How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

To parents who have children with a sociopathic partner: There is hope

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Editor's note: This story was contributed by the Lovefraud reader who posts under the name "Getting There." I am guessing my story has many similarities to other victims of a sociopath. I fell in love with a façade. Charming, witty, so attentive, madly in love, a whirlwind intense romance followed by a long slow cruel erosion of my personality. By the time I plucked up the courage to finish the relationship some 13 years later, we had 2 children, a daughter and a son. I was convinced that everything was my fault, I was mad and a terrible human being. For months and months, I chanted a mantra, ' This is not all my fault. There were 2 people in our relationship. Life will get better!' This …

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Why her happy marriage did not exist

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Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader: I was not in a disastrous relationship with my S. Our relationship was less than three years, our marriage less than two when he openly cheated and decided to leave me, then played games of false reconciliation, which in hindsight were so he could have two sex partners. The short end of my question is ”¦ How do you reconcile the basically happy marriage, the illusion of a man you married with the horrible monster he has become in trying to create turmoil in your life and use your greatest love (your child) to hurt you? Range of behavior One reason why it's so difficult to spot sociopaths is because they are not all the same. …

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Documentary producer Vivian McGrath reveals her abusive first marriage

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When Vivian McGrath was an 18-year-old actress, she met a man at a party who swept her off her feet. He was handsome, intense and oozed sexual chemistry. They talked for hours. Vivian was already hooked. She tells her story in her first-person article published in the Daily Mail. It sounds like all of the stories published on Lovefraud. When Vivian was seven months pregnant with their child, her husband strangled her, and almost killed her. Yet when the baby was born, Vivian allowed him back into her life. Every child needs a father, right? He promised to change. Well, we all know how that went. After a few more years, Vivian left him for good. She recovered and remarried. Now she is …

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Sociopaths Lack Empathy–Even For Their Own Children

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Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 38B: By now, I hope you are catching on to sociopath math and can predict Paul's reaction to arriving late with Daniel's birthday pizza. “But I just got here, and I cut my day short to get the pizza,” Paul said. “Paul,” I replied, “we have to leave or the kids will be late to practice. We'll heat it up when we get back.” “I never said I'd be able to get here earlier,” …

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My Unwitting Relationship With A Sociopath Corroded Who “I” Was

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Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 37B: “It's Like Deja  Vu All Over Again.” (Yogi Berra) Soon after, I required minor surgery. As I had with Jessica's testing, I involved Paul when setting a date for the procedure to ensure he would be available to help the kids and me. I was forced to reschedule my procedure two times, because Paul's work demands kept trumping my health needs. Two days before the surgery, he …

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Is it parental alienation, or protecting children from sociopaths?

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Editor's note: The Lovefraud reader "tootrusting" posted the following as a comment on yesterday's article, Horrifying saga of multiple predators, sexually abused children and murder. She asked an important question. Donna, have you heard about the young 12-year-old girl in Georgia, who took her own life, and streamed it live for all to see? This tragedy occurred December 30, 2016, and I just learned of it yesterday. It seems she had to grow up very young in life, and just could not take it anymore. This story has rocked me, and my heart breaks for the life this young soul endured. It appears many people, whom she should've been able to count on, repeatedly let her down. Mom, Dad, …

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My sociopathic ex-husband led my son into the lion’s den

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a woman whom we'll call "Eleanor." Names have been changed. The sociopath is my ex-husband. We were married for 10 years, two children, girl and boy. He changed THE DAY we were married. He has alcohol problem, cheated on me, lies. When I asked him to see marriage counselor, he told me to go by myself. I went for counseling by myself for approximately 4 months and was told, "I can either counsel you to live with him or counsel you to live without him." This is way before I figured out he is a sociopath, I decided this was not my idea of love. So I told ex that I was going for divorce. He was enraged. Would not give me money for …

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Sociopaths Can Turn On You In A Heartbeat

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Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 31: Not Your Everyday Walk In The Park Soon after the cookie incident, I was in a park near Paul's office when I noticed two people who worked for Paul eating a bag lunch while sitting on the park swings. Neither of them recognized me. The only time I had met them was at a holiday party, and I had been dressed up with makeup, contacts, and my hair down. With blue jeans and a …

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How to survive divorcing a narcissistic or borderline partner

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Here's the first thing you need to know about divorcing a narcissistic or borderline partner: It will not be a "normal" divorce. Yes, divorce is always painful. But if you think your divorce will be like those of your friends or relatives messy, but in the end, fairly reasonable — well, you are at risk of being blindsided. If your partner is narcissistic or borderline, you're in for a "high conflict" divorce. You need to be prepared. In her Lovefraud CE webinar, Sonia Brill, LCSW, will tell you what to expect before, during and after the divorce. Whether you are contemplating making a break, or are already in the midst of the drama, she'll tell you how to move forward. Step 1: Assess …

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He’s Not Depressed, Anxious, or Sleep Deprived–He’s a Sociopath!

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By O.N. Ward Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 17 : The Twilight Zone With my biological clock ticking loudly, once we had been at our new jobs for eighteen months, Paul and I decided it was time to have children. After just two months of trying, the pregnancy test registered positive. I danced around our house. At last, I was going to be a mother! Oddly, Paul showed little interest in our developing child. …

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