproduced below.
When I first met Montgomery he lied to me about his age, claiming he was “a genuine baby boomer”—49 years old—when he was really 55. I wonder what he’s claiming now. Here is a current photo, taken in March, 2008. It is not posted on AboutMyAge.com.
And they escalate. Thanks for the story “update”
here’s another sad, sad story
http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/lifestyle/health/chi-violence-series-web-oct13,0,3978483.story
ps
That woman must have just about passed out when she found this site.
I had a realization today. I have been so angry lately and fantasizing about the serious pain I want to put the other women into. Then, my mind switched today. And I said to myself “I have been seriously hurt!” I was first so obsessed with him and what disorder he might have. He’s a malignant blah with antisocial blah. Then I turned to the other women and wishing HUGE pain on her. Today for the first time I saw the hurt I am in. I saw it! It’s my turn. It’s my turn to be obssessed with my healing. It’s been six or seven months. I think I am ready for me now.
I was really hurt! and it really feels good to say it and to finally realize it.
Dear dear dear, Bird!
I am so soooooooo glad that you are going to focus on you and Birdie now and not give the anger any more time to etch itself into your heart.
Anger after what you have been through is so NATURAL, so expected, and I think probably most of us have felt that same horrible horrible anger, rage, wrath, wish for revenge….it is just part of what hits us when we have been so INJURED.
But moving past those natural feelings, and to let go of the negative and search for the positive, the positive in ourselves, the good in ourselves, to see the blessings we have and the strength and stamina we have, and what wonderful, caring and loving people we are. That we are WORTHY and GOOD. To focus on doing and caring for ourselves, rather than focus on the Ps and what they did.
You know, I think it is important at first for us to name, to describe and to go into DETAIL about every nasty thing they did to us, but I think that gives us validation that they are EVIL, just plain and simple EVIL. But, then we have to move on to let go of that pain and focus on the GOOD in ourselves, to find what about ourselves, our good selves, that let them use and abuse us, then to “plug the leaks” in ourselves, and start enjoying being P-FREE.
Now, the “details” of he did this, she said that, he did that, etc. are no longer important to me, I am VALIDATED already, so now, what I am focusing on is to take each day—not yesterday, not tomorrow, but TO-DAY, and make it a GOOD day. To enjoy the things I see, the things I feel, the simple and wonderful things that God has provided for me to enjoy TODAY.
Not to feel hatred toward them, or anger toward them, just not feel anything for them (indifference) but to feel LOVE for myself and love for those that love me. Just let go of the anger and malice, and leave them to God to deal with.
I can’t change the past, and where is the “future”? Is always one day away, but I HAVE TODAY TO ENJOY, an I want to make each day wonderful.
The past couple of weeks I have been watching some wild flowers that are blooming outside my bedroom window and each day I notice someting different about them and their subtle violet color against the background of the brown ground and leaves falling. A simple thing, but something that gives me such JOY. It had been so long since I had felt joy, all I could feel was the pain.
If you smash your toe, and are in intense pain, it is difficult for you to appreciate a rose, no matter how beautiful it is. If you are angry at anything, it is difficult for you to appreciate anything no matter how wonderful.
Bird, you have the most wonderful thing in the world to watch BLOOM right before your very eyes, you have the Birdie to watch grow and bloom. And sure, it is hard being a single parent and working and nurturing a child alone, but yet at the same time, the joy of a child’s smile, the joy of watching them learn new things each day and how they can watch a shadow cross the room and take immense pleasure in seeing it change.
I am doing my best to look at the world with the FRESH eyes of a child. To take JOY where before there was only anger, loss and pain. I’m glad you are on the road my love, here, take my hand, take the hand of everyone here on Lovefraud that thinks so much of you and your lovely spirit and cares so much for you and Birdie….let’s make that journey to JOY together! I’m sitting here as I type with tears of JOY streaming down my face for you! That’s the only kind of tears I want to cry now, tears of JOY and HAPPINESS (I’m a sentimental slob even if I do have an iron skillet to boink with! ) ((((hugs)))) and a cheek pinch and squeeze and big hug for Birdie! Love Oxy
I don’t know what I would have done without you oxy. If I don’t write it enough, I want you to know that I thank god for you daily.
Bird we are at the same time of NC six or seven months – who knows how long – in another thread I was saying for the first time I have had moment’s when I realized he was no where in my mind – just a moment here and there – and you are so right about staying focused on what they did and what they are. It is time that helps us – Time time for us Bird
Henry, I and so proud of you too, I hope you know that. I know I have bashed you until the top of your head must be flat by now, but belive me when Isay I have also got a flat head as well from bashing myself when I got too negative.! (((hugs)))) Bro!
“here’s another sad, sad story”
One thing about any type of abuse…
Is that in the end it touches us all……
Huge step Bridie and it will serve you well to focus on your own healing, your own pain, the you that needs care and nurturing. You go girl! Actually recognizing our pain is the beginning of getting through it I believe.
About how the P’s just don’t quit.
I was recently telling a friend (also a victim of my P to the tune of several hundred thousand $$) about how my ex is pushing to not only get EVERYTHING (after raping the company I own and hiding funds god knows where) – not only does he want all of the little that is left, he wants to force me to assume $$ions of debt that I had no part in creating or any awareness of until years after the fact.
We don’t understand how he could have that kind of hubris. My only answer is unmitigated greed and a need to destroy his enmies, which now includes me.
My only analogy is the story of how some African monkeys are trapped. A clay vase with a narrow neck is staked to the ground with a piece of rope. A few peanuts go in the bottom. The monkey will insert his hand to get the peantuts, and then not be able to remove his now swollen fist. Rather than let go of the prize, he will stay hungry and thirsty and be captured, before letting go.
In the case of the poor monkey it is just a slightly maladapted survival instinct.
With the P’s it is their arraogance and sense of entitlement, they have moved and scored in the shadows of their lies for so long, that they think their real self is invisible, and invincible.
Because most of us cannot fathom the depth of their greed and malice, they skate, with a little false charm and humility, through life, taking as they please.
At present I am still holding back, in terms of retaliating with legal issues that would make his life very uncomfortable – to say the least. I am holding back because of the hell I know would be unleashed on me and likely my kids if I act to really defend myself.
Nevertheless, just the fact that I won’t let him take it all RIGHT NOW has him twisitng with frustration, using family and friends and the legal system for ambient abuse wherever he can. Who knows what he will do if I take the gloves off.
So, no, they only quit when they are jailed or die, best I can tell. But by all accounts they usually end up in a downward spiral of failure and isolation.
I do hope one day through research and education we can find a remedy for this wasteful, hurtful,dangerous condition in other human beings. Many of them would have so very much to offer, were they not so bent and twisted in their false life with their false self.
Meanwhile, like Birdy and Oxy and James et al, we can focus on healing and recovering our joy.
speaking of which, check out
brightnightgallery.com
for some extraordinary shots of our milky way and so on. Magical.
Peace and love
We have reason to believe that Barry Lichtenthal is also up to his old tricks. If you have been victimized by Lichtenthal we invite you to contact us.