Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Bridgette." This is the first time that I have publicly talked about my experience with a sociopath. It happened when I was 19 years old, and I'm 34 now. Ever since this so-called engagement happened, I've never had a "normal," relationship with a man. I won't say that this man ruined me, but he took something from me that I can never get back. I go back to 1997 and I remember starting up a relationship with a guy who I met in a chatroom, just by chance. We started IM'ing each other, and as time went by, I started calling Maryland and he was calling California. I fell in love with him immediately. He …
TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: He took away someone I loved
Editor's note: The following email came from an Australian man who we'll call “Roger.” It recounts his years of experiences with someone he originally met in high school, who he thought was a friend, but turned out to be a sociopath. Notice how this particular sociopath seemed to get nothing from Roger but the pleasure of destroying his love life. My encounter with the sociopath began in high school at 16 years of age (1994). My younger brother, who was 12, started high school at this time. My brother and I are completely different in both in looks and in personality. I am the outgoing type, whereas my brother is the reserved type. We are like salt and pepper, never really understood why …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: I have found a new pride and fearlessness
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a young woman whom we'll call “Adriana.” The name in the story below has been changed. This is a story about two girls who were on the same sports team in high school. Both showed lots of potential and both won lots of achievement awards ”¦ Both went on to do athletics in college. One was a sociopath ”¦ the other was shy and introverted. I was the introvert. Other people saw my success, but I just enjoyed athletics and was not seriously competitive... I was excellent because I enjoyed it. As strange as that sounds. I moved a lot as a kid... This last high school was the one I went to the longest: three years. Little did I know, …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: I can’t help but wish he was the sweet, “genuine” person I fell for
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following e-mail from a young woman whom we'll call “Krista.” She needs support. If you have any words of encouragement, please offer them. I am so lost and upset. I am 22, I was with a guy for about a year ”¦ he swept me off my feet with his charm and seemingly genuine character. I am a good girl, never got into anything bad, partied in college but never got in trouble. I met my ex out of pure boredom, knew him from high school (he had a terrible "bad boy" reputation). He literally said all the right things, charmed me and I fell hard. He got me with his sad story too (his mom passed away when he was 10 from a heroin overdose, and has 5 siblings an …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: It was all for ‘our’ business, ‘our’ future
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader in Belgium who posts as “Nicola0903.” English is not her first language. Four years with a Sociopath. He was my best friend, my family, my soul mate, my lover, my business partner. I was 29, a foreigner in Belgium, with already some life experiences. Because my ex-business partner and ex-boyfriend that time decided suddenly to leave our brand new company, I stood there ”¦ Alone ”¦ with new clean sheet with “BVBA with marketing activities” on it — my job and hobby. I started “to swim between the sharks” and with success till I met HIM. “HE” was one of my first big clients. A charming, a good looking guy, around 40, an …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: Teenager shares wisdom about life’s hidden truth
Editor's note: Almost a year ago, Lovefraud received a letter from Mandy, a 15-year-old who told her distressing story about a “relationship” with a sociopathic guy. Read it here: I didn't want to be alone and believed that he loved me. Well, it's a year later, and Mandy has written to Lovefraud again. She's grown. She's matured. Her letter contains so much wisdom that I'm astounded it came from a 16-year-old. I invite you to read—and learn. Life is hard; I think everyone can agree on that. It's true when people say life is like a roller coaster. People have their ups and downs, twists and turns and every day is a new adventure. It's important to slow down in life and to n …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: I met him on Facebook, was used for sex and dumped the next day
Editor's note: Lovefraud received this e-mail from a reader whom we'll call “Lara.” About three months ago, I met a 34-year-old German banker from Munich online (he added me on Facebook), after being very hesitant to speak to him, I gave into his persistence and we started a whirlwind romance over the phone for two months. He asked me to meet him in Paris and I did a few weeks ago, only to be dumped the day after we had sex together. I have been asking myself for answers but it was only recently that my friend brought to my attention that Y (German banker) exhibited the key traits of a sociopath. Y added me randomly on Facebook and we had one mutual friend (A fellow Korean Uni student a …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: I didn’t want to be alone and believed that he loved me
Editor's note: The following story was submitted by a reader who we'll call Mandy. Mandy is 15 years old and dated a sociopathic guy, who was two years older, for over a year. Notice how similar the sociopath's behaviors are to what many of us adults experienced—an indication that this manipulative behavior is instinctual in sociopaths. A person cannot be diagnosed a sociopath until the age of 18, but can start showing symptoms at a young age. He was 15 and I was only 13. We lived in two separate towns. We met on the computer off of an Internet website called Facebook and then started talking all the time on phone. I was a perfect victim. I had no self-esteem when I was younger b …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: How do you handle a high school bully?
Lovefraud recently received a letter from a 17-year-old high school student--we'll call him Brandon. He wrote that another boy at school was using manipulation to bully him. When Brandon resisted, the bully asked what he had done wrong, and why Brandon was being so mean—I can almost hear the false concern and sincerity dripping from his voice. The bully told Brandon to apologize. What happened next was classic sociopathic behavior. Here's what Brandon wrote: When I moved away from him, he came and found me and was aggressive and wouldn't leave me alone. And kept getting other people involved by asking them to ask me why I wouldn't talk to him. He then punched me and blamed me for p …
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TARGETED TEENS AND 20s: The Marine and the sociopath
My name is Jonathan L. Spear. I serve in the United States Marine Corps. All my life I have considered myself a strong minded person who is kind hearted and loving of the world. I help all I can, I give strangers rides, I take in my friends who have fallen on bad times and help them get back on their feet and am willing to die for those I love and even people I don't know. I am currently stationed near Baghdad, Iraq and well we don't have a whole lot to do out here so I was watching a movie and there was this girl in it who said she has been called a sociopath by doctors but before they said that I had noticed that this girl had acted a lot like one of my ex's. So I decided to do some …
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