Yesterday I was standing in line, horrified at how a man in front of me was treating his two little girls. The girls looked to be about two and four years old. One of them was in a stroller. He yelled at the older girl I don't know why. When she started crying, he yelled at her again, threatening to hit her if she didn't stop crying. No matter what the kids did dropped a blanket on the floor, touched the stanchion rope the guy yelled. If this father was treating his kids this way in public what in the world was he doing at home? Make no mistake the guy was engaging in child abuse, and the kids will likely suffer from it for the rest of their lives. I'm not exaggerating. Research shows …
Victims of Sociopaths and Victim Blamers
Searching for inspiration for this post, I stumbled across some pretty unattractive, “victim blaming” directed to someone who had been involved in a relationship with a person who is likely a sociopath. Victim Blaming I find victim blaming unattractive for humanitarian and moral reasons, but I also find a deep irony in victim blaming—that the person accusing others of naivety and a lack of insight about human behavior, is in fact, themselves, displaying profound naivety and a lack of insight about human behavior. It's as if they are assuming that all people have the same experiences and opportunities, hence if someone is deceived by a sociopath, it can only be due to that person's inherent w …
What happens to your brain with PTSD, and a promising technique to fix it
Many, many people involved with sociopaths end up with post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, symptoms of PTSD include: Flashbacks Bad dreams Frightening thoughts Staying away from places, events, or objects that are reminders of the traumatic experience Feeling emotionally numb Feeling strong guilt, depression or worry Losing interest in activities that were enjoyable in the past Having trouble remembering the dangerous event Being easily startled Feeling tense or "on edge" Having difficulty sleeping Having angry outbursts Negative thoughts about oneself or the world Distorted feelings like guilt of shame How do you get PTSD? Your …
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How Sociopaths Fool You Into Thinking They’re You’re Friend
Chapter 4 Richard Parker Is Not Your Friend Psychopathic expert Kent Kiehl has contributed enormously to the field. He says that every adult psychopath he has ever worked with was different as a child, and not in a good way. When he looks through their prison files, he finds all kinds of stories about how much trouble they caused, how they never connected with friends, how they didn't join teams, and how they were ultimately the black sheep of their families. Sounds like what you would expect, right? A psychopath is not and never was your friend. Here's my issue. Kiehl works with prisoners. Prisoners have been caught. And so when you believe him—which is likely, since he's an e …
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Silly science: Researchers say liking bitter foods is linked to antisocial personality traits
Every day, my breakfast is topped with curry powder, which contains turmeric, which is bitter. I must have my coffee in the morning. For lunch I usually eat a salad containing arugula and radishes. I love using fresh herbs from my garden, such as parsley, basil and cilantro. And I'd love to eat dark chocolate every day, but I resist that. All of the foods I mentioned are bitter, so I must be a sociopath. Researchers from the University of Innsbruck in Austria say that they've found an association between people who say they like bitter foods and antisocial personality traits. According to reports on Science Direct and Medical Daily, almost 1,000 people all Americans were handed long lists …
Therapy Satisfaction Survey: Did you seek counseling because of a difficult relationship? How did it go?
If you've found your way to Lovefraud, most likely it's because you experienced an abusive or destructive relationship. Did you also seek professional counseling? If so, Lovefraud wants to know about your experience. We are collecting data for a scientific research paper about the experiences of people who seek therapy in the context of an abusive relationship. Your relationship could have been with anybody: Partner Parent Sibling Boss Other The survey will ask you questions like: What aspects of the therapy were helpful or not helpful? Did you engage in couples or joint counseling? How satisfied were you with the services you received? It has multiple-choice questions and some questions …
Overt and covert narcissists
According to an article by Scott Barry Kaufman on the Scientific American Blog, there are two types of narcissists: "While the 'overt' narcissists tended to be aggressive, self-aggrandizing, exploitative, and have extreme delusions of grandeur and a need for attention," he writes, "'covert' narcissists were more prone to feelings of neglect or belittlement, hypersensitivity, anxiety, and delusions of persecution." Researchers have developed the Maladaptive Covert Narcissism Scale. It has 23 statements, and people are supposed to rate the degree to which the statements describe them. Kaufman includes the scale in this article does it apply to anyone you know? 23 signs you're secretly a …
How your brain enables you to be deceived
When we finally catch on that everything a sociopath told us was a lie, most of us are furious with ourselves for not seeing the deception. We should cut ourselves some slack. A documentary that aired on the History channel explains why our brains misinterprets what we observe, and/or totally misses what is going on around us. "We believe first, and ask questions later," says science writer Jeff Wise in the show. Your Bleeped Up Brain: Deception, on History.com. Link provided by a Lovefraud reader. …
Men, women, leadership and personality disorders
Why are there more men in business management then women? In the Harvard Business Review, Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, professor of business psychology at University College London, argues that it's because we can't distinguish competence from confidence. Who exhibits tremendous confidence? People with personality disorders narcissism, psychopathy, histrionic. And statistically, more men are disordered than women. Chomorro-Premuzic also points out that the characteristics that enable disordered people to get the job are also the characteristics that make them fail. Why do so many incompetent men become leaders? on HBR.org. Thanks to the Lovefraud reader Ann Stevenson for sending the link. …
Researchers say a wide face predicts psychopathic traits in men
Wow might there be a way to spot a psychopathic man just by looking at him? Researchers from Goethe University in Frankfurt, Germany, have published a paper showing that a man's facial width-to-height ratio (fWHR) predicts psychopathy. In a study that included undergraduate students and prison inmates, the researchers found an association between the fWHR and the psychopathy traits of fearless dominance, self-centered impulsivity, and with overall psychopathy scores. According to the Daily Mail, "Last year, a separate study found both men and women with wide faces tend to be more aggressive, dominant and angry." What's interesting is that this research apparently began with monkeys. …
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