By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) One of the things I studied in school was the findings of researchers on the effects of stress in our lives. Two researchers who have become the “gold standard” with their attempts to quantify stress and some of the effects on our lives (sickness and accidents) are Holmes and Rahe, who developed the Holmes and Rahe stress scale. According to Wikipedia: In 1967, psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe examined the medical records of over 5,000 medical patients as a way to determine whether stressful events might cause illnesses. Patients were asked to tally a list of 43 life events based on a relative score. A positive correlation of 0.118 was found b …
Bringing up our children, the hope of the world
Editor's note: Lovefraud honors and respects all spiritual traditions. This article refers to teachings of Christianity. By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) Recently there have been horrible and depressing videos and news stories about parents who are “supposedly” upright citizens but are abusers of their children. Even a professional person like Judge William Adams was seen on video severely beating and cursing his 16-year-old daughter. In addition, there have been in my own acquaintance a minister with children who was caught in a pedophile pornographic sting by the police as he was sending pictures of his “junk” to what he thought was a 14-year-old girl, who thank goodness, was a 40-year …
Steve Jobs – a remarkable man taken down and his life cut short by a “psychopath”
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) I was reading an article about Steve Jobs' new biography that came out this past week, and some of the stories about his life. There is no doubt in my mind that Steve Jobs was one of the smartest and most savvy guys in the Twentieth Century. The inventions that he fostered or personally thought of have changed our society and our culture, and remarkably changed the communication field. An amazing man! You may have read the title of this article and are already wondering how Steve Jobs was killed by a “psychopath.” Jobs died of the terminal stages of pancreatic cancer. He was diagnosed with this very serious form of cancer. Apparently, according to what …
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Appeasement–an impossible goal with psychopaths
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) The term appeasement is commonly understood to refer to a diplomatic policy aimed at avoiding war by making concessions to another power. Historian Paul Kennedy defines it as "the policy of settling international quarrels by admitting and satisfying grievances through rational negotiation and compromise, thereby avoiding the resort to an armed conflict which would be expensive, bloody, and possibly dangerous”¦ The word "appeasement" has been used as a synonym for weakness and even cowardice since the 1930s, and it is still used in that sense to denounce policies and behaviors that conflict with firm, often armed, action in international relations. From W …
We can’t change them … so we must change ourselves
By Joyce Alexander RNP (Retired) We must never forget that we may also find meaning in life even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed. For what then matters is to bear witness to the uniquely human potential at its best, which is to transform a personal tragedy into a triumph, to turn one's predicament into a human achievement. When we are no longer able to change a situation just think of an incurable disease such as inoperable cancer we are challenged to change ourselves. Dr. Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning I spent so much of my life trying to change others that it almost became a way of life for me. I was never very successful …
Where there is life, there is hope … or is there?
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) One of the things I was raised to believe was, “where there is life, there is hope.” It was one of the precepts I was taught to believe to always keep “hope” alive. In the last few decades, there have been many advances in the medical profession's ability to save people that not long ago have surely would have died. My grandfather was one of the early members of my family who was “saved” from a sure death from pneumonia by the first “sulfa drugs,” antibiotics. It was a miracle, as he was already thought by the doctors to be “sure to die,” but he returned from the very brink of death and survived. With cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) and advanced …
When our strengths become our downfall
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) I've been reading some interesting books lately by some very interesting researchers in the field of psychology—Dr. Barbara Oakley dealing with the themes of altruism, Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen on empathy, and others who are trying to discover what makes people altruistic and how empathy (or lack of it) affects how we behave toward our fellow men. I've come to some interesting conclusions concerning my own part in my abuse by multiple people who were/are high in psychopathic traits, and very low in empathy, compassion and altruistic behavior. I have wondered about my own ability to repeatedly “explain away” the abusive behavior that I experienced from family m …
BOOK REVIEW: The Science of Evil
Reviewed by Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) Simon Baron-Cohen, author of The Science of Evil: On Empathy and the Origins of Cruelty, is a professor of Developmental Psychology in the department of Experimental psychology and psychiatry at the University of Cambridge. He is director of the University's Autism Research Center and has endless awards for his research and writing. If you only read one book about empathy, this book should be it! Baron-Cohen explores the definition of empathy, or the lack of it, in humans, to answer his own questions about the Nazi atrocities in Germany before and during World War II. He also, as a scientist, wanted to explore why some people treat other as …
Book Review: The Psychopath Test
Reviewed by Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) I bought The Psychopath Test—A Journey Through the Madness Industry, by John Ronson, based mainly on the title. Jon Ronson is a journalist and author of two previous books that were widely accepted. A movie was made about one of them, The Men Who Stare at Goats, starring George Clooney. The first couple of chapters of this book weren't all that interesting to me, but before long I was hooked into the story he was writing. Mr. Ronson looks at the “madness industry” from an outsider's point of view. He actually took training from Dr. Robert “Bob” Hare in how to use the Psychopathic Check List-Revised to spot a psychopath. Ronson went a few steps …
What are worthless and wicked people like? A Biblical description of the psychopath
Editor's note: Although this post describes the Judeo-Christian scripture, Lovefraud respects and honors all religious and spiritual traditions. By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) One of my favorite books of the Bible is Proverbs, which was attributed to Solomon, King of Israel, the son of King David. Though reputedly the wisest man in the world, Solomon didn't always put his philosophies and wisdom to good use in his own life. Nonetheless, the book does have a lot of wisdom in it, including this description of a psychopath. Proverbs 6:12-19, I think, is a perfect description of the psychopath. The New Living Bible translation: 12 What are worthless and wicked people like? They …
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