Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader. Names have been changed. My name is Elisa. I was born in Central America. I lived in my native country until I was 18. I was raised by my two parents. As an adult I have identified that every male role model in my family was a narcissist, including my dad and grandparents. I went to school in Texas. I had two boyfriends prior to my college days, which by studying all the information I can diagnose them with either narcissistic tendencies or BPD. Male figures with these characteristics where what normal was for me. I didn't know better. During my freshman year I met Tom — he was my brother's roommate. I found him f …

After the sociopath, I have finally found who I was meant to beRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received this story from a European woman whom we'll call, "Johanna." I met a man in Facebook. He wasn't my friend but started to write his thoughts, which were so ideal, beautiful and intriguing. He idealized woman and described how he would spend time with woman by loving her so deeply. I analyzed his writings because I was recognizing some depression or bitterness in his writings. It was unusual writings from man. I was a specialized nurse and also specialized in depression. Man was a bit irritated when I did that and I promised not to analyze his writings any longer. He told he was working in high rank in the army. (He did.) But as the writings …

Sociopathic seduction: Three months of romance, then it falls apartRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Carolina." I am completely confused about what actually happened and what is going on. I recently broke up with my boyfriend — we have been on and off for the past 18 years — I met him when I was 10 years old. He made me think he was the perfect man. And that he was loyal honest trustworthy sincere caring my soul mate. I'm not a perfect person — I have made mistakes — but he always made me feel secure. I was really dependent on him — he was my whole world. I've always tried to self-evaluate and fix my behavior and I've always been open about talking to him about everything and anything and I thought he …

Is he a sociopath or am I the toxic person?Read More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Frederick19." When you yourself are controlled by outside forces that you yourself have allowed inside … are you still responsible? If those forces wrestle and usurp your very mind because what you thought was just innocent fun at the time, but now you have completely lost control of your spatial awareness and are now at the whims of what you have kowtowed too, are you responsible? Just because tragedy has befallen you, just because you yourself have made arguably some of the worst decisions a human being could ever make and as a result disaster has taken residence in your soul, do you think that is …

Narcissism — exploiting the tenets of love for personal gainRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Clara19."  I was contacted through Pinterest. The thumbnail picture was a military man...seemed safe enough to chat. Went very interested in a romantic relationship too quickly. I got daily texted graphics proclaiming his love for me. This started to break my caution down. After a few weeks he started mentioning he needed money. He was on an oil rig and ran short of funds to pay shipping costs and I should sent 12,800 dollars to him. He gave me 3 different places to sent money over the course of a week. My bank thought it was fraudulent. I did further online research and found the scammers had …

I was one day away from sending money to the scammerRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call, Jane19. Names have been changed. After a stroke I became increasingly isolated and lonely. I turned to online chat sites. It wasn’t long a matter of days before a guy introduced himself. Roger seemed very charming and smart and seemed to be going through a tough time divorcing. We had children of a similar age; we had much in common. He failed to disclose that his current wife wasn’t his first. After I had done a background check, when my gut told me there was something not right, I found out he had been married prior. When confronted with his lie and deceit, he gave me a long, very believable story …

The sociopath duped 9 other women like meRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader. Names are changed. "Heather," the author, says she has borderline personality disorder (BPD). People with this disorder are often manipulative and impulsive — similar to those with antisocial or narcissistic personality disorders. But unlike other sociopaths, people who have BPD suffer because of their condition. Women with BPD were often sexually abused as children. Men with BPD were often shamed as children. Lovefraud is publishing this to help readers understand the thought processes of people who self-identify as disordered. Hello, Your website is very informative and has definitely assisted me with my r …

A disordered woman explains her goalsRead More

Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call, "Tanya19." Just as Alice did, I too followed that stupid rabbit down the hole with such high hopes of finding an adventure, companionship, a better, less painful, less stressful, less depressing, less lonely life. But instead I found the most extreme mentally, physically, emotionally taxing and just down right scariest rollercoaster ride of my life, with a man who I now believe wholeheartedly is a sociopath. A man I loved wholeheartedly, who claimed that I was the love of his life, his world, queen, savior, the best thing that ever happened to him, the only person to know him and accept him. Yet he used these same …

My scary rollercoaster ride with a sociopathRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call, "Lanie19." They are all monsters. Try to put one in a box and you'll find they are as individual as we humans. It's worth the effort to educate humans but don't get so hung up on identifying them to know if the monster resembles a psycho, a sociopath, or a narcissist. What difference does it make if they kill you after they terrorize and torture you, if they beat you for years or if they lock you in an invisible cage and rip and tear and pick you apart discarding you like trash until their is nothing left of you? What difference does it make? Are we to be less guarded if an alligator is approaching us …

I lived among sociopathic monsters all my lifeRead More

Last year, I had an email exchange with a woman whom we'll call, "Amy." I sent out a newsletter that included an article about staying safe from sociopaths by listening to our intuition. Amy responded: *** Nov. 13, 2018 Hi Donna, This is so true about intuition. The biggest mistake I made was not trusting my gut feeling that there was something wrong with the man to whom I was engaged. I asked everyone, friends and family, for support and they all said i should marry him. Now I realize that the quick engagement was a trap to get me hooked and committed, to be hesitant to break it off. I see it now as a real tactic to get me hooked. Back then, it seemed like the worst thing to be …

‘Listen to your intuition,’ says a woman who didn’t, and died regretting itRead More