How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Pro-arrest policies for domestic violence show women arrests growing

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When it comes to domestic violence, the traditional scenario has been of men abusing and beating women. At the Gainesville Police Department in Alachua County, Florida, arrests of women on domestic battery or assault charges have sometimes outpaced the arrests of men. Bruce Ferris, a former Gainesville police detective who investigated domestic violence cases, said many women charged with domestic violence are themselves victims of batterers and are defending themselves or striking out against repeated abuse. Many states have a mandatory pro-arrest policy, where if police are dispatched to a domestic violence call, the aggressor must be arrested. For officers answering a call, it is …

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Why I Wrote ‘Discarded: One Mother’s Journey with a Psychopath’

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By Indie Mom I never started out to write a book, let alone a personal memoir, laying bare the most intimate and personal details between my husband and me and our children. Looking back four years since he left our family home, I can barely believe the repressed stories that have surfaced, and even more, stories that make complete sense to someone other than me. Because I had endured years of gas lighting, projection, triangulation and manipulation at the hands of my husband and father of my children, I looked and felt like a very unwell person when I tried to share anything with our closest friends and family members. Eventually, when our house of cards came tumbling down, there …

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Psychopathy experts discuss the role media plays in mass shootings

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Dr. Richard A. Friedman, Professor of Clinical Psychiatry and Director of the Psychopharmacology Clinic at Weill Cornell Medical College, recently published an Op-Ed piece in the New York Times addressing the recent spate of mass shootings: Why Can't Doctors Identify Killers? Mary Ellen O'Toole, Editor in Chief of Violence and Gender Journal, psychopathy researcher, and Senior FBI Profiler, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Ret.), posted this response to Friedman in the Violence and Gender Journal: A Different Perspective on the UCSB Mass Murderer And Jacqueline B. Helfgott, Ph.D., author of Criminal Behavior: Theories, Typologies, and Criminal Justice, expressed her opinions on C …

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Women create educational video on sociopathy

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[youtube_sc url=http://youtu.be/S82-H6qGXwU] Jade Joddle, and her business partner, Charlotte, create animated videos that offer information on love, relationships and personality disorders. One of the videos that content manager, Jade, and illustrator, Charlotte, collaborated on  may be of interest to Lovefraud readers: Sociopath Quiz: Have you fallen in love with a sociopath? Link supplied by Lovefraud reader. …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Can you count the love bombing red flags?

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Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by reader whom we'll call “ProudMom.” This was a text conversation between my 19 yr old daughter and a guy she'd only known at work for like 2 weeks. He's already gotten her flowers, a wallet from her favorite superhero and it contained a special $2.00 bill inside of it. She saw the red flags but after making up excuses 3x previously, she was kind of worn down and was going to just humor him with one date so there wouldn't be gossip. She only saw the red flags because her sociopath father tried to kill both of us and we took classes. The creeper reminded her of her father, who was also pushy and also always carried the coveted $2.00 bi …

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Mischele Lewis receives ‘Nicole’s Law’ restraining order against William Allen Jordan

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Editor's note: Joyce M. Short is the author of “Carnal Abuse by Deceit How a Predator's Lies Became Rape.” Our Unity Has the Power to Make a Radical Change By Joyce Short Although Judge John Tomasello flatly refused to issue a restraining order to protect Mischele Lewis, a victim of sexual assault by coercion, his absurd, misogynist decision was rendered to the trash heap where it belonged. As a result of the media exposure on the issue, through this blog and additional coverage, I was contacted by Michelle Noberto, the outraged mom of a prior sexual assault victim.  ”Nicoles Law,” named for her daughter, which makes restraining orders automatic in sexual assault cases, had been gross …

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BOOK REVIEW: The Sociopath at the Breakfast Table

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I recently received a review copy of The Sociopath at the Breakfast Table Recognizing and dealing with antisocial and manipulative people. The book was written by Dr. Jane McGregor, a lecturer at Nottingham University Institute of Mental Health, and Tim McGregor, a consultant, writer and mental health practitioner. This is a slender volume, only 111 pages, plus appendix, index and resource listing. It provides a good overview of the sociopathic disorder, how sociopaths affect their targets, and what targets can do to recover. However, if you're looking for a thorough discussion of these topics, you'll need to augment your reading with other sources. The sociopathic transaction One of …

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Why we need to talk about our experiences with sociopaths

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Most of us at Lovefraud are here because we've been conned, duped, deceived and betrayed by a sociopath. Once we finally figure out what we are dealing with, many of us do not tell other people what really happened. We do not talk about our experiences with sociopaths. After all, it's embarrassing to admit that no, we didn't see it coming, and yes, we fell for the scam. And if we do venture to describe the sociopath's true behavior, we may be met by disbelief. "What? That charming person couldn't possibly have done that. You must have misinterpreted." We quickly learn that people do not understand what we are talking about. Either they don't believe us, or ostracize us. So we stop …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My sociopathic ex left me with only a bare grasp on reality

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Editor's Note: This letter was submitted to Lovefraud by a reader whom we'll call “Dolina.” The best way to deal with a sociopath is to avoid them altogether but that isn't always possible and of course, you have to realise that is what he is before he takes your brain and turns it into a bouncy-ball. And that they're not really as fun as the TV makes them look. It might be you. It could be even now, you realise something is horribly wrong with your relationship but you can't exactly think what it is. That even though he never outright says anything concrete, he has a way of showing you how useless, helpless, stupid and ugly you are. You're lucky to have him, he knows that and makes sure th …

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Devaluation and the Inability to Form Emotional Attachments

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I'd like to start this post with a passage from the author Jesmyn Ward in Men We Reaped. Here, she talks about how she learned to undervalue herself when her dad left their family: "I looked at myself and saw a walking embodiment of everything the world around me seemed to despise: an unattractive, poor, Black woman. Undervalued by her family, a perpetual workhouse. Undervalued by society regarding her labor and her beauty. This seed buried itself in my stomach and bore fruit. I hated myself. That seed bloomed in the way I walked, slumped over, eyes on the floor, in the way I didn't even attempt to dress well, in the way I avoided the world, when I could, through reading, and in the way I …

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