How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: A sociopath in a very senior position

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Editor's note: The following letter was sent by the Lovefraud reader "Speakout." Have you ever wondered what happens when your sociopath goes to the office? Where to start ”¦ I should begin by saying that my experience included getting to know his ex-wife after I was fired, reading the transcripts and emails of their seemingly endless divorce. She is the one who opened my eyes. I reacted poorly to her when she first told me about her experiences with him; I sat there in stunned silence. I had to let it sink in. She told me later that my response confused her. I had no idea such creatures as him existed. I'm a girl geek I'm not good with feelings and people. Some highlights that de …

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How to dump a sociopath

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Suppose you realize that you're in an unhealthy romantic relationship. Or, your instincts are telling you that the person in hot pursuit of you is bad news. How do you end the involvement? When you're romantically involved with reasonably normal individuals, you usually try to spare their feelings. You don't come out and say that they're boring, or needy, or oafish, even if that's what you feel. You make up excuses. You tell them that you're getting back with an old boyfriend or girlfriend, even if that's a lie. You say you're just not ready for a relationship right now, even if that's also a lie. In essence, when breaking up with an okay person who just isn't your type, you try to let …

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The links between callous-unemotional traits in children and antisocial behavior

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Dr. Essi Viding of University College London discusses recent findings on the genetic roots of callous-unemotional traits in children, and how they may evolve into antisocial behavior. Callous-unemotional traits in children, on PsychologicalScience.org.   …

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A neuroscientist and his psychopathic brain

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James Fallon, Ph.D., a professor of psychiatry, human behavior, anatomy and neurobiology, discovered that his own brain matches the brains of diagnosed psychopaths. In this radio interview, he talks about psychopaths, their brains, and why he didn't turn into an exploiter. Am I a psychopath? on ScienceFriday.com.   …

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The long criminal history of John R. Sperry, formerly John R. Gorbich

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Sometime between 1966 and 1969, according to Stacey Jaccodie, John R. Gorbich of Neptune, New Jersey, changed his name to John R. Sperry. Gorbich had plenty of reason to want a new name. He was arrested in 1956 for stealing parts from his employer, the Monmouth Radio Supply Company in New Shrewsbury, New Jersey. Gorbich was 30 years old at the time, and claimed to be a disabled veteran. The value of the stolen parts including boxes of television tubes was approximately $70,000, which was a lot of money in 1956. The Asbury Park Evening Press wrote: Gorbich said he sold the tubes for $30 a box, about a third of their value, said the prosecutor. He was quoted as saying he spent the money …

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Dealing with sociopaths: Fight or flight?

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Sociopaths are social predators who live their lives by exploiting people. When you're the person who has been exploited, how should you respond? Do you try to hold the sociopath accountable? Or do you cut your losses and walk away? Lovefraud is an open forum, with many people expressing opinions about what you should do. In the past, some folks have posted comments saying give up, run away, don't fight, you can't win. I don't necessarily agree with that. Yes, in some cases, fleeing is the best course of action. But sometimes the only way to survive is to fight. Or sometimes standing up to the sociopath enables you to reclaim yourself, even if you don't win the battle. I believe you …

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Talking openly about domestic violence

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Leslie Morgan Steiner wrote the book Crazy Love about being involved with a man who routinely abused her. In this TED talk from last year, she describes how she was drawn into the relationship, and why she didn't leave. Leslie Morgan Steiner: Why domestic violence victims don't leave, on Ted.com. October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.   …

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FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin on psychopathy

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In July 2012, the FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin focused on the topic of psychopathy. The publication provides an overview of  what law enforcement officials should know about psychopaths as criminals. Lovefraud readers will also find the information helpful. Topics include: Psychopathy: An important forensic concept for the 21st century Perspective: The predator when the stalker is a psychopath Looking behind the mask: Implications for interviewing psychopaths Case study: No more bagpipes the threat of the psychopath The language of psychopaths: New findings and implications for law enforcement  FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin on Psychopathy, on FBI.gov …

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People who enjoy inflicting pain and suffering

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Dr. Delroy L. Paulhus and his colleagues ran experiments to study "everyday sadists" people who enjoy inflicting pain on others. According to this article in the New York Times, "Psychopaths want to get things from people and don't care about hurting them to do so," Paulhus said. "Sadists look for opportunities to hurt people, and prolong it for their own pleasure." 'Everyday sadists' among us, on NYTimes.com.   …

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