Lovefraud frequently hears from readers who have been discarded by sociopaths, but still feel like they're in love with them, and can't get them out of their minds. We frequently tell these readers that sociopathic relationships are very much like addictions. Now, there's proof. A recent study found that "the pain anguish of rejection by a romantic partner may be the result of activity in parts of the brain associated with motivation, reward and addiction cravings," according to Science Daily. Read Romantic rejection stimulates areas of brain involved with motivation, reward and addiction on sciencedaily.com. Link submitted by a Lovefraud reader. …
Dear Abby and the narcissist
Last week I happened to read a Dear Abby column in the newspaper. A woman wrote to Abby that she had been married to a man for 15 years who was controlling and manipulative, along with being emotionally, economically and sexually abusive. The letter-writer termed her husband narcissistic and passive-aggressive, but in my view he may be a sociopath. The woman is filing for divorce. Her dilemma is that her husband projects a “good guy” image, and she fears that if she accuses him of abuse, no one will believe her. Abby's advice was to tell a few close girlfriends what really happened. “The truth will spread like wildfire,” Abby wrote. I wonder if Abby gave good advice for this …
LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: The long grift
Editor's note: The following story was received from a reader who we'll call “Violet.” I knew L when we worked together at a call centre as customer service representatives. He seemed nice, and he had lovely, expressive brown eyes and a gentle nature. I was losing weight at the time, and he asked for my help, so of course I gave him advice and tips. He began to lose weight, and he invited me over to his and his girlfriend, M's, apartment for dinner and to show him some 'exercise moves' (now I think it was mostly an excuse to ogle me). He looked at me very intently, it wasn't menacing, but I definitely felt like he wanted to do more than just watch me. At work he would call me over …
Dirty politician got off easy, feds try for longer sentence
Former Pennsylvania state senator Vincent J. Fumo is a classic sociopath. He brazenly flaunted the rules, used government employees as personal servants and ripped off charities. In March, 2009, he was found guilty of 137 counts of conspiracy, fraud, tax offenses and obstruction of justice. Fumo could have gone to jail for 21 to 27 years. The judge sentenced him to four years and seven months. Many were outraged, including Lovefraud. Yesterday, federal prosecutors appealed the ridiculously light sentence. Read Feds seek longer Fumo sentence on philly.com. …
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Is God A Sociopath?
I've been thinking lately about God, assuming He exists. Mainly, I've been thinking about the Judeo-Christian biblical conception of God, and asking myself, crazy as this sounds, if He exists, Is God a sociopath? I pose this question seriously, and apologize in advance for offending anyone by probing this idea. But consider: You are expected to worship Him. You are expected to acknowledge His perfection. You are expected to live by His standards. You are expected to fear His Judgement. You are expected to please, not disappoint Him. You are expected to do penance when you've strayed from His rules. You are expected to be in awe of, and fear, His omniscience. You …
Committed
Editor's note: Here is another satirical piece by the Front Porch Talker. For background, see “My life with a sociopath.” By The Front Porch Talker “And, they endured.” Wm. F. Faulkner I was committed. I remember several poignant moments on the night I was committed, against my will, to an in-patient, lock-down mental facility: the Dalai Lama was in town, and was giving a speech on the television I watched in the Emergency Room, hours BEFORE I had been committed. His message: peace and forgiveness. I have not yet forgiven, but I do feel peaceful. Also: My close friend and her sister had brought me to the Emergency Room of the hospital. They and all the medical professionals …
LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Do I drop the restraining order again?
Editor's Note. Lovefraud received the following e-mail from a woman who we'll call “Ursula.” Nine times, Ursula has filed a restraining order against her husband. Eight times she dropped it. She is due in court within a couple of weeks on the ninth order. He is pressing her to drop it, and she is wavering. It has been 8 long years, 9 restraining orders and a child and marriage together. From the first date he brought 2 roses, one because I was beautiful, the second in I was worth it at the end of the date, go figure. Then he let me into the passenger's side of the car and he came into through the drivier's side and said I failed because I didn't reach over and unlock his door before he …
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Quarterback Michael Vick possibly in trouble again
Almost a year ago, Lovefraud wrote about Michael Vick, the NFL quarterback who was convicted of running a dog fighting ring, released from jail and hired by the Philadelphia Eagles. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) objected to Vick's reinstatement in the NFL. They wrote to Roger Goodell, league commissioner, stating that the quarterback fit the profile for antisocial personality disorder. Last year's Lovefraud article asked the question, Can Michael Vick change his behavior? The answer, unsurprisingly, may be no. Unlike most sociopaths, Michael Vick is subject to a very public probation. Everyone knows he did time. Everyone knows that for him to keep his job, …
NPR series on psychopaths, the brain and crime
This week, NPR aired a three-part series called Inside the Criminal Brain. It takes a look at neuroscience, genetics and psychopathy. Read or listen to the stories here: A neuroscientist uncovers a dark secret Inside a psychopath's brain: the sentencing debate Can your genes make you murder? Link submitted by a Lovefraud reader. …
James Arthur Ray: Guru or Charlatan?
By Ox Drover The ABC network has a new program called Mind Games that plays on Tuesday evening, and I caught their first show. The show was about James Arthur Ray, who is an advocate of the “Law of Attraction” and was one of the people interviewed on the movie The Secret. Ray has written several “best —selling” books including, Harmonic Wealth as New York Times bestseller. Ray also charges as much as $10,000 for seminars. Ray's biography from Wikipedia states that he was born in 1957, the son of a Christian minister who was so poor at times that the family lived in the Church offices. Ray's teachings are described as a “mix of spirituality, motivational speaking and quantum …