How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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5 steps to recovery from the sociopath (they’re not fast or easy, but the healing is real)

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Finally, you realize what is wrong with your romantic partner: He or she is a sociopath. Finally, the behavior that was so confusing makes sense. The person you loved, and who you thought loved you, has a personality disorder. Now you realize that anything your partner told you could have been a lie. Now you know why your partner could be so cruel, then tell you how much he or she loved you, practically in the same breath. Now you realize that there never was any love, that your entire relationship was exploitation, and nothing more. Now what do you do? How do you move forward? How do you recover? Many of your friends and family tell you, "Just put it behind you. Get over it. Move …

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Why I wrote, Narcissists, SOCIOPATHS & Wolves: Lessons From Little Red Riding Hood

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Many of you know me from my book, Husband, Liar, Sociopath:  How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned. Through writing the book and including chapters on Lovefraud, I’ve tried to share the insights I paid such a high price to obtain. For almost twenty years, I was married to someone I now believe is a sociopath. My corrosive, confusing marriage, the toxic divorce, and the ongoing, financially and emotionally punitive post-divorce aftershocks redefined my life in ways I never imagined. I had to understand how my life got so derailed, how my confidence was decimated, and how my identity was almost destroyed. Through my book, I wanted to share what I’d learned in case it …

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My experience with my narc ex boyfriend

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Left my ex since almost 4 years now, the hell I went through with him, it's a miracle I'm still here. Even though I've left he still pops up here and there doing the hoovering manuever, which is well known for borderline narcs. He would use the silent treatment on me and it drove me crazy as at that time. I had no idea about the narcissistic personality disorder one can have. I was pregnant with his child, I left my country to live with him in his country. He promised he love and all the wonderful things in life and always used to coo about how he would like to see me pregnant with a baby bump and all, so when it finally happened he blackmailed me into getting an abortion. He literally …

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5 steps to avoid being taken in a romance scam — beware of fake documentation

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Fake documentation is easy to create, and romance scammers know it. I recently received the following email from a reader in Denmark whom we'll call "Grete": In december 2015 i got to know an engineer from New Jersey. He claimed he was from New Jersey. He got a contract from Shell. The job was in Ukraine. We spoke on the phone every day. He made me believe I was the one. I trusted him. When he arrived in Ukraine, his problems started. He said that his credit card didn’t work. His bank accountant send me a collateral letter. I sent the letter to my bank. They thought it was an original. Unfortunately it wasn’t. I have given him 17.500$ I contacted FBI fraud center and sent them a …

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The sociopath is a neighbor of a family member!! Ugh!!!!

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First, I would like to say how beneficial reading the Lovefraud site has been. It has really pulled me through some rough moments of dealing with the sociopath that I was romantically linked to. He and I were in a LDR relationship (or so I thought) for a year and a half. I knew something was off right away, but I thought it was fear of commitment on his part or depression. He did all of the textbook things a sociopath would do (before I knew what one was.) He blew hot and cold, would ignore me for weeks, try to make me jealous, disappear on special days even when I was in town, and so much more.The final straw was him ignoring me when I was in town and then basically inviting me over for a …

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Be careful–sociopaths think boundaries and laws don’t apply to them

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Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.   I've also just released a new ebook titled Narcissists, SOCIOPATHS & Wolves: Lessons From Little Red Riding Hood. (Just click here to find it on Amazon.com Narcissists SOCIOPATHS & Wolves.) Chapter 51E:  The Earthquake Strikes Jessica was spending a lot of time at Paul’s but had not officially moved in with him and Linda. One day, prior to Paul and I going to court for the first time …

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When am I going to stop being angry?

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By Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, CHT After being in a relationship with a sociopath, clients are often conflicted by the idea of forgiveness as recommended by their faith system (I checked and all the world’s major religions admonish to forgive) as opposed to the perpetual anger they feel. As therapists, we never pressure someone who has been abused to forgive their perpetrator, because we don’t want to minimize the impact of that abuse. While someone is moving through the emotions of healing from abuse and trauma, they are going to experience quite a bit of anger, even rage, which can hang around for a long time. Is there such a thing as having too much anger? So when and how do we know how to get …

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The Swinging Female Psychopath And The Partner Left Behind: When The Fog Lifts

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Well it has  been 7 months since our two an a half year "relationship" ended and I am still picking up the pieces. I never ever could have imagined the rabbit hole I'd fallen into. The things I now know have shocked and altered me to the core of my very being. It has been like unraveling the giant web of a black widow, one silky strand at a time. When I met her I thought I had found love at first sight. The connection seemed electric, she was in my estimation perfect. My patchwork princess. We were engaged  within six months and three months before we broke up we actually took a marriage covenant together. Well I took the covenant, she used it to gain more dominance and control o …

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Will the sociopath treat the next wife better?

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Lovefraud received the following email from a reader: I always knew there was something wrong with my ex-husband, and friends and family did as well. There were lies, gambling, cheating, drug use, rehab 3 times, head games. He would drive erratically with our son and I in the car (even when our son was very little). He would speed up if there was a cat or other animal in the road. I would always completely freak out so he never ran one over when I was in the car, but I wouldn't be surprised if he did when I wasn't. (I could tell his counselor in rehab #3 knew there was more to his problems than just drug addiction.) He was clean for a long time and that's when I realized it wasn't the drugs …

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Ironically, a sociopath’s previous weak relationship with a child gives the sociopath great power over that child–I’ll love you now if . . .

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Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 51D:  The Earthquake Strikes Daniel was crushed by his father’s choices—his betrayal of our family, his instant girlfriend, the disrespectful way Daniel had learned that Linda even existed and was moving in, the kidnapping of Ella, the mounting lies, and his father’s attempt to keep him from participating in karate. Although I needed every bit of money I had, I promised Daniel that he c …

Ironically, a sociopath’s previous weak relationship with a child gives the sociopath great power over that child–I’ll love you now if . . .Read More