On and off for the past four years, I’ve been mentioning my upcoming book about my experience with a sociopath, James Montgomery, and my recovery from the ordeal. Well, the book, Love Fraud—How marriage to a sociopath fulfilled my spiritual plan, is at the printer, and will be available in about a month.
In writing the book, I had five goals:
- Drawing attention to the problem of sociopaths.
- Showing how sociopaths weave their web of lies to trap people.
- Exposing the impotence of social institutions in dealing with these predators.
- Explaining why, from a spiritual perspective, we fall into these relationships.
- Offering hope that we can, even after these devastating encounters, recover and flourish.
I’ve launched a new blog specifically for this book. It’s called, simply, Love Fraud ”¦ the book.
I invite all Lovefraud readers to visit the new blog. You’ll find more information about the book. You’ll be able to read the introduction and a chapter. I even have a photo gallery. And, there are reviews. I’ve asked some Lovefraud authors and members to read advance copies of the book and write their impressions. Two are posted.
Autographed and numbered copies, plus FREE shipping
My family, of course, has known for a long time that I’ve been working on the book. Two years ago, my young nephew, then eight years old, asked me, “Can I have the first one?”
Of course, I said yes. Then I thought, how will he know which is the first one?
The solution is autographed and numbered first edition copies, which we’re making available to all Lovefraud readers in a special pre-order offer. If you reserve your book now, while it’s at the printer, when they arrive, I will autograph and number it, in the order in which purchases are received. (We’re up to number 5.)
Plus, SHIPPING IS FREE for all U.S. destinations. International shipping is 40% off.
For more information about this offer, visit the Lovefraud Store.
Different discussion
I’ll keep posting articles on Love Fraud ”¦ the book. As you all have a chance to read the book, you may have questions, which I’ll do my best to answer.
I expect that the blog will take our discussion of entanglements with sociopaths into a new direction. As painful as it was, I learned that the entire experience was an opportunity for spiritual growth. Although we’ve touched on the topic here on the Lovefraud Blog, it will be even more prominent on the new blog.
If you want to post a comment on the Lovefraud Book blog, your regular log-in credentials should work. The log-in link is on right side of the page, at the bottom. If you have any problems, please let me know.
Stop on by.
Harold
I have to say I would have enjoyed reading a non-fiction book about a person (or persons) experience with sociopaths – specifically dealing with them through the legal system. Sorry but I have to say this sentence puts me off buying the book: Seeking to understand why her life was ravaged, Donna developed an ability to channel spiritual guidance, and learned that her soul planned the entire debacle.
While I appreciate that some people find solace in religious supports and such, I won’t be reading it. I prefer facts.
Donna Andersen
Harold,
I assure you, the book has plenty of facts. I paint a comprehensive picture of what my ex did to me and seven other women. I also expose the impotence of the legal system in dealing with it all.
I realize that the spiritual aspect isn’t for everyone, but it was my experience. Although it was a hard lesson, in a way, it was a relief to learn that there was a reason for it all.
Twice Betrayed
Congratulations, Donna! Ordering my copy.
survivorlady
Hi Massie,
Welcome. I am new here too, but already I feel “connected”. Bunch of wonderful people. No one else would understand unless one has been face to face with a sociopath. I sometimes read and read, and after feel better. I felt so alone for awhile because I thought I was the only one. Its been over 1 year for me and I am much better. I have my days…sometimes overwheling trying to raise two teenage kids, working full-time, taking care of my elderly parents, my house and everything else in life….but at the same time I would never give it up….kids are mine to raise the right way (he abbandoned them) and I do not have to play tug of war with anything. But when I get overwhelmed, I come here and read and it makes me feel better. Thank you all, and welcome to you Massie.
Take care.
super chic
Really looking forward to getting the book. I have questions in my mind about the spirtual aspect of things, in addition to recovery. Spathy boy popped by AGAIN, like one of those inflatable clowns that you punch down and it pops back up (ok, maybe they don’t make those anymore! lol).
What’s the lesson here? Do I have to learn the lesson over and over? Be strong and put the armor on everyday!
Donna Andersen
Shabbychic,
I can’t wait for the book to be printed so I can ship them to you. We get the final cover proof tomorrow!
The bottom line on the spiritual aspect is that our objective is to release these interactions on a very deep level. Not just intellectually, but experientially.
Ox Drover
Harold, I would like to comment on your deciding to not read the book because of the “spiritual” aspect of Donna’s healing path.
I was one of the reviewers of the “proof” books, and when I received it in the mail in the late afternoon, I LITERALLY could not put it down and read all through the night—I knew the “story” already and how it ended, but could not put the book down.
Donna and I have different “spiritual” paths, but that doesn’t to me mean that she is “nuts” or that I am “nuts” because we believe there is more to the “human condition” than blood and bones and electrolytes, or that we think there is a meaning to the universe. Donna’s personal spiritual beliefs are NOT fiction, they are her beliefs. She is NOT trying to “convert” you or anyone else to those beliefs, simply stating how they helped her cope with the chaos and pain of her recovery and found some meaning in the chaos.
You are welcome to your Lack of spiritual beliefs, but just as we don’t make snide remarks about that, I would appreciate it if you would not make snide remarks about Donna’s beliefs or of anyone else’s beliefs.
super chic
Releasing these actions on a very deep level will be very helpful to me. When spathy was here I still wished my dream was true 🙁 I refuse to be weak and take 10 steps backwards, but it’s tough because I still love my fantasy, I need to release that, it was too harmful to me. I know the predator is still out there, waiting to pounce.
Ox Drover
Dear Chic,
Sweetie, we just have to make NEW GOALS, and point ourselves toward a distant star! But you know, I think that it isn’t the REACHING the goal that is so important as that we are working toward something. That we are enjoying the TRIP! What’s that old saying “Life is what happens while we are making other plans?” Or something like that.
After my husband died I thought there was no way I could be happy alone–and in 2 weeks, it will be 6 years since he died–but I don’t have a relationship, and I’m quite content without one. I feel WHOLE, not empty. If I were to stumble upon a GOOD relationship that would be nice, but it’s still okay without one. I don’t feel sad or incomplete all the time any more. I think reality is a good place to be, as well. I’m satisfried in the skin I’m in.
super chic
I thought I was well on my road to recovery, but I guess I wasn’t… because just seeing him and talking to him for a few minutes when he made the suprise pop-in visit really made me sad. I do want to enjoy the “trip”, I don’t want to “wait” until some special undefined moment happens, otherwise I miss my life, exactly what you said, Oxy… rignt now the days are just blowing by.
I think there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely.
Like Dr. Phil said “If I have to be alone, I’m a good person to do it with”!!!!!