CRON: Array ( [1552870215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552870515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552870815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552871115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552871415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552871715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552872015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552872315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552872615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552872915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552873215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552873515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552873815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552874115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552874415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552874715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552875015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552875315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552875615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552875915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552876215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552876515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552876815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552877115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552877415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552877715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552878015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552878315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552878615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552878915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552879215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552879515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552879815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552880115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552880415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552880715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552881015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552881315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552881615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552881915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552882215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552882515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552882815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552883115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552883415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552883715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552884015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552884315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552884615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552884915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552885200] => Array ( [woocommerce_scheduled_sales] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552885215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552885515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552885815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552886115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552886415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552886715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552887015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552887200] => Array ( [reschedule_event_post] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552887315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552887615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552887915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552888215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552888515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552888815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552889115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552889415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552889715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552890015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552890315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552890615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552890915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552891215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552891515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552891728] => Array ( [check_plugin_updates-easy-social-share-buttons3] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552891815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552892115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552892145] => Array ( [bestwebsoft_wp_update_plugins] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552892294] => Array ( [check_plugin_updates-ad-inserter-pro] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552892415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552892715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552893015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552893315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552893615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552893915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552894215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552894515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552894815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552895115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552895200] => Array ( [reschedule_event_post] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552895415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552895715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552896015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552896486] => Array ( [check_plugin_updates-easy-social-share-buttons] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552896615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552897215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552897515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552897815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552898102] => Array ( [wp_1_wc_privacy_cleanup_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => wp_1_wc_privacy_cleanup_cron_interval [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 300 ) ) ) [1552898115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552898415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552898715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552899015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552899315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552899318] => Array ( [ao_cachechecker] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552899615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552899915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552900215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552900515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552900815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552901336] => Array ( [wpbdp_daily_events] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552901415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552901861] => Array ( [_cron_zencache_cleanup] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552902015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552902315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552902615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552902915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552903215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552903515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552903815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552903969] => Array ( [update_network_counts] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552904115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552904415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552904715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552905015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552905315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552905611] => Array ( [woocommerce_cleanup_sessions] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => twicedaily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 43200 ) ) ) [1552905615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552905915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552906215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552906515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552906815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552907115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552907415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552907715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552908015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552908315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552908615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552908915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552909035] => Array ( [seopressor_site_audit] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) [seopressor_daily_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552909215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552909515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552909649] => Array ( [check_plugin_updates-event-espresso-core-reg] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552909815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552910115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552910415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552910715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552911015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552911315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552911437] => Array ( [simple_history/maybe_purge_db] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552911615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552911915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552912215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552912515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552912815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552913115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552913715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552914015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552914301] => Array ( [wp_cache_gc] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => [args] => Array ( ) ) ) ) [1552914315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552914615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552914915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552915215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552915815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552916415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552916715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552917015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552917315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552917615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552917915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552918215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552918815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552919415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552919715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552920015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552920315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552920615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552920915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552921215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552921515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552921621] => Array ( [yotuwp_cache_event] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552921815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552922115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552922415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552922715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552923315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552923615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552923915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552924215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552924515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552924815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552925115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552925415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552925715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552926015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552926315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552926316] => Array ( [action_scheduler_run_queue] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => every_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552926615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552926915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552927211] => Array ( [woocommerce_cleanup_personal_data] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552927215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552927221] => Array ( [woocommerce_tracker_send_event] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552927515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552927815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552928115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552928415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552928715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552929015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552929315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552929615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552929915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552930815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552931115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552931175] => Array ( [delete_expired_transients] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552931415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552931715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552932015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552932315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552932615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552932915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552933215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552933515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552933815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552933929] => Array ( [wpbdp_license_check] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552934115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552934415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552934715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552935015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552935315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552935615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552935915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552935964] => Array ( [subscribe_reloaded_purge] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552936215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552936815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552937415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552938011] => Array ( [woocommerce_cleanup_logs] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552938333] => Array ( [wp_scheduled_delete] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552938915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552939515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552939815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552940115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552940715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552941615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552941915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552943715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552944015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552944315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552944615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552944915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552945215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552945515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552945815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552946115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552946415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552946715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552947015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552947315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552947615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552947915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552948215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552948515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552948815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552949115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552949415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552949715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552950015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552950315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552950428] => Array ( [wp_scheduled_auto_draft_delete] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552950915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552951215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552951515] => Array ( [seopressor_link_check] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552951575] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552951815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552952115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552952415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552952715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552953015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552953315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552953615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552953900] => Array ( [yst_ga_aggregate_data] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) [monsterinsights_daily_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => daily [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 86400 ) ) ) [1552953915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552954215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552954515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552954815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552955115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552955415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552956015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552956315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552956615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552956915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552957215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552957515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552957815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552958115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552958415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552958715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552959015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552959315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552959615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552959915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552960515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552960815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552961115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552961415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552961715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552962015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552962315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552962615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552962915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552963215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552963515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552963815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552964115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552964415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552964715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552965015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552965315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552965615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552965915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552966215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552966515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552966815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552967115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552967415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552967715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552968015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552968315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552968615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552968915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552969215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552969515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552969815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552970115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552970150] => Array ( [wpbdp_listings_expiration_check] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => hourly [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 3600 ) ) ) [1552970415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552970715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552971015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552971315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552971544] => Array ( [wppa_cleanup] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => hourly [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 3600 ) ) ) [1552971615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552972215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552972515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552972815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552973115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552973415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552973715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552974015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552974315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552974615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552974915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552975215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552975515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552975815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552976115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552976415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552976715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552977015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552977315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552977615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552977915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552978215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552978515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552978815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552979115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552979415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552979715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552980015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552980315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552980615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552980915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552981215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552981515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552982415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552982715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552983015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552983615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552984215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552988715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552991415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552991715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552992015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552992615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552993215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552993515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552994115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552994415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552995015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552995315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552995915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552996215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552996515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552996815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552997115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552997415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552997715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552998015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552998615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552998915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552999215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1552999515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553000115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553000415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553000715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553001015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553001315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553001615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553001915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553002215] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553002515] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553002815] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553003115] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553003415] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553003715] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553004015] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553004315] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553004615] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => in_per_minute [args] => Array ( ) [interval] => 60 ) ) ) [1553004915] => Array ( [seopressor_audit_cron] => Array ( [40cd750bba9870f18aada2478b24840a] => Array ( [schedule] => 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By | March 1, 2013 64 Comments

Wisdom: The Serenity Prayer applied to sociopaths

By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired)

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Reinhold Niebuhr

The definition of wisdom

Almost everyone is familiar with the above “serenity prayer,” which is used as part of its program by Alcoholics Anonymous. Until I looked it up, I didn’t know who actually wrote it. What is wisdom, though? Albert Einstein says, “Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.”

Still, that doesn’t tell us exactly what wisdom is. Wisdom is defined by Webster as:

1a: accumulated philosophic or scientific learning: knowledge
1b
: ability to discern inner qualities and relationships: insight
1c
: good sense: judgment
1d
: generally accepted belief
2: a wise attitude, belief, or course of action
3: the teachings of the ancient wise men

According to the Bible, Solomon was the wisest man who ever lived. The story of him deciding who the real mother of a baby being fought over by two women is well known. He said, “I can’t tell who is telling the truth, so let’s just cut the baby in half, giving half to each.” Well, of course, the real mother said, “Oh, no, let her have it, don’t divide the baby.” Then he knew that the mother was the one who had the welfare of the infant first, and so he knew whose baby it was.

Solomon may have been “wise” enough to judge this case before his throne, after all, he wrote the book of Proverbs, which was filled with wise advice to his sons. However, in his own life, he didn’t always act wisely, especially where it came to women.  He had hundreds of wives and concubines. He also let his children do evil. So even though he may have been wise in some areas, in others he was unwise.

Thomas Jefferson is my favorite president. I think his ideas of government finance were very wise; he demanded a totally balanced budget. However, in his own personal budget, he was a spendthrift and didn’t balance his budget in business or personal spending.

So we can see that we may have wisdom in some areas of our lives, and in other areas we may have little wisdom.

My wisdom gets sidetracked

I have found in my own case, that while I generally have “wisdom” in how I conduct myself with people, I frequently fall prey to the “love bomb” that we know psychopaths are so good at. I lack insight into people’s motives and actions if I allow my wisdom to be side tracked by a “love bomb” and allow my own vanity to blind me as to what I should do in dealing with that person.

There are times in my life that I have done things I knew were wrong, immoral, illegal, or just plain bad. But over all I have tried to live a morally upright life, in good graces with my friends, family, my community, and my God. I think most of us at Lovefraud are probably pretty much like I am in this respect. We have consciences, and we try to live within our consciences.

Unfortunately, not everyone has a conscience or empathy or the desire to live a morally upright life in good graces with friends, family, community and whatever Higher Power (if any) they believe in. To interact with this type of person we must learn what they are and how they behave. We must accept that they are not going to change and that nothing we can do is going to effect change with that person, or that relationship.

Maintaining serenity while dealing with a psychopath is extremely difficult. They twist reality (gas lighting), they pathologically lie, they divide our friends and family, and they slander us (smear campaign). They also keep us in the “spin cycle” by a thousand inconsequential problems that they create.

Healing comes from knowing

I’ve often said here that “healing starts out about them, but ends up being about us.” Each day I live makes that statement more firms in my opinion. We must learn about them, so that we know what we are dealing with. But if we get stuck in doing this, if we don’t advance past the learning about them, no matter how much we learn about them, we are not going to develop the wisdom to combat their evil.

After my husband’s death, I found among his papers this quote: “Experience is a hard teacher, she gives the test first, and the lesson afterward.” While writing this article, I found that the quote is attributed to Vernon Law. Psychopaths also give the “test first” and the lesson afterward, because we do not expect that a person can actually be that evil, that mean, that underhanded.

“He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another’s mishap” is another very true quote I ran across about wisdom. There was no citation of the origin, but that makes it no less true. That is one of the really great things in sharing our stories with each other. Not only do we validate each other, but we can gain from the experiences of others, without having to endure those hard lessons personally.

Accepting life

There is a great deal in life that we can’t change no matter what we do. We must accept that or we are like a moth pounding itself to death on the glass globe of a lantern. Accepting those things with a calm mind is difficult, but we can do so. As we move past learning about sociopaths, and move on to learning about ourselves, we gain the wisdom to discern the differences between what we can change and what we can’t and the courage to change what we can.


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Radar_On

Another wonderful posting, Joyce. Many heartfelt thank you’s to you, and everyone here! Makes me realize i need to forgive myself for being so stupid, boundry-less, gullible, you name it! Also, have realized, am more angry at myself than at anyone else! Just, ughhhhhhh! Thanks, Joyce! Sincerely, Radar 🙂

Ox Drover

Radar, glad you enjoyed the article, I think forgiving myself was one of the hardest parts of the healing process. I was supposed to be the healer, not the patient. How could I have been so stupid? How could I have failed to “fix” Patrick? Or my egg donor? I was a failure. Finding LoveFraud and Donna Andersen and Liane Leedom, I realized that if ladies that smart could be totally fooled then I was in good company–smart company! So maybe I wasn’t so dumb after all.

strongawoman

Ox,

“Experience is a hard teacher, she gives the test first, and the lesson afterward.”

Makes me think of something the spath said to me…..
“strongawoman, you need to be taught a lesson”

That’s the only thing he ever said that was true. Lesson learned. Spath face down in dirt. My foot holding his head. Eat my dust.

Brilliant Ox. Thank you.

Mincheff Joyce

Being caring is the characteristic that got us snared. I often hear victims lament that they can never trust again because it brought them so much heartache.

Being wise and caring is the combination of characters that will keep us from repeating the performance as we continue our lives. The knowledge gained from this blog, and various additional supports, can enlighten and protect a myriad of hearts.

Ox Drover

Stronngawoman, yea, they’ve taught us ALL a LESSON. LOL But you know it is one worth knowing because it protects us from the next one down the liine.

Welcome Joyce Mincheff, or is it Minceff, Joyce? LOL Anyway, you’ve come to a good place to learn and heal and help others who share your journey of healing.

EXCELLENT article Oxy!Experience is a very HARD teacher and I’ve always been the type to try to learn the EASY way.But that was not to be,when it came to my marriage-through no fault of mine!

We cannot change what happened to us when we were in relationships with spaths.But,we can CHANGE the direction our lives take from this point on-moving FORWARD AND HEALING.

bluemosaic

Thanks for this article.
The serenity prayer is a truth I was familiar with, pre-spath. I am a program person….have been most of my life.

And yet, I let the spath in…ignoring all year what he was telling me with his actions. He was evil, did not care for or love anyone…least of all me. He used to tell me “he loved me the most”…the most of what? All the women he drained dry of their love and joy? I now think he loved hurting me the most, b/c I am soo emotional and he hated that I can FEEL and he can’t!
I know I cannot change people…not even decent people who have capacity for love and emotion, but just may be in turmoil due to backgrounds that left soul -scar tissue….like my own.
I ignored what my instincts were telling me all year….at the peril of my soul.

This morn, even in the intensity of my current state of anger…and it is high,……I believe the intensity of my anger/pain/rage will turn into intensity of JOY..LOVE…and HEALING…..via the universal truth that we are here to evolve, love one another and share of ourselves with others of like mind and heart….like in LF.

Today…I will be tapping, EFT, praying and believing I can overcome this SPATH-SPERIENCE….even though I am angry with an expletive filled mouth. I will let it out….and then…GOD can do his work on me.

Peace n Hugs to all

Bluemosaic

kmillercats

For anyone who is feeling “stupid” for getting conned….Don’t. Thing I was with targeted smart women. It’s more of a challenge. Look at all the professional women who are on this site. Smart women and I’m guessing ALL the women on this site are smart. I know a lot of you are very quick witted from some of the puns. You all have me in stitches sometimes. Thank goodness. Quick wit and intelligence usually go together. That said…THEY ARE JUST VERY GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO. I never felt stupid. I just didn’t know that these things existed and I was too open and trusting. I would have rather not learned this lesson and most people never learn this lesson. The only time you learn this lesson is when you become emotionally involved. We will all meet sociopaths. The x spath’s minions don’t know they are friends with a spath because they are not emotionally involved. He won’t let that happen because it will blow his entertaining little group of people. So, the odds of becoming ” involved with one” really are very low. Again, back to my bad luck. LOL

It will be kind of interesting in the future to observe and pick out the spaths that I surely will meet. I know…I’m ranting. I guess I need to. Everyone, have a good spath free day:)

bluemosaic

Thx Kmillercats,

What you had to say, I really needed to hear today. I was way too open/trusting…gave him an inlet. It shows me where I still need to grow…to be an empowered / whole human being.
Thx for telling us all…we are not stupid., b/c I do feel foolish for the amount of love and nurturing I gave to a man that felt nothing for me but a desire to destroy. Mind numbing shock, the evil under a spath….It will change the way I perceive others and when it is safe to trust.

Blue

mich0101

I am starting to realize that it was easy for me to fall prey to him because I grew up like that. My father has sociopathic traits and I never would have guessed. He never bonded with us. I could never have a conversation with him. He was an alcholic and he seemed to live a double life. He left my mom when I 20. I have had very little contact with him, and I am in my 40’s. And I always told my friends my spath was just like my dad. Hard to connect with, hard to talk to. I thought it was normal.

kmillercats

I miss a lot of post’s on the weekends. I don’t have computer access at home and I only work one out of 7 weekends. I was reading post’s from around the 23rd. I’ll have to catch up on those. I feel like you are all my friends and we have this special club. Not a club I ever thought I’d belong to or wanted to for that matter. Nothing personal and I know nobody else wanted to be part of the club but, the support is really good.

Thanks to all. Going home now to take care of me and my animals

Laura19

Kmillercats,

Thank you for your post. I occasionally still doubt if my ex was REALLY a spath–as in someone without normal feelings, which seems so unbelievable–because I was never able to talk with his ex wives, and so I only have my own experience and what his new girlfriend told me about their relationship to go on. My story also isn’t nearly as terrible as some of the ones I’ve read; he never abused me to my face in the way that so many of them do. He always tried to keep the mask on with me, to the end. He never did the triangulation thing with me. When I found out about the new girlfriend, he blocked me from seeing his FB page. And the only reason I know about the other women he slept with behind my back is because the new girlfriend said he confessed that to her, and then she told me. All of that makes me doubt my diagnosis. And I’ve really been thrown off by the fact that he still has what seem to be good connections to his family (the new girl met many of them very quickly; I only met a few of them once), and he also has long-term friendships. I kept wondering, why would they want to keep a pathological liar, a completely immoral, very mean person in their lives??

So, what you wrote…YES, I did not know people like this existed! YES, they ARE good at what they do! And YES, I too was so open and trusting! And what you wrote about the minions…it really helped me understand why he still has those relationships. Maybe he lies to them here or there, but like you said, it’s not the same kind of emotional involvement that I had with him. The more I read about the stories of others here on LF, the more I learn about sociopathy/psychopathy, and the more I think about my relationship with him and the extensive lies he told ME, the more I realize that he is solidly on the sociopathic spectrum. And it’s important to me to be confident about that because I want to have an explanation for his behavior. And labeling him a sociopath really does explain it! And that, in a weird way, gives me comfort. So thank you.

Ox Drover

Laura, it doesn’t matter if he is a full on psychopath or just a JERK, he iis TOXIC to you, and THAT’s what matters. You were not stupid and in fact the fact that most of the wo/men here are professionals and smart is what made me feel validated here. When people with MD or PhD behind their names get conned, well I feel I’m not so dumb after all. 🙂

Laura19

Thank you for your response, Ox, and thank you for all of your excellent articles, too. I know in the end, when I am fully healed, it won’t matter what, exactly, he is. I guess that I just can’t make sense of his behavior unless I look at from the perspective of psychopathy. And I realize that psychopathy is a spectrum, not an either/or scenario. I have been trying to trust in that…all of the pieces REALLY DO fit together when I look at him and what he did through that lens.

Absolutely, I am impressed with all of the posters here on LF! And by the way, Ox, I’ve been making my way through the Aftermath Radio podcasts. It’s nice to put a voice to all of your posts/articles. I feel like I’ve been in touch with a celebrity! 🙂

Ox Drover

Laura, LOL ROTFLMAO “Celebrity” LOL ROTYFLMAO yea, that’s me all right!

I can’t stand to listen to my recorded voice and my Arkansas TWANG! LOL It’s odd but when you hear yourself speak as you are talking you hear it through your head bones and it sounds different than when it is recorded and you hear it through your ears.

Laura, just keep on that “healing road” because healing is a spectrum too…as long as we live we are learning and growing, so keep on that road! I learn new things each and every day!

Laura19

I agree, our own voice does sound different through our own head, doesn’t it?

Thank you so much for your support…I will definitely keep on that healing road! And I still think you’re a celebrity!!

bluemosaic

I have read this through a second time within a couple days…interesting how as my perception changes and my awareness grows, I am slightly more in tune with the discernment that I “see” I must cultivate.

Thank you Joyce for these ‘Lights” that your post set off in my head..

To note ; It is wonderful to be caring…deadly to be caring without wisdom.

“Experience is a hard teacher, she gives the test first,and the lesson afterwards.”

This is the script for the life I have lived.

He tested me from day one, I failed every test….he knew I was the perfect victim. I opened my heart/soul at every command. Like a child playing simon-says.

It will be about me when I am past my anger…LF is a hiking staff to get me through a treacherous trail.

The validation and sharing here is so valuable to me…I am not ok yet…I needed the help getting out of the trench I crawled into. LF is a rope ladder, ointment for wounds and a light to the path of healing.
Thank you for your shared wisdom.

Blue

dorothy2

Bluemosaic, beautiful honest words.
I was thinking about your question….am I a Spath? Was it me?
I’ve asked myself the same questions. I see spathy elements to myself, especially when I was younger. My background is perfect for me or become a Spath or at least borderline, narcissistic, etc.. And maybe I was/ am to some degree. However, I think the difference here is that I know I’m willing, and God knows I am, to feel my own pain, deal with my self and my injuries, be responsible, accountable, etc….basically wipe my own ass to the best of my ability. They are not. They want to stay in the crib, poop on themselves and others, play with their pee pee and have someone else clean up the mess. They want someone else to do the heavy lifting so that their precious time can be spent doing the above.
As adults, the crib is the bar, the bottle is now filled with alcohol…….my Spath is now back at mommys and she is more than willing to play the roll that I refused to play..

Truthspeak

Joyce………..FANTASTIC ARTICLE, and I appreciate the discussion of “wisdom.”

I’ve been familiar with the Serenity Prayer since 1975, and I’ve uttered the words, but most often not “felt” the core of their meaning. “Acceptance” is the key term, I believe. I also believe that acceptance of my spath experiences doesn’t necessarily mean that I am obligated to “like” the lessons that I learned, but that those painful experiences were probably the only way that I could LEARN.

By accepting that I have issues that can be exploited, and that there really are predatory human beings, I don’t have to “feel” badly about setting up boundaries and sticking to them.

I also believe – as this applies to me, personally – that I understand the difference between “humble,” and “humiliation.” I have been humbled by my experiences and I am truly grateful that I’ve learned some of the things that I really needed to know about myself.

There is, truly, a “serenity” in acceptance, even if I don’t like the facts. They are what they are, and I’m no longer obligated to “feel” that I can somehow change the facts.

Again, thank you so much for this article!

Brightest blessings

Ox Drover

Blue, you said “”LF is a hiking staff to get me through a treacherous trail.

The validation and sharing here is so valuable to me”I am not ok yet”I needed the help getting out of the trench I crawled into. LF is a rope ladder, ointment for wounds and a light to the path of healing.

THAT SOUNDS LIKE WISDOM TO ME.

I can’t remember who said it, but someone said “knowledge is what we learn, WISDOM is what we do with it.”

Truthy, your post above does ring with WISDOM as well…accepting, humble, but not humiliated, can lead to the wisdom and serenity that we want and need.

Dorthy, yep, bottles and diapers and someone else to take care of both.

bluemosaic

Hi To All,

Dorothy2, I think that I started to identify with him too much. I can be selfish, and I’m sure other non desirable things too…but the truth is I feel for and care deeply for every family/freind I have . When I make mistakes, I own it. I care very much when I do hurt another and I try very hard not to. I think in my hysteria of being confused by him on WTF actually happened, I allowed him to convince me I am as sick as he is…the dust is starting to settle and though I surely need to build proper boundaries…I can love and I don’t use people. So…I am at peace now knowing I am not like him.

Truthspeak, This experience humbled me too, and I agree with acceptance being huge.

Thx Ox Drover,
The knowledge…wisdom claification is…so true.
Thx again to you all for this place to get it thru my head and heart what my part was….slow but sure progress.

Blue

bluemosaic

Just really meditating on acceptance today…
accepting that ..I loved a man…he did not love me.
” ” … he used me…I let him
” “…my boundaries were so weak, I did not protect myself from him
Accepting that even though I require respect, honoring treatment,faithfulness,reciprocity in giving and caring…I allowed myself to stay in a relationship where these things were not present with consistency.
Accept the fact that I disavowed my instincts …giving his words more credence than my own gut and spriritual guide within. I gave him my power….
A man who loves me, will not ask me for my power …he will not require that I hand over my power to protect my well being and then use that leverage to damage me.
Well learn to put my armor on, cloak myself in protective colors…stay concious. I went unconciuos with him…I accept this too.

Blue

dorothy2

Blue..AMEN. I basically prostituted myself, tolerated the intolerable, for companionship and the illusion of love. I loved him, yes but I loved the person he was pretending to be so that I didn’t see the person he was. I questioned the validity of his mask the entire time we were together and chose to accept his version rather than mine, all the while allowing myself to be taken advantage of and used for his selfish desires. Blah!
You said it perfectly. You really have a way with words. Thank you!
D2

dorothy2

I’ve been reading Anna’s blogs on various narcissistic topics and its really putting a lot into words I can hear. It’s the Narcissists Suck blog and her articles are incredible. All of these websites are amazing. LF, 180 Rule, Anna’s.
incredible wisdom.

Truthspeak

Bluemosaic, one of the glaring truths about “acceptance” is that one is not morally, legally, or ethically obligated to “LIKE” what they’re choosing to accept as factual.

I bucked, whined, and fought my way through acceptance that the exspath set me up for a very long con to access my finances, only. All else was an illusion. I didn’t like this fact. Truth be told, I hated it. But, the choice to either accept the fact, or not, became a surrender of control for me. I couldn’t control whether the exspath’s illusion was fact or fiction – I did not have the power to alter the facts.

The ugly fact is that I loved an illusion – not a man who didn’t love me back. What was incapable of loving me back is an organism that walks, talks, eats, sleeps, eliminates, and goes through all of the motions of what “normal” human beings do, but he is utterly inhuman and only MIMICS a human being. So, accepting that fact allowed me to recognize that I have nothing to be ashamed of – no self-deprecation, no self-blame. I was targeted. I was set up. And, I was laid low by a predatory organism that mimics a human being.

“…accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.” I cannot change the fact that the exspath was an illusionist. I cannot change the fact that I believed in the integrity of the illusion. I cannot change the fact of what was done to me for the sole purpose of money and access to it. I cannot change the fact that my finances are gone, and will NEVER be recovered. I cannot change Laws to my benefit. These are cold, hard, ugly, nasty, and unpleasant facts. But, I always have a CHOICE to either accept them, or not.

“Love” is not something that I have much faith in, anymore – certainly not romantic love. There’s always a catch with “love” and there are only 3 sources of unconditional love – agape. Pets, Great Creator, and myself. All others have underlying motives, even within platonic friendships and relationships. So, it’s a constant work-in-progress to secure my boundaries, across the boards. I don’t “like” this, either, but it’s given me the ability (luxurious ability) to pick, choose, and ignore whom I will allow into my circle.

Yepper……….lots of wisdom out there, and I’m drinking it all in as fast as I can. More than anything, I need to recover.

***Strictly Aside: I DO NOT refer to the exspath as “my exspath,” or “mine” in any discussion. As soon as the mask fell off, he ceased to belong to me on any level. He is THE exspath. THE spath. THE ex. He is nameless, faceless, and soul-less. I accept no association with any predatory human being.

Brightest blessings

Ox Drover

Dorthy, we can learn from many sources…blogs, books, friends, spiritual mentors etc. but the things we learn are worthless unless we put them into PRACTICE.

That’s where the wisdom shows fruit in the form of recovery and healing….growing even.

We start out learning about THEM, but in the end, when we start to heal is when we must lear about OURSELVES, and as Donna said, face and resolve those childhood issues from our family of origin. We can do it. It’s work, and it takes time, but it iis well worth it.

dorothy2

Truthspeak, what a motivational post and I love your idea about not claiming THE SPATH. Another step in the right direction. When I sent the Spath my final parting email, after telling him that as far as I’m concerned he’s someone that I never knew, a fake and a parasitic imposter, then rescinded any declarations of caring about him, it was the first time I didn’t sign with I love and care about you no matter what or something to that effect.
That was a big move for me. It was a huge letting go and reflected that this was all a sham…..he is a sham. It was scary pushing the send button with those words on the page but looking back on it now, it was right. I will never say those words, the same words that flowed from his mouth sooooo easily from very early in the ” relationship “…… Too easily….., I will never say them again until I’m sure the person I say them to is someone who deserves to hear them.

dorothy2

Thanks Oxy, yes…..this all did start by me trying to learn about him….wanting to fix him…..wanting to KNOW what he really was and hoping he could turn the corner and be someone safe. What a clever trick I played on myself to get me to see ME! That’s what has happened and continues to happen through all the research and reading and blog comments and stories and articles.
I see now that I was not only having smoke blown up my ass by him but also by myself. I didn’t want to face the truth and accept the reality and he was more than happy to accommodate me in that way.
I’m certainly not making excuses for him but I do see the part I played and how it ties into my childhood pattern of trying to get those around me to change and be the parents I needed them to be….to be safe, to keep me safe.
Spath was actually my whole family wrapped up into one package. Elements of my mother, my father and my Spath brother all right there in front of me for my viewing pleasure. But I just didn’t want to “get it”. I SAW it but I didn’t want to get it.

Ox Drover

Dorthy, that seeing but not believing is called “denial” and the trying to “fix” them is “enabling” them and my hand is waving wildly as I say ME TOO!!!! Though I did have some nurturing from my step father and my grandparents, I had none from my egg donor, and only abuse from P sperm donor once I got to know him.

I was programmed to be responsible for the happiness of others in my circle of friends and family. If someone was unhappy it was my fault and my responsibility to fix it. I also had t play “let’s pretend we’re a nice normal family” and more value was placed on what the neighbors thought about us than what we really WERE.

But even at 66 years old I am learning the things I should have learned as a child. Like Truthy says, too, ACCEPTING them is important. We don’t have to LIKE something to accept it as WHAT IS AND WHAT WE CAN NOT CHANGE. We can change the future but not the past. We learn, that’s knowledge, we put knowledge into practice, that’s wisdom. Wisdom leads to peace. Serenity.

cherith10

Woke up in the muck of self-doubt. After more than 25 years of marriage and tears that could fill a bottle, I flipped through the Love Blog articles and came upon Serenity Prayer. My daughter asked me last night, incredulous, “You don’t want to see him anymore?” and the truth of that finality bore down upon me. I actually feel regret that it is over. I stand in a cell and stare at a prison door that has unlocked and flung open. I realize that the husband fed upon my grief in vampire fashion. I know that I can’t change him or my reality, even if that relationship produced nine off-spring, children I love. Dorothy2, you’re courage inspires me. Joyce, your article was a gentle push toward the door.

kim frederick

Very wise artical, Oxy.
I fiirst came upon this idea of “acceptance” through my invilvement with twelve step programs. I was involved with them in the early phase of recovery from spath x.
It used to piss me off, honestly, because it forced me to move out of victim mode, when I wasn’t yet ready to give up my victim status, and placed the focus completely on me. Kind of sucked. But, as strange as it sounds, it gives ME back my power. It makes me responsible for my choices.
I know, some in the early stages may not be ready for this, and may feel nothing but resistance, but, I post this gem about acceptance straight out of The Big Book of AA.
It applys to everybody, with any kind of problem:
http://alcoholism.about.com/cs/tools/a/102297.htm

Ox Drover

Kimmie, thank you VERRY much for posting that link! It says exactly what I was TRYING to say.

In the book I read on Mindfulness Meditation for beginners it talked about the Budhhist beliefs and essentially it was about ACCEPTANCE of what is. Not trying to change the unchangeable.

Acceptance is HARD I admit, but it is what allows us to heal. Without it we are miserable.

CHERITH, only WE can step through that door into FREEDOM. And Freedom can be scary…because we are RESPONSIBLE for ourselves. Like adults should be. Anytime someone else is responsible for us THEY have the control. Don’t give away that power. Freedom may be scary at FIRST but in the end, it is really amazing!

kim frederick

Damn. Just lost a post to cyber-space. Will try again.
Cherith, I so get where you’re at. I remember feeling the same way; like I was in a jail cell, with the door flung open. All I had to do was run through it, but, I was immoblized by my own fears, and by his effectively installing those fears, and by the trauma bonding. You must be vigilent of the moldy crust of bread, ploy.
After having been locked away and starved, you are in danger of slamming the door shut on yourself for a measily crust of bread.
On the other side of that door, a banquet is layed out for you.
We have been conditioned to fear. We have been taught to believe that the moldy crust of bread is better than nothing, and probably more than we deserve. We have had our self-confidance systematically destroyed.
When they see that it has finally become bad enough, that we are willing to make the break, in spite of our fears and self-doubt, they will swoop in, at the last minute with a crumb, to keep you in place.
So, Cherith, I am sending you encouragement, and asking you to RUN toward the door. The only way out, is through, and I know you can do it.

dorothy2

Kim, , very nicely worded message of encouragement to Cherith and us all. Someone told me on 180 Rule….early on after the Spath became Spath x, that I was standing on the edge of a cliff ready to throw myself off because I thought I saw a glimmer of gold at the bottom. Well, I didn’t heed the warning, slipped and got slimed. I guess I needed one more dose of Spath reality before I could walk away KNOWING how sick he is. He offered me the moldy piece of bread and I grabbed it, choked on it and thank god I didn’t fall all the way to the bottom of that cliff. This all took place over the Internet through email.
Run Cherith Run!!
Oxy…..
Thank you for your feedback as usual. Interesting how you discribe your family, I can so relate! Especially to the “lets pretend” game. Us too. We were all assigned our roles to play in mothers little show while out and about on parade but behind the scenes there was a whole different show going on, one without a happy, fairy tail ending. My Spath brother and I were both adopted and I think they got us thinking it would be like buying a car. You go to the dealership (adoption agency) , pick out one you like ( think is going to complete YOUR picture), take it home and drive it all over town. I think they thought they were going to come home with a shiny showroom model and instead got a couple of manufactured defects. Yes……things didn’t go as planned to say the least ! Train wreck, one Trama drama after another. AND…the icing on the cake……papa bear is adopted too and one of the most self centered, emotionally retarded men I’ve ever known. No sex life for mama bear, no emotional connection, no affection….zip, zilch, nada. Poor mama bear.. But didn’t she look good in all those nice clothes and with his family name after hers? Sold her soul to the devil, she did.
Neither one of them were what I would consider ” bad” people but certainly ill equipped to raise children, let alone adopted children who came into the world with a bag of shit in tow.
Yeah,,,, I’ve got some work to do.
Thanks to all of you for your wise words on acceptance. Thank you so much.
D2

dorothy2

I think the only way to look at a Spath clearly is through a rear view mirror! It’s something to do with the 180 rule and how a mirror reverses everything!

Dorothy,
Hahahaha! that’s a good way of stating it!
The rear view mirror also makes them look smaller and smaller as we put the pedal to the metal and get the heck away from them.

dorothy2

Skylar, as Spath used to say…”kick it!”
Hammer down! Lol
I’d like to be looking in my rear view mirror the next time his train gets derailed!
I SO want to be there if and when karma pays him a visit.

Louise

kim:

Thanks so much for the serenity link. I am going to meditate on this…

linda816

The Talmud says “A wise person is one who sees the outcome”. That was my defining moment; I saw the outcome of the situation and knew that it was time for me to get out of this marriage. Almost a year later and thankful that I had the courage and insite to end an impossible situation.
Thank you for this site. It has been wonderful to see that I was not alone.

Truthspeak

Linda816, congratulations on taking steps to recover. It is, indeed, courageous to acknowledge and accept that a situation has no possible solution and to put an end to the misery. I’m glad you’re here.

Brightest blessings

Barb

We should feel sorry for these people. They are empty inside. No joy in their lives. Catatonic or charismatic, they are soul-less beings without shame.

Truthspeak

Babs, I “pity” their existences but, I do not feel sorry for them. I feel sorry for their victim targets who were exploited to the Nth Degree.

What spaths do to others are a series of choices, not side-effects or anything that can be explained by an organic source. They choose to target, ensnare, exploit, and discard other human beings for their own entertainment and purposes. No, I don’t feel sorry for them, at all.

Brightest blessings

lovingthem

Joyce, thanks for this article. I really like the line, “He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another’s mishap.” This truth gives me hope because it allows me to see that perhaps something good could come out of the hell that no good spath perpetrated in my life. If someone can learn from what I’ve been through and avoid the pain I’ve endured, I can one day say that something good came out of it all.

I’m really struggling these days with anger and despair. I think it’s because I still have to deal with him because we have children together. He treats them with such blatant disregard and pathological insensitivity, and I feel for them every time they have to go over there. I just wish he’d drop dead and leave them alone. It’s so hard to heal when the wounds are constantly reopened. He calls them twice a day (I hate the sound of my ringing phone) and fills their ears with hollow words, “I love you. I miss you. I can’t wait to see you darling.” I want to throw up because it’s so fake. They hate it too but we are court ordered to take 2 phone calls a day from him.

So he calls twice a day to tell them how much he loves them but and how he can’t wait to see them, but when they get there he won’t feed them (I have to pack their meals and even then he sometimes won’t let them eat what I’ve packed). He makes them eat stuff they’ve dropped on the floor. He’ll go to a drive-thru with them and not get them anything. He won’t allow them to have a blanket when they complain about being cold. He won’t let them spend their own money on anything unless they agree to leave it at his apartment, but then he puts their toys in the closet on a high shelf and won’t let them play with them when they are there. So, they have money to spend (from birthdays, Christmas etc) but they won’t buy anything because they know they won’t get to take it home but they won’t be allowed to play with it over there either. Oh, but he loves them desperately, misses them constantly and calls them “darling.”

I know there are far worse injustices a child could face, and I’m thankful that he doesn’t hit them, but he makes them feel worthless. They wonder what’s wrong with them that he treats them this way. I tell them it’s him, not them, but I don’t know if they believe that or not.

Anyway, how do you heal yourself when you have to watch your children being hurt by the monster you were able to (thankfully) escape?

Ox Drover

Oh, Loviingthem, I hear the pain in your post, and there truly is no way to change what is happening, it is OUT OF YOUR CONTROL, but you MUST ACCEPT YOU CAN’T CHANGE IT, but what you can do is to comfort your children, and you know what? HE WILL NOT HAVE THE LAST LAUGH IN THIS…l promise you, there will come a time SOON when these kids will “get it” about him and they will be old enough that the court will NOT make them go to see him.

He realiizes that he is hurting YOU by hurting the kids, and so you must come to ACCEPT what is happening is out of your control. Kids are NOT stupid so they will figure him out pretty soon.

Eating food dropped on the floor is not likely to kill them, and they are not going to starve to death because he won’t feed them, but you know this is ammunition in YOUR gun because at some time soon these kids will tell the judge this, or you can call CPS and report him.

Get your kids into therapy ASAP if you can at all. But in the meantime, tell them that HOW ANYONE (not specifically HIM) treats them iis not their fault, that there are some people who say “I love you” but do not ACT like they do love you, but it is NOT you that is the problem, it is THEM. And just keep on SHOWING your kids that you love them, they will see the differences. God bless…and YES you can heal even in the midst of all this. (((Hugs)))

Hopeforjoy

Dear Lovingthem,

You sound like a very compassionate mom and I can hear how much it pains you to send your kids to a place that you know is toxic. You probably get the same sick feeling that I do everytime my son goes to his father’s house. It’s hard. It’s not right.

Hang in there. Your kids will get it, it sounds like they already understand a lot. If you model a loving, kind parent (the kind I know you are), they will know that it is safe at your house and they’ll want to be with you.

It feels counter intuitive to not bash the spath, but please try not to. Be the best parent you can be. I know how incredible hard it is. The serenity prayer is really useful during the times when your kids are over there. I used to think the prayer was kind of trite, but not any more!

Therapy helps so much with the kind of pain you’re feeling. It helps to process everything and I have found some things I can do to ease the injustice of the situation.

Hang in there! You are a loving mom and that means a great deal!

NoContact

I wrote a poem yesterday, and realized it was a Grey Rock poem:

Grains of truth in a sea of lies, I have strained the sand for them to build a small rock on which to stand.
(Just for the moment — for the hour — for the day.)
I will gather grains.
What is not True will fall back into the mist around me
Sloshing at my ankles
Pulling me under with relentless yanking
My soul de-anchored, adrift in pain.
Tiny grains, hard and cold, for my feet to stand,
I’ve come to appreciate every one of them.
Bitter, glassy grains like shards of bone
Ugly, gray-brown grains with awkward edges, but
At least they are Real.

I think.

Delores

Oxy, et al,
Great article. I was in Alanon for years after the alcoholic psychopath and I love the serenity prayer. It was also very hard to wrap my brain around acceptance which I thought meant condoning. I walked away from my marriage healthier than I had ever been. I stayed long enough to know what was happening and to know that a single life with my children would be better than life with him.

I had a wonderful ten years of being career woman and mother I was self-sufficient, successful and responsible. I added party animal to the agenda after a year of solitude and I did the things I did not get to do as a young adult. I decreed to never need anyone again. I laughed and said I lead three lives and I loved every minute. I thought I had wisdom, balance and acceptance. I did have great happiness.

After ten years I met my husband and remarried. Both of us, once burned badly, never planned to get married again. I fought it but knew he was the only one if I ever was willing to take the chance. That was 30 years ago and it has not been easy but it has been worth it. We have both grown from being together and are best friends. I still get POed wen I feel like I need him but we are getting older and do need each other. Acceptance is coming and perhaps more wisdom.

Over the past ten years I went another round with the psychopath over my daughter’s wedding and her forcing him into our lives. I finally just said no and wrote him completely out of my life . The children did not like it. The sperm donor targeted my daughter and we lost her and grandchildren. I was partly to blame because I told the truth and stood up for myself. I am now recovering from that.

As hard as it is (and I cannot imagine much that could be any harder) I am finally free again from his evil. We moved out of state and I am regaining a new harder acceptance, grieving for the loss that went with him and healing. In hind sight I could have done it better but I was set up again and I lost big this time.

I accept it. I do not like it one iota. Someday I will see my grandchildren again. They love us and we love them. We do get to talk to them on the phone occasionally but are not allowed to see them. My current wisdom is to take this opportunity to have fun before we are too old. My sister’s death in January gave me an imminent need to live life now. So I am seeking Spiritual growth and diving into my bucket list. What is right NOW is only what we make of it.

As God is my witness, psychopathy will not take up another second of my life! All y’all are so wonderful. Peace to you.

kim frederick

Nice poem ColoradoKathy. Thanks.

Ox Drover

Betsybugs,

Your daughter, I am afraid, is “just like her father” and I truly believe that there iis NOTHING YOU COULD HAVE DONE that would have changed the situation. I wish,, and I know you do, that your daughter was not like this, but ACCEPTANCE means not that you condone it, but that you recognize what IS. That’s all.

By standing up, and not allowing your daughter to CONTROL you, and she had no right to do so, she punishes not only you, but her own children…that is psychopathic behavior.

I’m glad that you and hubby have moved away and that you can now do some things on your bucket list. We can’t control what others do, only our selves, and love those that love you back.

Delores

Lovingthem,

I know what it is like because I have been there. At first I thought he could not do that much harm. I asked him to pay half the tuition for private school for our son who was being traumatized in a forced busing situation and he said no; then I realized that he was trying to take my son away. I quickly and quietly sold the house and moved hundreds of miles away from him.

It was nice but there is no getting rid of them. He soon lured my son away with a car; separated him from his sister too just so sperm donor could go schmooze at the high school football games…at a private school none the less.

And now after all my efforts to protect my children, he tore my daughter away from me, convinced her that I am the problem and she took away my grandchildren. My advice to you is to cut all contact. If I had known then what I know now, I would have given up child support and cut all contact.

These guys are lethal not hitting the children is nothing, there are much worse things than hitting, like destroying their minds. I did not know how bad it could be. I was trusting and naive even after the divorce and thought my children needed a father. They did but they did not need him; even when e was acting like a good father he was undermining them or me. I learned over a period of decades how bad it can be. There were respites but that was only a false sense of security.

I watched second and third wives, step children and my own children be pawns to this bloodsucking parasite and get smashed like bugs but they all got away except me. My daughter did not get away either, she just lost her mind and turned on me. I wish he had just died and saved everyone so much misery.

Oxy, no doubt that daughter’s behavior is as you say. But mine was less than exemplary too. Psychopaths can bring out the very worst in us. Either you are correct or she is just so brainwashed she may never recover. In any event, I have no choice but to give up on her for now but I am burning no more bridges.

I had my horoscope done years and years ago and the poor woman who did it was terrified by what she saw. Now I guess I know why. Vampires do exist!

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