Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 35B: The Weeds Always Win Consistent with sociopath math, Paul's refusal to help knew no bounds. One Sunday, I went down to our basement to do laundry, only to discover two inches of water on the floor. The water heater had broken and flooded our basement with over sixty gallons of water. Grumbling about being distracted from watching a football game, Paul sized up the s …
If our emotions are triggered, there’s more pain to process
Lovefraud recently received the following e-mail from a reader—we'll call her Sally: It's been almost four years since I left my ex psychopath. He almost had me take my own life through guilt, when it was him lying, cheating, committing fraud, you name it—a textbook case. The reason I write to you today, however, is I am so sad and disappointed in myself yet again. Four years and I thought I was over the damage done by the psychopath so I stepped out of my comfort zone to contact an old friend I had not seen since before the psychopath came into my life. I made a decision to visit my male friend and we had a nice time. When I returned I started analysing the situation. Was my friend ju …
If our emotions are triggered, there’s more pain to processRead More
Kelly Cochran, possible serial killer, awaits trial in Michigan
Kelly Cochran, of Caspian, Michigan, began an affair with a co-worker, Chris Regan. But when Kelly's husband, Jason Cochran, found out, he was furious, and threatened to kill Regan. Instead, the Cochrans allegedly hatched a plot to kill Regan together. Then they dismembered his body. But Kelly Cochran was angry, and 16 months later, she allegedly killed her husband, making the death look like a heroin overdose. Kelly told a police detective that she wouldn't lose sleep over her husband's death. "You feel (emotion)," she said, according to DetroitNews.com, "and I can't." Killings may go beyond U.P. woman's husband, lover, on DetroitNews.com. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader. …
Kelly Cochran, possible serial killer, awaits trial in MichiganRead More
For the holidays, give yourself the gift of honoring your experience
How do you get through the season of joy and hope when a lying, destructive, individual has wreaked havoc in your life? First, be gentle with yourself. You are a normal, caring, person. Perhaps you wanted to love and be loved, as all normal people do. Perhaps you felt sorry for the individual and wanted to help. Your intentions were honorable, but the exploiter took advantage of your humanity. Second, honor your experience. What does that mean? It means accepting that it happened. Much of the pain and confusion of tangling with a sociopath comes from not wanting to believe that these individuals are what they are, and they do what they do. Accepting that yes, they exist, and yes, you were …
For the holidays, give yourself the gift of honoring your experienceRead More
Divorcing a Narcissist: Tina Swithin, author of OneMomsBattle.com, offers “Advice from the Battlefield”
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/8y3K9ucP99s" title="Divorcing%20a%20Narcissist:%20Tina%20Swithin%20offers%20Advice%20from%20the%20Battlefield"] If you married someone whom you now believe is a narcissist, and you are divorcing, know this: You are headed for a really rough ride, especially if you have children with this person. Tina Swithin, founder of OneMomsBattle.com and author of the Divorcing a Narcissist series, has been there. She endured her ex-husband's smear campaign, court officials who didn't understand personality disorders, and two custody evaluations. It took years, but she finally succeeded protecting her children and is living in peace. Now, she coaches men and women who …
Professor who murdered his wife asks for money to start over, but maybe he shouldn’t have
Ten years ago, on Dec. 22, 2006, Rafael Robb, of King of Prussia, Pennsylvania, bludgeoned his wife, Ellen Gregory Robb, to death as she wrapped Christmas presents. He pleaded guilty and was sentenced to 10 years in prison. Robb, a former University of Pennsylvania economics professor and an expert in game theory, was supposed to be released in January. A civil suit awarded $124.26 million to the couple's daughter, who was 12 when her mother was killed. Robb listed assets of approximately $3 million in the civil lawsuit. This week, Robb petitioned the court for $100,000 of his assets to set up a new life after prison. But in a hearing, he mentioned an account in France, which he had not di …
Professor who murdered his wife asks for money to start over, but maybe he shouldn’t haveRead More
After 10 years of abuse, New Jersey woman is found dead; police search for her husband
State Police are searching for Jeremiah Monell, 32, of Commercial Township in southern New Jersey, who allegedly killed his wife. Tara O'Shea-Watson, 35, endured 10 years of beatings and abuse, friends and relatives say in an article in the Press of Atlantic City. Monell would "freak out" on his wife if she talked to family members, the victim's friend said. Over the past few months, according to the friend, O'Shea-Watson finally decided to enforce a restraining order and filed for divorce. She was found unconscious and unresponsive in her home Monday morning. State Police continue to search woods for Commercial Township murder suspect, on PressOfAtlanticCity.com. …
After 10 years of abuse, New Jersey woman is found dead; police search for her husbandRead More
Husband takes his new wife shopping on their honeymoon, buys her expensive gifts, and then she asks for divorce
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from an American man, whom we'll call "Brad." He met a Moroccan woman who lived in the U.K. We'll call her "Fatima." Fatima and I had unforgettable memories, which would be the base of any marriage. We laughed, we joked, we traveled, we spent so much time together. I took her with me to Morocco with our group going to Casablanca because I really liked her and wanted to spend time with her. We enjoyed lots of moments together, and she helped me with business, religion, and talked about all areas of life with me. She was such a great friend ”¦ easy going, fun, down to earth ”¦ relaxed ”¦ and it seemed like she really wanted to be with me …
Steven Dean Gordon, already a sex offender, guilty of murdering 4 women while wearing a GPS tracker
Prosecutors in Orange County, California, started calling him "Jaws" because he was such a vicious predator. Last week, Steven Dean Gordon, 47, was convicted of abducting and killing four random women in Santa Ana, between 2013 and 2014. Gordon was already a convicted sex offender. His partner in crime, Franc Cano, was also a sex offender. Cano will be tried separately. Both men were under supervision after being convicted in separate cases of lewd and lascivious acts with a child under 14. Both men were wearing GPS tracking devices. In fact, it was the data from the tracking devices that connected them to the disappearances of the four women, who were all prostitutes. After …
How psychopaths use our biology against us
Invariably, once we realize we've been conned by a psychopath, this person has lied to us from the very beginning, and we fell for all of it, we ask why? Why did we believe? Why did we trust? The short answer is that we did what we, as social animals, are biologically designed to do. Human beings have evolved over millennia to live in community, and trust is the glue that holds us together. I read The Moral Molecule the source of love and prosperity, by Paul J. Zak. Zak spent 10 years researching a brain chemical called oxytocin and its role in human behavior. He says oxytocin inspires trust; trust is connected to morality; and morality is connected to the survival of the human …