Nearly all of the research into sociopathy has involved evaluating the personality traits of adult men in prison. The reason for this is that researchers have easy access to adult prisoners and more prisoners are male. Think about it—how else would a researcher find sociopaths to study? The problem with studying sociopathy in male prisoners is that we learn nothing about sociopaths who never get arrested. We also don’t know if the research results apply to women.
There is actually very little research data available regarding sociopathy in non-criminals and in women. The little research that has been done reveals that sociopathy in women entails two or three main features that are similar to those found in men. Namely, female sociopaths lack empathy and enjoy manipulating and exploiting others. Violent and impulsive behavior is less common in sociopathic women. This fact may make them more dangerous, as they more easily blend in with the rest of society.
The key traits of sociopathic females
A recent study of adolescent girls in detention performed by Crystal L. Schrum, M.A. and Randall T. Salekin, Ph.D. of the University of Alabama and reported in Behavioral Sciences and the Law, revealed the core qualities that best described young female sociopaths. The teens were callous and lacked empathy, had a grandiose sense of self worth and were conning and manipulative. They were also likely to engage in impersonal sexual relationships. Importantly, the researchers revealed that female sociopaths did not necessarily have “shallow emotions.” Again the lack of impulsivity and shallow emotions may make a female sociopath more difficult to spot.
Please read the true Lovefraud story of Michelle Drake. Notice that female sociopaths victimize other women as well as men. This vignette illustrates many of the core qualities of a female sociopath. As I read this case, I was painfully reminded of the male sociopath who was once part of my life; so perhaps the similarities between male and female sociopaths are more important than the differences. What struck me about the story is the elaborate con she perpetrated for really very little money. This case illustrates something truly amazing about sociopaths—the degree to which they derive pleasure from conning others. Their hoaxes are often outlandish and grandiose.
A friend of mine, who was once in law enforcement, says that conning is the sociopath’s profession and that that he/she may not even do it for the money. Conning is instead the work they have a passion for. As my friend says, “When a sociopath wakes up and opens his eyes in the morning, it’s show time!” I can envision Michelle saying that to herself as she donned the fake pregnancy costume.
The public and the courts are sympathetic toward female sociopaths
The case of Michelle Drake also illustrates something else about female sociopaths. The courts are more likely to go easy on them. This attitude of the courts may reflect the fact that many people excuse the behavior of female sociopaths and feel sorry for them. Look at the cases of women in the news lately. We don’t know if the women involved are sociopaths, however, these cases do illustrate the double standard that exists in how we judge female as opposed to male antisocial behavior. Several women teachers have been found guilty of sexually exploiting students. They were treated very leniently for the same crimes that would have put a man in jail for many years.
The NASA astronaut arrested for attempted murder is another example of the way people treat women differently and don’t take their crimes seriously. This week, a restaurant owner in Florida held a benefit night to raise money for the astronaut’s family. News commentators have been quick to voice sympathy for the astronaut, yet I have not heard a one express sympathy for the victim. I remind you that it is alleged that the astronaut sprayed her victim with mace and planned to kill her.
In conclusion, sociopathy is less common in women. Women who are sociopaths may not appear as shallow as men who are sociopaths. They are also less angry and impulsive compared to men. Although violence is less commonly perpetrated by women, if you are the victim, these statistics don’t matter.
WOW How did you know I have Venus in Leo? in fact, all my planets are in Leo and virgo. Not a good sign…
I will read your post now and comment after I’ve rested.
5 planets in Leo is pathetic..
I was just reading Donna’s “profile” section about sociopaths boasting about all their knowledge: philosophy, psychology..etc. but it’s superficial knowledge they have.
Also: I turned to those subjects because I had to intellectually understand WHY, but of course there was NO rhyme or reason….
I promise to write more about your great post later.
frontporchtalker
FPT, Your profile of the perfect victim fits me to a “T”.
We were walking around with a big bullseye on our foreheads!
I was involved with a narcissist for 14 years who was funny,
a real hoot, and at the time I thought he was
a real blast to be around, now I realize everything we did
was for him + he had a lot of family, I miss them.
Anyway, the red flags, easy to ignore then, not so easy now.
Especially easy to ignore when your mom was not there to
teach you, in fact you probably learned that bad behavior
was something you had to live with.
I love Adirondak chairs, wish we were all on a big porch
talking together, sipping our tea! That would be so cool.
Hello, this is the first time I have posted on here although I have spent a lot of time just looking. I guess it’s the topic that attracted me as I was married to two seperate psychopaths. Slow learner.
Anyway, the problem I have had for years is the stigma of being the victim. The police attitude, at least from males, is “Can’t you control your woman?” I am not joking, I have had that said to me. Female officers sem to have a lot more empathy, but that is probably due to being women and knowing what it feels like.
It has been my experience that the police will use every trick in the book to get out of dealing with something like this. I know of one case where the husband kept a log book and pictures etc. of what his “dearly beloved” was doing. The police tried to accuse the husband with being a stalker. If it weren’t for a very good lawyer the poor guy would have ended up in jail.
The other issue I have is that there are many safe homes for women and their children and Lord knows we need them. Try to look up a safe home for men. Not a chance. After having a knife stuck in your back while your asleep makes a safe home look like a great idea.
Anyway, as you can see I am quite angry about the whole mess and I do not want to “dump” on people here. Thanks for reading and allowing me a chance to vent.
BTW People may wonder how to get rid of stalking nut bars. Real easy and I’m serious. Tell them you just figured out your gay. Women are appalled they are losing their “man” to another man. Unfortunately that doesn’t work for women with a male psychopath. The male would want to watch you have sex with another woman.
perfect, but make that either sweet tea or espresso (double) for me!
I’ll respond more later.
who loves Adirondak chairs—I do, I do!
In one of the “scientific” articles it discusses the odd language that sociopaths use. They say “conscious” when they mean “conscientious,” etc.
They have a superficial understanding of many things, but no understanding beyond what they’ve heard on Dr. Phil, or on Oprah.
Hi FPT:) Thanks for sharing your story. I know how stressful it can be to try and unravel things enough to explain!
with regards to acronyms, I think these are the most common:
N = Narcissist
P = Psychopath
SP = Sociopath
DIL = Daughter-in-Law
ED = ‘Egg Doner’ ( a toxic mother)
🙂
(Les Misérables – sorry! I couldn’t resist! I am sleep deprived!;)x
Uncle Peter – I am sorry you have to be here. I hope it will help though.x
Les Mis- the BEST!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuffHRacZMQ
Lets see what the morrow brings us all!
Vive la liberte from disorder!
Dear Talker,
Well, I thought ErinB and I were the BIGGEST smart mouths on the blog, but I think you might be gonna run us a race! Glad you are here, and glad you feel comfortable in this company!
I’ve never been in any al-anon or AA meethings except as a professional visitor in in-patient settings, but I have sure met some psychopaths that used “recovery” as a COVER for their abuse of others. They seem to use the “recovery” llike others use “church” where everyone has to “forgive” you when you “sin.” Where is the PUKE emoticon when you need one.
I’m sure you’ve heard the term “dry drunk”—my egg donor’s brother, I call him Uncle MONSTER, was a really miserable and violent drunk and the strain goes back to the early 1800s and who knows how much before THAT! The women all being enablers, the men abusers.
Anyway, glad you are here, but sorry you have a “need to be” or is it a “right to be?” Anyway, again, Welcome!
Dear Uncle Peter,
Welcome to LF and glad you found us. This is an equal opportunity place to heal. I agree with you about the “safe house” bit too, and the stuff I am hearing now is that even women, if they don’t have children, are having hard times getting into shelters now because of the economy. Also with the economy what it is, finding a job before your “alloted time” runs out is another hurdle.
I have a son, who is in prison,, but he has stalked me from there (sending his friends) and I am learning about how to “hide in plain sight”—I bought some information a couple of years ago from a private investigator, and in the meantime hid out in an RV until the Trojan HOrse Psychopath my P-son had sent went to prison for trying to kill one of my other sons.
I’ve also been working on learning the ropes of how to NOT leave a paper or internet trail to where ever I have to go to the next time I have to run. I’m no longer living in TERROR but do live VERY cautiously.
I’m also finding out that I’ve done a LOT of things wrong, and that there is a TREMENDOUS amount of information easily and freely and no cost available on the internet about me, who I am associated with, and ya da ya da. I Can’t undo that information spill any more than BP can suck up all the oil out there, but hopefully I can CAP IT so that no more stuff gets out there.
One of the things I did find was that hiding in PLAIN SIGHT is easier than I thought, as you are not hiding from the FBI but just from nosey neighbors, so hide where there are others coming and going on a regular basis so you don’t incite curiosity by your very presence. I bought an RV and parked it next to a lake on a friend’s land. NO utilities in my name, scabbed on to his. My son didn’t know this man so would have no way to connnect my name to him.
Also, there are 100 other things you can do to protect your NAME being associated with your actual LOCATION. There are some good books out there, good internet sites and some not so good. I just finished a couple recently and wijll be doing a book review on them before long.
BE PREPARED if you are being stalked is the best advice I can give anyone. Have a “grab and go” bag with cash, papers, etc. or whatever you might need if you have to leave and NOT come back for (how long?)
Anyway, sorry you have to feel at home here Peter, but since you do “qualify” for our club, it’s a good one! Hang around. God bless.