How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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This sociopathic girl hacked me and put spyware on my phone

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a woman who posts as "rabb1t." Names are changed. Few years ago I met a girl on FB called Catherine. It was a random add and we liked each others stuff but didn’t really talk for a a few months until May 2016. This girl saw, as she was on my friends list, that I was at a vulnerable time in my life. I had just come out of a bad relationship and I also found out that someone who I thought was my best friend was stealing from me. I expressed my frustration on FB and this Catherine must have seen it as an opportunity to psychologically and emotionally abuse me. Over the days we got talking and she started to send me voice notes and …

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What to do with your anger at the sociopath

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When I finally realized that my husband, James Montgomery, had lied to me, cheated on me, and targeted me just to take my money, I was angry. Furious. Outraged. With each lie I discovered, my internal upheaval grew. Yes, he was cheating with multiple women, and taking money from them as well. No, he was not a Hollywood screenwriter, although he pretended to be. No, he had never served in the Australian military, even though he claimed to have won its highest honor. I felt the anger deep within me. I had a hard time concentrating on what I needed to do to extricate myself from the mess. I couldn't sleep. Perhaps you know what I mean. Anger management Dealing with anger was …

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Two Australian ‘black widows’ convinced men to commit murder

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Yes, women can be psychopaths. The Daily Mail just published an article about two women from Australia — Michelle Burgess and Melissa Shaw — who exerted such mind control over their male lovers that the men were willing to do anything for them — including commit murder. Michelle Burgess of Adelaide promised her lover, Kevin Matthews, that she would kill his wife so they could be together. Then Burgess convinced another of her lovers, David Key, to actually do the deed. He did, and was caught. Burgess, Matthews and Key were all convicted. Once in prison, Burgess attempted to seduce multiple male prison guards. The prison had to establish a policy that male guards could not be alone with …

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My husband’s sociopathic ex-wife: theft, fraud, embezzlement and child abandonment

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Editor's note: The following story was submitted by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call Kimberly19. Names have been changed. I am married to Tom, Barbara's ex-husband and prime victim, and am raising her children, as we were finally successful in gaining sole custody with only very limited, supervised visits granted once a month. I have been served with a TRO (retalliation to pulling off her mask), slandered and subjected to hateful and manipulative comments. This, however, is nothing compared to all that she's done to my husband and the kids, as well as numerous employers. When everything 'blew up', it came to light that there was a massive fiduciary breach and they were days from …

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10 Lessons on divorcing a sociopath that I learned the hard way

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Throughout my marriage to the sociopath, James Montgomery, I was confused. He kept telling me that he loved me, but he went through all my money, put me in debt, and didn't care that I was upset about it. What kind of marriage was that? When I finally discovered that Montgomery was cheating on me, in fact, that he had a child with another woman during our marriage, my first reaction was relief. Now I could leave. I wanted this man out of my life as soon as possible, which meant I needed a divorce. Here's what I learned about divorcing a sociopath. When divorcing a sociopath, you need a good attorney The first attorney I consulted, who was suggested by a friend, was awful. I …

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Shrink Next Door: Like a cult leader, psychiatrist takes over his patient’s life

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Joe Nocera, a seasoned business journalist, bought a house in Southampton, New York, in 2010. He thought his next door neighbor was a psychiatrist from New York, Dr. Isaac "Ike" Herschkopf. Another man, Marty Markowitz, who lived in the house, seemed to be a caretaker. Except that Marty Markowitz actually owned the house, and for nearly 30 years, the psychiatrist had taken over his life. Herschkopf separated Markowitz from his family. Herschkopf became the co-signer on his patient's million-dollar Swiss bank account. The psychiatrist threw lavish, star-studded parties in Markowitz' home, with the owner acting like a waiter, pouring drinks and cleaning up after the guests. Nocera …

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Facebook made a video of me without my permission

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Today I received an alert on my iPad from Facebook. It said, Donna, we made a video of you and your friends. Huh? So I click the link, and there's another message: The Moments That Bring Us Closer Donna, today we're celebrating the everyday things that bring friends like yours together. We hope you enjoy your video! Beneath this is a video of some random people whom I definitely do not know building some fabric contraption that I couldn't identify. Superimposed on this are my Facebook photos, displaying one after the other. Then another random video of people I don't know. When I finally found the sound button, there was music I never heard of playing throughout the video. I was …

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How my sociopath ex-husband used lies and CPS to take my kids away

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call, "Andrea19." Names are changed. I separated from my ex husband/sociopath in May of 2014. He lied in court under oath in on February 2015 and I had full custody of both kids for 8 months. We divorced in July 2015. October 2015 we had joint custody of both kids. Then my ex had both of my kids for three weeks in a row to take them on a cruise. I had a bad feeling with him having them for an extended period and I was right. He used the time to coach my daughter to say my boyfriend at the time had inappropriately touched her. On the day my daughter went to an unscheduled counselor …

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10 mistakes to avoid when leaving a sociopath

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Ending a relationship with a sociopath is not a normal break-up. Sociopaths (people who could be diagnosed with antisocial, narcissistic, borderline, histrionic or psychopathic personality disorders) do not pursue romantic relationships in search of mutual love and companionship. They are looking for someone to use in some way — such as for money, sex, or to siphon off your emotional energy. Therefore, when you end a relationship with a sociopath, you can't get together, hug, cry and wish each other well, as you might with a normal person. When leaving a sociopath, you need to be strategic. Here are 10 mistakes to avoid: Thinking you can still be friends You may still be …

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Stalking, burglary, identity theft — all by one criminal

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Most criminals specialize. They're drug runners, or they're car thieves, or they're credit card fraudsters, etc. One of the indicators of a psychopath, however, is "criminal versatility." That means psychopaths engage in all kinds of crime. A Lovefraud reader sent me a story, and "criminal versatility" seems to apply. Christopher Endicott, of Dakota County,  Minnesota, was sentenced last week for stalking, burglary and identity theft. According to KARE11 in Minnesota, Endicott said in court, "I don't pretend that what I did makes sense, even to me. There is no excuse for my actions." Here's what Endicott, a former principal, did, according to KARE11: Broke into his neighbors' …

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