Before sunrise on September 11, 2001, my rowing partner, Mary, and I, were already on the water for our morning workout. As darkness imperceptibly gave way to light, the bay was calm, the air was clear—an absolutely beautiful day dawned. We glided past herons and egrets, enjoying the quiet peace of Nature.
A couple of hours later, I was driving to a 10 a.m. meeting when I heard something on the car radio about a small plane crashing into the World Trade Center in New York City. By the time I reached my client’s office, all of her co-workers were standing around a radio. Both towers of the World Trade Center were hit, and the announcers were talking about a terrorist attack.
“What do you want to do?” I asked my client. Neither one of us knew the office protocol for terrorist attacks.
“I guess we’ll have the meeting,” she said.
So we did. But from the expansive plate glass windows in her conference room, I had a clear view of the flight paths into Atlantic City International Airport, which was about eight miles away, right in the middle of the busy Northeast corridor. Jet after jet was landing. None were taking off.
I rushed home after the meeting and turned on the television, shocked at the images that played over and over on the screen. A huge jet, loaded with fuel, crashing into the tallest building in New York. One tower fell, then the other. It was horrifying.
Was my family safe? One brother had an office in Lower Manhattan. My other brother was managing a construction project at Newark International Airport. My sister had flown to Hawaii a few days earlier. Gradually, when cell phone calls finally went through, I learned that my family was okay.
Thousands of other people weren’t so lucky.
Thousands of other people, through no fault of their own, had their lives ripped apart. People on their way to important destinations, people starting their day at work, were suddenly gone. The people who loved them were left to ask why.
Why did this happen? What had they done wrong? What did I do wrong? How am I going to survive?
They clung to hope, and then there was none.
I knew what that felt like.
A year earlier, I was forced to give up hope. I had been pursuing my $1.25 million judgment against my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery. I was convinced I would find the money, and it would right my life that had been so wronged.
Before meeting my ex, I had been going to work every day, having fun when I could, and hoping, along the way, to make a romantic connection. James Montgomery presented himself as the love of my life. In truth, he was a terrorist who intentionally crashed into everything I had built, and brought it down.
I was outraged. I was an upstanding, responsible human being. I had done many things right and nothing wrong, yet my life was ripped to shreds.
I sought justice. The court said I was right, and the judge in my divorce awarded me everything that was taken from me—$227,000—plus $1 million in punitive damages. I pursued the money until 2000, when I had no choice but to admit failure. I was not going to recover what I had lost.
I collapsed. I raged. I demanded answers from God. What had I done to deserve this?
On September 11, 2001, and in the following traumatic days, I couldn’t breathe. I viscerally felt the nation’s collective horror. I knew the outrage, the confusion, the fear, the hope and then the hopelessness. I felt like I was reliving how my own life had crashed, magnified by a hundred, or perhaps a thousand.
A couple of weeks after the devastating tragedy, I wrote a poem. It was all I could do.
One Day In September
By Donna Andersen
Tuesday the eleventh dawns like any other day
Sunlight breaks the grayness as we row upon the bay
Herons, gulls and egrets barely glance as we glide by
They’re the creatures, at this hour, that rule the brightening sky
These mornings are a treasure, Mary and I agree
Ten o’clock my meeting is all scheduled to begin
Everyone is staring at a radio as I walk in
The peak of New York City has exploded into fire
Thick, black smoke is billowing from our economic spire
Do we work? Do we stop? Are they getting out?
Message light is blinking where are you? Are you there?
Are your brothers in New York today? Is your sister in the air?
Cell phones are not working have you seen the awful news?
What on earth is happening? Has anyone a clue?
Yes, the TV’s on, but I can’t absorb the scene
News uninterrupted, it’s bad and getting worse
Crash into the towers the idea is so perverse
Ten thousand in each edifice had just begun their day
Now a pile of rubble and all I can do is pray
Let there be survivors, please; God, we need you now
Jet slams into shining glass
The hundredth time today
Another angle, another shot
Let’s review that play
But this is not a game
Fires burning, twisted steel, it’s such an wrenching sight
Sweetheart, please come over, I can’t be alone tonight
Earlier this morning it was birds that ruled the sky
Now it’s raining jet fuel why did they have to die?
All those lonely pillows in so many empty beds
Family and friends are safe, but I can’t catch my breath
Two degrees of separation keep me from knowing death
Mary’s childhood classmate was one who called his wife
From up above the fire, hoping vainly for his life
Never did I know him, yet still I feel the loss
Countless private tragedies just add to my distress
How can I stop crying, ease the tension in my chest?
My brothers at ground zero passed buckets hand to hand
The president promises that America will take a stand
I am just a writer, searching desperately for words
Holes punched in our confidence, life forever changed
But this I know from experience: Good can come from pain
Our hearts have been ripped open, yet open hearts can feel
Compassion for each other may be the gift of this ordeal
Pray it is a turning point in our human history
Search for justice underway
Portends a mourning dove
In the end, there’s love and fear
And fear is lack of love
Our caring may be our hope
I may be going to be “flamed” here for this opinion, but I do not think the men who planned or executed the 9/11 attack were necessarily psychopaths, but put out that they may have been Zealots, but not necessary psychopaths.
Not every soldier or spy for a cause they believe in is a psychopath (though of course there are always some soldiers or spies who ARE psychopaths) but in the accomplishing of that they believe is a legitimate mission they know that the deaths of many people, some innocent non-combatants, will die, but they believe that the mission, the war, etc. is worth it.
Look at the pilots of the planes who dropped the bombs on Japan to end World War II. Are those men psychopaths? Their bombs resulted in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of mostly innocent victims. Does that mean they had to be psychopaths? I don’t think it does. Does that mean their bombs didn’t kill innocent victims? Of course not.
I think Zealots (Wiki definition: Zealot (from Greek ζηλωτής – zelotes, “emulator, zealous admirer or follower”) can be anyone who has been “brainwashed” or totally convinced that their “cause” is just and that they must fight for that cause in any way that is necessary for it to prevail.
There are zealots for many causes….the aniti-animal research zealots who go and break open research labs and release the animals, the anti-abortion zealots who go bomb abortion clinics, and so on. Soldiers who go to war against another nation and believe in their causes.
Here are a couple of examples of what I think are “extreme” examples of zealots where only one person was harmed, their child, but they SINCERELY believed they were doing right.There is a couple in prison right now, (I read about it last night) who were vegans and they fed their baby on soy milk and apple juice until he starved to death at age 6 weeks, and they are in prison now. Another couple have just been charged with killing their child by not allowing him to have medical treatment, but preferring “faith healing” when the child was born sick and weak.
These two sets of parents were unwise, misguided in my opinion, but they were SINCERELY following their belief systems to the best of their ability. Yet, our society says that even if the parent is sincere in their beliefs that if the beliefs are harmful to the child that the State has a right and a DUTY to preserve the life and health of the child.
Just like those parents who willingly gave their children to be the multiple wives of Tony Alamo and Jeffs at an age in which the child was not able to legally consent to such an arrangement. Those parents were SINCERE in what they did, they weren’t probably psychopaths, although I believe the damage they did to their children was massive.
I firmly believe from reading very good biographies of them that Hitler and Mao were psychopaths, and some of their leading henchmen were also psychopaths, but not every Nazi was a psychopath, and not every Communist Chinese was a psychopath, even though they may have followed the “party line” in the things that they did.
So not everyone, even those who do things that result in horrible damage to individuals, to groups, or even to countries, is a psychopath no matter how big the damage that is done.
I totally disagree with the rabid Muslim teachings that all kafirs (Wiki definition: Kafir (Arabic: كاÙر kÄfir; plural ÙƒÙّار kuffÄr) is an Arabic term used in a Islamic doctrinal sense, usually translated as “unbeliever” or “disbeliever”, or sometimes “infidel”. The term refers to a person who rejects God or who hides, denies, or “covers” the truth.) must die. I totally disagree that anyone who doesn’t believe as I do must be punished or die. But that does not mean I will or think our country should stand around when zealots of any kind attack individuals or our country as a whole.
I don’t doubt for one minute that some of the higher up zealots use this zealotry as an excuse for power and control of others to do their bidding, but at the same time, I think some of the “soldiers” in their armies are simply misguided, but sincere individuals who have been convinced that their violent acts are for the “greater good of the greater cause.”
The various inquisitions were religious zealotry at its finest and thousands of people were tortured or burned at the stake for their “hearsay” against the prevailing religions and I have no doubt that some of those who were burned were my ancestors and some others of my ancestors were the ones who lit the fires.
While “western” cultures have more or less grown out of this religious zealotism, other cultures are still mired in this “believe my way or die, infidel!” Changing those cultures mired in religious or social zealotism is a big job and I do not believe can be accomplished by force, but only through education and will take several generations (at best) of exposure to other ways of thinking.
In our own culture, women have had the vote for less than 100 years, slaves have only been free for a 150 years, so it takes time for cultures to change and internalize new ways of believing.
In the meantime, we must protect those children from parents wo are zealots and we must protect our cities and our country from religious or political zealots, we can’t just throw up our hands or throw flowers at them any more than we can against the psychopaths, but not every zealot is a psychopath either.
Thanks for the comments skylar,
Yes, the last part about why people refuse to accept the truth is the most intriguing. I have always wondered why my sister who is married to a psychopathy refuses to see the truth about him. I liked the part when someone told Richared Gage: “I would not believe what you were telling me even if it were true.”!
Amazing! Is not it? (see frame 1:53)
This is exactly what I felt my sister was telling me every time I told her a fact about her husband. I could not make sense of her denial until l read about psychopaths.
It took a psychopath to excute such a perfect lie with total disregards to the damages done to the lives and feelings of all those who were affected.
To Ox Drover,
Hi Ox Drover,
Good comment but did you watch the documentary?
I got the feeling that you did not watch the video because your comment did not address what is in this new documentary..
Freedomfare,
No I did not watch it, I have limited amount of Gigs on internet so can’t watch videos as it EATS up megabites….
My comment was not just about 9/11 attack, though, but about all zealot attacks and wars where it is “Us” against “them” which justifies taking actions (killing people) that soldiers must make, or even the sticking to your beliefs about veganism or medical care when your child dies as a result. Not ALL people who are zealots are psychopaths even if what they do as a result of their belief system results in someone else dying.
freedomfare,
I watched the video about the buildings collapsing, being the result of a controlled demolition (according to various building experts). Boy, I never imagined that there could be more to the story – that the buildings could have been deliberately destroyed, not coming down due to planes flying into them. After watching the video, I have many questions – who was responsible for placing the bombs and WHY? Anyone who created so much carnage is absolutely evil, no conscience whatsoever.
you know when freedomfare posted that vid i thought things might go sideways on the blog – we often get into trouble around certain topics. I gotta say, i a muy impressed with us all. 🙂
I watched the vid. I have always thought that the buildings fell very oddly – not like anything i had seen before. And i know there is AWLAYS more than the ‘official’ story to anything that affects a country as deeply as this did. I do suspect there were bombs in the building and that the planes were for effect. I have no idea who set them, nor do i care to conjecture.
What i do know is that it has changed so much of how countries interact with one another. that scapegoats have been created and will continue to be created in all possible ways. it has changed the focus of world governments (smoke screen for what???) and the everyday fears and experience of many.
it’s always about who benefits. follow the benefit and find the players.
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something very bad just happened in Canada. A fellow tried for half an hour to get someone to call the police as his friend had fallen in the river. people refused to call, refused to lend him their cell phone, etc. his friend was real, he died. i heard a short interview just now, with the woman who did call the police. my heart just broke. the man was a person without much means and unkempt. he was native. i can’t tell you how this feels. i am angry sad aghast. The people who refused to make a phone call should be charged as accessories in his friend’s death. this is disgusting. fucking racist classist shit.
when i can find a link i will post it. THIS IS THE LACK OF COMPASSION WE MUST GUARD OURSELVES AGAINST.
i am going to write his friend and his friend’s family when i can find some contact info. this is so awful.
found a link:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatchewan/story/2011/09/13/sk-regina-wascana-park-1108.html
Dear One/Joy,
I started to watch the link, thank you for posting it, but I couldn’t make myself watch it because I knew it would raise my blood pressure that people are this uncaring. Thanks for posting it for those of us who CAN watch it though.
I didn’t watch the documentary on the way the towers fell…I did think they fell sort of like those that are intentionally demolished (I love watching those intentionally demolished buildings come down) but at the same time, I also believe the planes COULD have very well brought them down without any other explosives being involved and I’m not going to go off on some tangent about conspiracy theories. I don’t have enough information or proof and no way to get any, to change my mind about how the buildings did come down.
So ALL I can say for sure is hijacked planes flew into them, and the buildings fell.
While the men who hijacked the planes have been identified as Zealot Muslim terrorists by out government, actually, I think that is probably true, but even being a zealot and willing to do some terrible things to our country doesn’t necessarily qualify them as psychopaths I don’t think. They are doing what they have been taught is RIGHT to people that they think DESERVE to die, so just as there can be psychopaths in the armed forces of any country, just being in the armed forces and willing to kill for your country and your cause, doesn’t necessarily make you a psychopath.
I agree re your last sentence oxy. I put this in the box with your stance on capital punishment. although we do have different opinions on that one, yours is more considered than mine.
i am still a bit in shock about the man who tried to get help for his friend. not shocked at the racism or the classism, but at the horror of it and the effect of the classism and racism on these two men, and other native folks. i know that i would be the person making the phone call. i don’t doubt that. but i also know i would be the person punching the noses of those who didn’t. i hope they feel like shit.
tomorrow i go for my intake appt at the abuse and trauma centre that grew out of our local sexual assault centre.
today i went for another infrared sauna, and yesterday was neurofeedback – and for 2 of these appts., i left work. taking care of my health. i have to get over this last mold exposure – coupled with the other body break down stuff this summer, i am flaming fatigued. i need my energy back. so i am working for it.