No contact is of the utmost importance when it comes to recovering from any unhealthy relationship. Why, then, can it be so hard to maintain? How is it that we can do so well for long stretches and then become instant Jell-O with seemingly little warning? Of the myriad of struggles we may experience during recovery, this seems to be one of the most common snags. The cold reality is that we are going through withdrawal and there is no methadone to ease the pain of this addiction. Making matters worse, each and every time we break it, the clock starts over, feeling worse than we did previously. However, from experience, I know that we do get to the point where we truly do not care to em …
My ‘knight in shining armor’ turned out to be a sociopath
Editor's note: The following was written by "Cajungirl." I found my "knight in shining armor" as a single mom of a six-month-old baby. My boyfriend was too good to be true to myself and my son. I fell in love quickly and soon life was easier and we settled into home life. Three years later I am pregnant with my second child and decided to marry the man I loved. He traveled 4-5 days a week so we decided I would be the at-home caregiver. My relationship changed abruptly when I began to feel isolated and out of touch. I had to fight for a part time job to have a social outlet. I was a fine dining server and enjoyed the easy money that was mine. I had to work only when my husband was …
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To get rid of a sociopath, think out of the box!
One way to convince a sociopath to leave you alone may be to make yourself unappealing. Here are suggestions from a Lovefraud reader: Why all the drama with the cops, probation, looking over shoulder, parole, etc.? The secret seems to be getting the stalker to want no further parts of you. My cousin did that by explaining an elective surgery as a bowel surgery and with a product called Liquid Ass sprayed down the back of her pants confronted him outside her house with the explanation that it's a lifelong after effect she'll have to live with. This sociopath was a daily threat and annoyance and that was the last time she ever saw him, which was August of 2011. Horrid stench along with …
Mary Ann Glynn: Deceit – the most destructive abuse
By Mary Ann Glynn, located in Bernardsville, New Jersey I have noticed that those who get involved with a sociopath, whether it's for 30 years or three months, the relationship has the same devastating effect. I've heard some describe even a brief encounter with a sociopath as the most destructive relationship they'd ever been in, even if they had previously been in a physically abusive relationship. What makes this true? Loss of value and power Any abusive relationship is destructive. In order to survive it, a person has to sublimate their needs and their identity, and a loss of self is experienced over time. Self-esteem is battered. Ongoing exposure to physical or verbal degradation from …
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Mary Ann Glynn: Mind Warrior app helps you reclaim your lost self and heal from PTSD
By Mary Ann Glynn, located in Bernardsville, New JerseyIn recent years technology has made it possible to study as never before how the brain works and what can effectively change and heal it. Neuroplasticity, the opening of new neural pathways in the brain, is the key factor. I developed a therapeutic app to help this process, called Mind Warrior â„¢. Survival mode For those caught in a relationship with a sociopath, the brain's response to the ongoing trauma puts us in “survival mode” and we can lose our grip on the ability to cope (choose positive and healthy ways of feeling). Indeed, we can be stuck in the cycle of abuse and deception, which produces feelings of confusion, u …
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3 Signs You Should Stop Hurting the Sociopath in Your Life
So you're wondering if you're with someone who has a character disorder? Maybe a narcissist? Or a sociopath? If you are, you might often be accused of hurting that poor person. Here are three things you might be blamed for, otherwise known as red flags: 1. A person with a character disorder is not responsible for his or her life. You are. And if you don't step up to the plate with a full wallet, lots of energy, and a constant smile, then you're going to hear about it. About how mean you are. Uncaring. Unloving. Unwilling. Even if you've been stepping up to the plate with all of the above for years and are simply worn out by your partner's inability to invest alongside you. Even when you're …
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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Addicted to my relationship with a sociopath
Editor's Note: The letter to Lovefraud was submitted by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Gwenda." My name is Gwenda and I am 27 years old. I'd like to share my story with you in hopes of getting some advice, help, or possibly sharing my story with someone going through this that could possible help them and they can relate to. Last year I started dating a guy who I believed to be the man of my dreams to discover I was dating a demon sociopath. When I met him he seemed like the most normal guy, told me he was in construction, going back to school to become a helicopter pilot, had lived in so many parts of the world, was so cultured, and extremely good looking and charming. He really made …
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Helping Children Heal While Co-parenting with a Sociopath
by Quinn Pierce I sat on the now familiar, well worn bench outside the courtroom, and I watched the strained faces of the people around me as I waited for our name to be called. It was our fourth appearance in the family court due to my son's unexcused absences resulting from an illness the school has yet to acknowledge. The whole process has been exhausting, to say the least, but it's been made even worse by the carnival-like antics being performed by my ex-husband and his lawyer. As usual, a situation that should solely be about supporting our child has been turned into another Look At Me, I'm the Victim one-act play. It seems that any captive audience lately has become an op …
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Holidays with a Sociopath
There's no exact formula for spending life's special events with a sociopath, but one thing's for sure. It won't be good for you. With the 4th of July coming tomorrow, I decided to spend some time talking about life's biggest events and sweetest moments. Weddings. Birthdays. Funerals. Births. Christmas. Hanukah. Anniversaries. And any other special time or ritual that gives our humanity a chance to feel the deeper meaning of life. To watch the fireworks. To celebrate our bonds to each other. To remember our heritage. To take a breath and step away from the daily grind so we can look around and appreciate what's most important to us. And feel the joy that comes with it. And because our …
Why I Wrote ‘Discarded: One Mother’s Journey with a Psychopath’
By Indie Mom I never started out to write a book, let alone a personal memoir, laying bare the most intimate and personal details between my husband and me and our children. Looking back four years since he left our family home, I can barely believe the repressed stories that have surfaced, and even more, stories that make complete sense to someone other than me. Because I had endured years of gas lighting, projection, triangulation and manipulation at the hands of my husband and father of my children, I looked and felt like a very unwell person when I tried to share anything with our closest friends and family members. Eventually, when our house of cards came tumbling down, there …
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