How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Addicted to my relationship with a sociopath

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Editor's Note: The letter to Lovefraud was submitted by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Gwenda." My name is Gwenda and I am 27 years old. I'd like to share my story with you in hopes of getting some advice, help, or possibly sharing my story with someone going through this that could possible help them and they can relate to. Last year I started dating a guy who I believed to be the man of my dreams to discover I was dating a demon sociopath. When I met him he seemed like the most normal guy, told me he was in construction, going back to school to become a helicopter pilot, had lived in so many parts of the world, was so cultured, and extremely good looking and charming. He really made …

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George Ferguson, a man of many cons, feted in death

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Editor's Note: This story was submitted by Lovefraud reader "one/joy_step _at_a_time." I have an attraction to people who 'say it like it is', and for doing the same myself. Which is something that I had to learn to rein in and use strategically when dealing with the spath. Despite the carnage of my experience with her and other narcs and spaths, this has been the singularly important tool that I have developed: I keep my thoughts and ideas to myself when I smell real danger. And now, I am going to celebrate letting it all hang out. This obituary, penned was the deceased's daughter,  was published in the Victoria Times Colonist newspaper in British Colombia, Canada. FERGUSON, …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My experiences as a private-duty caretaker of a disabled sociopath

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Editor's Note: This letter to Lovefraud was submitted by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call “Garth.” I've been in the medical field since 1984. I've been a Nurses Aid/private-duty caretaker for a disabled patient since 2009. It took me three years to realize exhibits all the traits of being a sociopath. I came across your site and plan to get your book.  Your site and short videos really helped me see him for who he is. I am still with him but I am no longer stressed about it. I stay my distance and only care for him in short periods through the day. I don't know how his wife has dealt with him so long. I feel suckered that my patient seduced me into his illness and plays these emot …

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Why I Wrote ‘Discarded: One Mother’s Journey with a Psychopath’

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By Indie Mom I never started out to write a book, let alone a personal memoir, laying bare the most intimate and personal details between my husband and me and our children. Looking back four years since he left our family home, I can barely believe the repressed stories that have surfaced, and even more, stories that make complete sense to someone other than me. Because I had endured years of gas lighting, projection, triangulation and manipulation at the hands of my husband and father of my children, I looked and felt like a very unwell person when I tried to share anything with our closest friends and family members. Eventually, when our house of cards came tumbling down, there …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Can you count the love bombing red flags?

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Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by reader whom we'll call “ProudMom.” This was a text conversation between my 19 yr old daughter and a guy she'd only known at work for like 2 weeks. He's already gotten her flowers, a wallet from her favorite superhero and it contained a special $2.00 bill inside of it. She saw the red flags but after making up excuses 3x previously, she was kind of worn down and was going to just humor him with one date so there wouldn't be gossip. She only saw the red flags because her sociopath father tried to kill both of us and we took classes. The creeper reminded her of her father, who was also pushy and also always carried the coveted $2.00 bi …

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Mischele Lewis receives ‘Nicole’s Law’ restraining order against William Allen Jordan

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Editor's note: Joyce M. Short is the author of “Carnal Abuse by Deceit How a Predator's Lies Became Rape.” Our Unity Has the Power to Make a Radical Change By Joyce Short Although Judge John Tomasello flatly refused to issue a restraining order to protect Mischele Lewis, a victim of sexual assault by coercion, his absurd, misogynist decision was rendered to the trash heap where it belonged. As a result of the media exposure on the issue, through this blog and additional coverage, I was contacted by Michelle Noberto, the outraged mom of a prior sexual assault victim.  ”Nicoles Law,” named for her daughter, which makes restraining orders automatic in sexual assault cases, had been gross …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My sociopathic ex left me with only a bare grasp on reality

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Editor's Note: This letter was submitted to Lovefraud by a reader whom we'll call “Dolina.” The best way to deal with a sociopath is to avoid them altogether but that isn't always possible and of course, you have to realise that is what he is before he takes your brain and turns it into a bouncy-ball. And that they're not really as fun as the TV makes them look. It might be you. It could be even now, you realise something is horribly wrong with your relationship but you can't exactly think what it is. That even though he never outright says anything concrete, he has a way of showing you how useless, helpless, stupid and ugly you are. You're lucky to have him, he knows that and makes sure th …

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Why I wrote ‘The Muslim Romance Trilogy’

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 By Juliet Montague Parts one and two of Juliet Montague's Muslim love story trilogy. Part One: THE YEAR I LEARNED TO TEXT — Why Am I Having Sex with a Muslim in My Basement? Part Two: JIHAD HONEYMOON IN HOLLYWOOD — Not Without My Dogs I had not before kept a detailed diary. Looking back at previous journals, one would simply find a note here and there reflecting a doctor's appointment, a luncheon date, an audition, a listing appointment, a reminder to call my mother. My realization that I was into something profoundly foreign, intriguing, and sexually awakening, I began documenting each and every phone call, text message, and encounter with my own personal Aladdin. I had truly nev …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Life with a sociopath ends in death

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Editor's note: Following is sad news from the Lovefraud reader "Hoping to Heal." Several years ago, I was introduced to a young vivacious couple. Both were very attractive and successful. They were charming and fun to be around. Both had lots of energy and seemed to be enjoying life to its fullest. They seemed to adore one another. While I'd never met the man before, he did have a reputation of being a real Ladies Man. He had been married before and had many relationships that he left abruptly. But, he had it All ”¦ good looks, charisma and a good job, and women were beating his door down. At the time I met this couple, I assumed he had "grown up" and gotten his act together. They looked …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: How can I help my sister?

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Editor's Note: This letter was submitted  by Lovefraud reader we'll call "Elizabella." Other names in this letter have been changed. I've spent hours online searching for specific suggestions that apply to this particular situation, but am still mostly at a loss regarding how to handle it and am desperate for help. I'll try to be as succinct as possible, but there is so much to this story. I left an emotionally abusive marriage after 20 years, so I'm very familiar with how these "relationships" work and I am now convinced that my sister, Lisa, is in such a marriage, although she refuses to admit it; she has only hinted at it in the past. She has been married to him (I'll call him Ralph) …

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