Editor's note: The following article, written by Laura Johnson, is reproduced from SmartDivorce.com. It offers tips that may help people who are divorcing a sociopath. Even though your state may be a no-fault divorce state, it doesn't mean that you or your spouse won't have to answer in some way for any misbehavior during the marriage. It's what divorce lawyers and courts refer to as marital misconduct and, in certain states, can affect the outcome of the division of property, an award of spousal support, or an award of attorney's fees for the victim-spouse. The legal definition of marital misconduct is any conduct that undermines the marital relationship. It becomes a …
Judge orders woman arrested for blog exposing ex-husband’s military fraud
Lovefraud has written extensively about Phil Haberman and the efforts of his ex-wife to expose his military fraud and crimes. Last week, his ex-wife was charged with contempt of court by a Florida judge for refusing to take down her blog. A warrant was issued for her arrest. Haberman had previously accused his ex-wife, of California, of domestic violence and cyberstalking because of her blog. On September 7, 2006, Judge Robert B. Bennett Jr., of the 12th Judicial Circuit for Sarasota County, Florida, ordered her to “remove or cause to be removed all blogs, e-mails or other web-based communications” about Haberman. The woman, believing her First Amendment rights were violated, has not com …
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Child victims of sociopathic parents
The benefits of a relationship with both parents depend on the quality of care the parents can provide. This fact is illustrated in the following story: FREMONT, Calif. - A 6-year-old boy abducted from his mother was returned home safely Friday after his father was arrested 200 miles away in the Sacramento Valley, police said. Ralph Baldenegro, 56, was arrested near Red Bluff and was being held at the Tehama County Jail. Baldenegro allegedly broke into his estranged wife's house, beat and handcuffed her, and kidnapped the boy Thursday night, said Fremont Detective Bill Veteran. He also hit his 14-year-old stepdaughter.” Read full story. The news is full of stories like the one above t …
Children of sociopaths are twice cursed
Many have declared that the lack of a conscience is the defect that defines sociopathy. Therefore, understanding how the conscience forms will lead us to better understand this disorder. Researchers currently discuss two basic pathways to conscience formation. The first and most common path to conscience is through guilt. Conscience through guilt develops from fear of punishment. Children who are genetically at risk for sociopathy are often fearless and so have little or no guilt, as discussed last week. The second path to conscience The second path to conscience is through empathy. A fearless child can have a conscience if he develops empathy. Conscience through empathy is called the …
Judge rules for con artist and against free speech
Lovefraud has just published the most recent mind-boggling chapter of the Phil Haberman saga. Haberman, you may recall, has a tendency to exaggerate his meager military service to women he meets on the Internet, plays the wounded soldier when he suffered no injuries, and defrauds people such as his ex-wife. Haberman's story was originally published on September 1, 2005 by the Dallas Observer. It was then picked up by at least five different websites and blogs, including Lovefraud. His ex-wife launched her own blog in July, 2006. Haberman had tried to coerce and threaten the other websites into removing the information about him. No one did it. But when his ex-wife launched her blog, …
UK man says sociopath stole his life
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following e-mail from a man in the UK—we'll call him “Tom.” Tom says his wife left him to be with another man, “Peter," who Tom believes is a sociopath. Tom says he hasn't seen his children in two years, he has been arrested on false charges nine times, and his money is gone. He has asked for help to determine what to do. If you have suggestions, please post them as comments. My story is out of the movies and I have suffered so much that I no longer know what to do. I have lost my children, my home, my stability, my career and my wealth at the hands of two sociopaths. I am in recovery now, totally broke, practically homeless and mentally and emotion …
Divorce, custody and personality disorders
Lovefraud frequently receives e-mails and phone calls from people who are divorcing a sociopath and are afraid they're going to get trashed in court. They know the sociopaths will lie—smoothly and convincingly—and are terrified that the manipulator will end up winning the money, the house, and custody of the kids. If you're facing family court battles with a sociopath, I recommend that you buy and read Splitting—Protecting Yourself While Divorcing a Borderline or Narcissist, by William A. Eddy. It may be the best $25 you ever spend. Eddy, the author, is both a therapist (Licensed Clinical Social Worker) and an attorney. He understands the law, the courts and how people with personality diso …
Risking death to stand up to threats
Lovefraud.com recently heard from a woman in Illinois, who we'll call Mary. Mary is trying to protect herself and her eight-year-old daughter from her ex-boyfriend, the daughter's father, who has guns and has threatened to use them. Not only is Mary fighting the ex, but she's fighting lawyers—both hers and his—and an unresponsive family court. Mary left the ex for good in 2001, when their daughter was three. The guy has an alcohol problem and a 20-year arrest record. He has five arrests for DUI (driving under the influence of alcohol) and 14 DWLR arrests (driving while license revoked). He has two arrests for domestic battery. Two different women have sought protection orders against him, …