The two most recent Letters to Lovefraud both had the same theme: Sociopathic men who relentlessly pursued women, proclaiming their love, making glowing promises of a committed relationship. The men pushed for sex, and although the women resisted, eventually, believing they were involved in real romances, the women succumbed to the men’s physical desires. With that, both women were dumped.
Read the letters here:
I met him on Facebook, was used for sex and dumped the next day
I felt bonded, even though this made me nauseated
Both women were astounded at how they were unceremoniously booted. They had a hard time coming to grips with the idea that they’d been used and abused. How could a man say all those wonderful things and not mean them? How could a man who talked so eloquently about love be lying? How could a man paint such a beautiful picture of the future and then discard me? Was there something wrong with me? Wasn’t I sexy enough? Smart enough? Pretty enough?
Both women tried to get answers from the men. The men, however, never admitted the true reason that they did what they did:
They wanted to.
Core of a sociopath
Sometimes it’s hard for us to get our minds around how truly different sociopathic individuals are from the rest of us. This is understandable. After all, 96% to 99% of people are like us—capable of love and consideration.
But that 1% to 4% who are sociopaths—well, they might as well be aliens. These people:
- Feel no empathy at all towards other human beings
- Have no conscience
- Are interested only power, control and sex
This is the core of a sociopath—no empathy, no conscience and desiring only power, control and sex.
Implications
So what does this mean? It means sociopaths feel entitled to take what they want, regardless of how their actions may damage others. It means they get no satisfaction from connectedness with others, they only get satisfaction from winning. It means sociopaths view the world as predators and prey—they are the predators and everyone else is prey.
This is shocking. Mind-blowing. Impossible to understand.
So we cannot try to understand. We can only accept. This is how they are.
They do not want us as lovers, partners, friends or family members. They want power, control and sex.
learning-thanks so much. I do try to do the half your body weight in water a day but it’s hard cuz I need to lose 90lbs. I am trying to get back in that police academy. I am mentally prepared but not physically. I am trying to get used to doing PT outside in the heat cuz it’s not here in NOLA in summer. I had to withdraw from class last summer due to the ex spath but a lot of people were falling out due to the heat. It was super intense and I want to be ready for it.
erin72 – when you say ‘do’ half your body weight in water per day..do you mean drink half your body weight???
now i am going to run to the kitchen and get my food scale out…
one_step: yes that’s what I was talking about. I hear from a lot of trainers that it is a good thing. It’s just hard for me to accomplish cuz I end up in the bathroom all the time, which interferes with my job.
if i drink half my body wieght – which i guess (;)) is 170 lbs, then i have to drink 65 lbs of water.
20 oz per lb. MEANS 1300 OZS or 81 2 cup servings.
umm, this isn’t possible.
and sounds a bit dangerous in terms of electrolyte balance and a strain on kidneys. ESPECIALLY if you are drinking a lot fast.
water is important for detox and hydration, but no way that amount of water is useful…don’t even know how your kidneys could keep up….5 2 cup servings per hour if you are awake 16 hours…2 cups every 12 minutes….
where’d these guys get their creds?
i wanna pee just thinking about it….
thing si know about hydration – slow sips will make it into the cells, big gulps flush kidneys. pure coconut water, no sugar is outrageously hydrating. i drank it all the time when i was living in the Caribbean; it kept me hydrated in extreme heat. my whole body sighs when i drink it.
erin72 – and congrats on working toward your goal!
one-step-I told you the wrong thing and I didn’t realize it til I read your post. I meant to say to drink half your body weight in OUNCES of water-not pounds. I’m sorry. So if you weigh 170 then I guess it would be 85 ounces of water. That’s not unsafe. Sorry I screwed up! :):)
one_step-is that true about the coconut water and can you drink it at room temperature? I could drink it in the police academy?
well, thank the lord! i was concerned for you.
yes, very true about the coocnut water, and you can drink it at room temp. but it needs to be stored in refrig. make sure you get pure coconut water. if you live in a bigger city you can find it in a caribbean store (cheaper) or in tetra packs in health food stores.
it’s not cheap, but it is wonderful.
one_step-thanks. Can I keep it in a cooler with my lunch then?