2008 | Page 5 of 19 | Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths

Is this person a jerk, a narcissist or a sociopath?

October 24, 2008 // by Liane Leedom, M.D.// 161 Comments

I do my best to read all of the comments on lovefraud.com because I think they are a good barometer as to what people are thinking and questioning. One recent theme/question has been the issue of the realm of jerkdom. Just what is a jerk? Merriam-Webster's online dictionary defines a jerk as an annoyingly stupid or foolish person b: an unlikable person ; especially one who is cruel, rude, or small-minded. But how would a psychologist approach answering this question? Psychologists studying personality tend to fall into two categories, with members of the first category being far more numerous. The first category of psychologists is composed of trait psychologists. A trait psychologist is …

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Exploiters seek partners who dread to displease them

October 23, 2008 // by Steve Becker, LCSW// 677 Comments

It is no accident that narcissistic and sociopathic personalities will seek, and often successfully attract, partners who have their own issue: a tendency to dread the idea of disappointing or displeasing them. This is admittedly a generality, but it's a pattern I've observed in my clinical experience, and it makes sense. The exploiter, who regards others as existing principally to satisfy his or her wants on a continual basis, must by definition find in a mate someone who is highly motivated—and especially, highly afraid not—to satisfy him or her. Thus one often finds the pairing of an exploiter complemented by a partner who is prone, perhaps compulsively, to look inward to himself or her …

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A springboard to a new life with a new mindset?

October 17, 2008 // by Liane Leedom, M.D.// 472 Comments

Last Friday Robin Hoffman interviewed me again on her radio show, The Feminine Soul. We discussed recovering from a relationship with a sociopath. She asked two very important questions, “How do we avoid picking another sociopath in the future?” and “How can we ever trust our instincts again?” Coincidentally, yesterday I received this letter from a reader: I got involved recently with a man who seemed to be the opposite of my previous psychopath. All the traits I like, strong, dominant, etc but seemed to have a good heart, and importantly a good history. I checked him out, he had a long service in the police force and a voluntary youth organization, was widely respected and successful. …

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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: The Marine and the sociopath

October 16, 2008 // by Donna Andersen// 122 Comments

My name is Jonathan L. Spear. I serve in the United States Marine Corps. All my life I have considered myself a strong minded person who is kind hearted and loving of the world. I help all I can, I give strangers rides, I take in my friends who have fallen on bad times and help them get back on their feet and am willing to die for those I love and even people I don't know. I am currently stationed near Baghdad, Iraq and well we don't have a whole lot to do out here so I was watching a movie and there was this girl in it who said she has been called a sociopath by doctors but before they said that I had noticed that this girl had acted a lot like one of my ex's. So I decided to do some …

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Updates: More proof that sociopaths just don’t quit

October 13, 2008 // by Donna Andersen// 119 Comments

True Lovefraud Stories, on Lovefraud.com, is a series of case studies illustrating how con artists and people who would probably be diagnosed as sociopaths ply their trade. Months, and sometimes years, have passed since these individuals were profiled. But according to updates we've heard, they're still pulling their scams. If you are still trying to believe that the predator you were involved with will see the light and change his or her behavior, read these stories. You'll see that it's not going to happen. Once a sociopath becomes an adult, he or she does not change. Dennis SanSeverino Since February, Trish Rynn, who lost her home and inheritance to Dennis SanSeverino, has been …

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Report says Sarah Palin abused power by trying to fire bad cop

October 11, 2008 // by Donna Andersen// 8 Comments

Can you imagine the unbridled glee Mike Wooten is feeling right now? Wooten, of course, is the trooper at the center of Troopergate. That's the controversy in which Sarah Palin, and her husband, Todd, are alleged to have abused the Alaska governor's power in trying to get rid of the explosive, deceitful and unremorseful cop. I'll bet Mike Wooten is high-fiving everyone in sight. I'll bet he even bought a round of drinks for everyone in the Mugshot Saloon. Mike Wooten, who in my opinion is a sociopath, has won, and sociopaths love to win. Antisocial behavior I wrote about this case on September 1—It looks like Sarah Palin is under Troopergate investigation because of a sociopath. In it, I p …

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Sociopathic children and psychopathic traits during childhood

October 10, 2008 // by Liane Leedom, M.D.// 249 Comments

This is a very tragic story left by one of our readers: My daughter was misdiagnosed with ADHD. Then bipolar disorder, then Oppositional Defiance Disorder. I stormed out of her psychologist office when she told me that she saw something “dark” in my child. That was when she was 7. When she was 8, her sociopathy increased and she purposely drowned my poodle. She also tried to smother my baby by my second husband. The strain of her and my carrying the baggage from my last relationship has driven he and I apart and we currently trying to file for divorce. She steals daily, has even stolen as much as $500 from my wallet. I lock things away, and she will simply pry open the lock, break the …

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The Sociopath Next Door? Probably Not

October 9, 2008 // by Steve Becker, LCSW// 120 Comments

Clearly the LoveFraud community, better than anyone, can testify to the reality of sociopaths and the damage they can inflict on others. Sociopaths exist. That is inarguable. The sociopath is someone, as we know, with a grossly deficient respect for the integrity and boundaries of others; someone who sizes others up principally as assets to be exploited for his or her own whims and needs. The sociopath is a remorseless user and taker. At the same time, I think it's worth noting that sociopathy, in general, makes for sensational copy, as a result of which estimations of its incidence in the general population are at risk, I would argue, of being dubiously, irresponsibly inflated. Martha …

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The sociopath in my life: a journey to real healing

October 6, 2008 // by Donna Andersen// 663 Comments

Editor's note: The following article refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. As I was wondering what to write about for my blog article this week, Southernman429 did me a favor and provided a topic. He posted the following on Dr. Leedom's most recent article: I'd like to pose a question to Donna, M.L., and Dr. Leedom”¦ Is it normal to go on with your life”¦ develop new relationships”¦ have new goals and new ideals”¦ years go by”¦ basically move on from the sociopathic experience”¦ but yet”¦ still feel a emptiness in a part of your heart, or a tugging at your soul”¦ a sort of grieving”¦ maybe partly for them, or about them, but also about y …

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Can victims become like the psychopath?

October 3, 2008 // by Liane Leedom, M.D.// 163 Comments

This week we received the following email: My daughter is married to a man I consider a psychopath. My daughter has not spoken with me for many months. She has totally changed her personality, voice, she says things she never would have said before, she attacks me to my friends. My daughter and her husband seem to have their own version of reality, truth, and morality that is not consistent with those outside her marriage or in the world. My husband doesn't want to invite them to our house for the holidays or have anything to do with them. I feel the same way, too, because of their attacks and saying things that are not true about us. I have gotten advice on this blog to try and have a …

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recovery46 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: He assured me he would never, could never hurt me like that again: “Bernice—it’s 2025 and my experience with the spath was EXACTLY the same! I kept rereading bc all the details were…”
sept4 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Letting go of monetary justice is releasing the ties that bind: “This is what I actually struggle with most now that I am a decade out of divorce. I did not…”
Donna Andersen on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “Good point! Thank you”
sept4 on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “All very true and very good advice. I would like to add that too can always call police if you…”
eleanoreliza1234 on When bad behavior shows symptoms, not flaws : “What a beautifully composed response by Emilie 18! Reassuring to know that others have experienced the same. Thank you, Emilie.”