Three former administration officials of Penn State University were sentenced to jail last Friday because they failed to report signs that Jerry Sandusky, the former assistant football coach, was sexually abusing boys. This is right and just. They should be held accountable. The former university president, Graham B. Spanier, will spend at least two months in jail, followed by two months of house arrest. Gary Schultz, the former athletic director, and Tim Curley, a former vice president, will also spend time in jail, followed by house arrest. On October 9, 2012, Sandusky was sentenced to 30 to 60 years in prison for assaulting 10 boys. However, more men also came forward, and Penn …
Despite the ocean between us, he controlled my every move
Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Larissa." I met him while I was traveling through India. We crossed paths twice within an hour and chatted at the seaside cafe where I had ordered a meal. He was very attractive, striking even - but I was not at all consciously interested in a romance with this guy. I had encountered quite a lot of lechery as a woman traveling alone, although he seemed different. Gentle. Interesting. He seemed very savvy and initially, even slightly aloof to the point of seeming guarded around me. Polar opposite to what I had been experiencing! He asked what my plans were and from that point, to cut a very long story short, he hijacked …
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Understanding someone is a sociopath brings clarity
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 45D: Whack-A-Mole Returns The next morning, I wrote furiously in a journal that I had started to keep only recently at the recommendation of a friend. More pieces of the puzzle fell into place, my hand barely able to keep pace with my thoughts. What kind of person would manipulate his spouse as Paul had done over the past two years and probably even before that, perhaps even from t …
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The Marriage Masks: Three types of sociopathic relationships
Here at Lovefraud, we've heard thousands of horror stories of marriages to sociopaths. Thinking about these unfortunate involvements, it seems to me that there are three types of romantic relationships with sociopaths. I call them the Marriage Masks, and they are: 1. Calculated exploitation The sociopath targets an individual for the explicit purpose of exploiting him or her, using the unsuspecting partner for money, sex, a place to live or something else that the sociopath wants. My ex-husband, James Montgomery, targeted me because I had what he wanted: money, good credit, my own home and business connections in the city where he decided he was going to make a fortune. He sweet …
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He lied up until the last minute of our relationship
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Claudette." Met online. He was a perfect gentleman. We had several dates until he started talking about mind, body and spirit (which meant sex to him) and I mentioned I do not have sex just to be having sex. That night he says let's be boyfriend and girlfriend. So we did become BF and GF. I assumed (stupid me) that he would take his dating profile down since now in a committed relationship. I took mine down and never looked again, until one day my GF called me and told me that she was just matched (online dating site) with him. AND that he was currently online searching. Of, course I called him …
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Senior Sociopath survey closing soon
There's a rumor floating around in mental health circles that sociopaths "burn out" with age, that they engage in less antisocial behavior as they get older. Is this true? Lovefraud wants to find out. So we've developed a survey to gather data from you. Were you involved with a sociopath while he or she was over age 50? The individual could have been any of the following: Your spouse or ex-spouse Your romantic partner Your parent Your stepparent Your child Your stepchild Your sibling Another family member A work colleague A business associate A friend, neighbor or acquaintance If you are familiar with how this individual behaved while over the age of 50, please …
The realization that someone you thought you knew and loved is a sociopath is brutal
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 45C: Whack-A-Mole Returns The only topics Paul broached repeatedly were his company and our finances. Magically, as soon as we rang in the New Year, only six months after being assured of the financial success and viability of his company that would allow for this move and enable trips back East to see my aging parents multiple times a year—not to mention rebuilding our depleted ass …
The realization that someone you thought you knew and loved is a sociopath is brutalRead More
The Atlantic publishes: ‘When Your Child Is a Psychopath’
When Samantha was six years old, she tried to choke her two-year-old sister as they sat in the back seat of their mother's car. After mom separated them, Samantha said she wanted to kill everyone in the family. The anecdote starts an article in the June issue of The Atlantic, When Your Child Is a Psychopath. The author, Barbara Bradley Hagerty, writes that Samantha was diagnosed with conduct disorder with callous and unemotional traits. She has the traits of a budding psychopath. Hagerty spoke to many of the leading experts on psychopathy and how it develops for this article. It's a good explanation of the state of the science. The article also describes a treatment program for ad …
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With a sociopath, when “no contact” isn’t possible, try the “grey rock method”
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 45B: Whack-A-Mole Returns In retrospect, I wish I had had the energy and foresight to move back East immediately, but I was too tired and too ashamed that I had made such a disruptive change in my life, maybe for nothing. Also, both kids seemed to be enjoying life in the mountains, and I did not want to uproot them again in such a short time span. That would hardly be fair to them. …
With a sociopath, when “no contact” isn’t possible, try the “grey rock method”Read More
How disordered parents set children up to be exploited by psychopaths
Book Review: A History of a Pedophile's Wife — Memoir of a Canadian Teacher and Writer, by Eleanor Cowan Review by Donna Andersen People born to disordered parents are likely to be vulnerable to psychopaths later in life. I've explained this to many, many people that I've spoken to in my personal consultations. Eleanor Cowan's book, A History of a Pedophile's Wife, explains exactly how it happens. Childhood without love Eleanor was born in 1948 outside of Montreal, Canada, the second child in what would become a large Catholic family. Her childhood was molded by the dictates of the Catholic Church, wholeheartedly accepted by her father, and the disinterest of a personality d …
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